Life As We Know It
by AminalLuv
Summary: Logan wakes up naked next to his best friend. Will their lives ever be the same? ROGAN
1. Prologue

**Title: Life As We Know It**

**Summary: Logan wakes up naked next to his best friend; will their lives ever be the same?**

**Background: OK, some things you need to know...Rory and Logan became friends when she was 10 and he was 11 and have been best friends ever since. ****Dean and Jess both happened but the Dean/Lindsay cheating fiasco happened differently then on the show, which will be explained more fully in the story. I think that's all you need to know for now. **

**AN: I know that the last thing I should be doing right now is starting another story but this idea came to me and I just loved it so much I had to write it. Besides, there's only like, 3 more chapters of Skip a Beat and then I'll be back to only having 2 stories. This is my first attempt at something AU so I hope it doesn't suck ;) Let me know what you think.**

* * *

As consciousness slowly invaded his body he felt his arm draped over something...or someone. _Shit_. Had he really spent the entire night with a girl? He never did that, he always snuck out in the middle of the night; his presence in a girl's bed the morning after would only elicit questions and expectations he wasn't ready to deal with. His arm was rising and falling with her breath at an even pace and he thanked the gods that whoever she was was still asleep. He opened his eyes, preparing himself for the mad dash, and found himself looking at a head of chestnut brown curls. As he slowly lifted his arm from around her waist he caught the sweet, wild berry scent of her hair and blind panic set it. 

Without a coherent thought he wrenched his arm away and rolled over so quickly he fell off the bed with a _thud_. He winced and sat up to look at her. She stirred slightly but remained asleep. He let out a sigh of relief. This had to be some sort of bad dream, it couldn't be happening. Maybe it wasn't what he thought. The details of the previous night were still locked somewhere in the recesses of his mind, blocked from his cognizance by the pounding in his ears. If he had been that drunk last night she must have been twice as bad; it was her inititation after all. Maybe he had just stayed with her to make sure she was OK, maybe nothing had happened. But one quick glance at his state of undress told him that something had indeed happened.

He scurried across the floor looking for his boxers and pulled them on. He tip toed over to the closet and pulled out the hotel bathrobe, sliding it onto his body before walking out of the bedroom and into the living room beyond. He didn't even know how they had gotten here. They had been assigned to two adjoining, but still very separate rooms at the Waldorf Astoria and here they were not only in the same suite, but the same bed, at the Plaza.

He walked over to the sofa and slumped down onto it. How had he let this happen? He was her sponsor, he was her best friend. He was was supposed to watch out for her and make sure she didn't do anything stupid. Well, he had let her do something stupid and that stupid thing was him. _Fuck fuck fuck_! he cursed to himself, this could ruin everything. Could their friendship survive this? What if she wanted something more now? Worse yet, what if she wanted nothing to do with him at all; what if she blamed him for taking advantage of her? Had he taken advantage of her? He tried to remember the course of events that had led them to that bed. Who had made the first move? How had the other retaliated? What had prompted it?

Flashes of recollection suddenly invaded his mind and he tried to process them. The memories were short but vivid; the scent of her perfume mingled with his cologne, the strength of her tongue as it dueled with his, the image of her sapphire blue eyes clouding with lust, the taste of her as he took her alabaster skin in his mouth and sucked gently, the sound of her voice calling out his name in ecstasy. _NO! No no no_. This was bad. It was very very bad. He had _enjoyed _it. Well of course he had enjoyed it, sex was usually an enjoyable activity for him, but he had _really _enjoyed it. She was his best friend of ten years, his confidant, his second family- and he had spent the night having the most amazing sex of his life with her? What the hell was he going to do now?

How? How had he let this happen...

* * *

**AN: Short I know, but it's just a prologue, the other chapters will be much longer. Next up...the flashback.**


	2. Your Journey Begins

**AN: ****OK so I PROMISE that I'm going to write the next chapter of Skip a Beat next. I know I've been remiss when I get reviews for this story telling me to update that one. I have a mid term tomorrow so I have to study for the rest of tonight but I'm gonna write tomorrow and _hopefully_ I'll have it up before the end of the day though I make no garuntees. **

**We're going back in time, this chapter and the next few will take place the day before the the prologue.**

* * *

Rory Gilmore-Hayden sat on the bed in her dorm room, books spread out in front of her, a pencil stuck through her messy bun, chewing on the cap of her highlighter. It was early on a Friday afternoon and her classes for the week had ended. She had a lot of work to do for her classes next week and she was trying to get ahead since she had a sneaking suspicion that she wouldn't have much time this weekend...

**In Omnia Paratus**

**Your Journey Begins**

**-LDB**

That was the note that had been taped to her window, two days before. To most people it would have made absolutely no sense, even if they'd taken Latin and knew that _In Omnia Paratus_ meant "ready for anything," but Rory had friends who were not very good at keeping secrets from her. The LDB, Life and Death Brigade, was a secret society at Yale that her friends belonged to and she knew it wouldn't be long before she was welcomed to the fold. She had no idea when they would come for her or where they were taking her but she was determined to get her work done before it happened.

Apparently determination wasn't enough as Logan burst through her door at that very moment. "OK, let's go," he said, grabbing her hand and pulling her up off the bed.

"Go where, Logan?" she asked, throwing her free hand up in frustration. She hated not knowing what was going to happen.

"You got the note, didn't you?" he replied.

"Yes, but..."

"Well then, I'm sure you figured it out. You're a smart girl, Ace. Where's your stuff?"

"What stuff?" she asked him with annoyance in her voice.

"Don't tell me you're not ready," he chided.

"Ready for what?" she tried again, still hoping to weasel some information out of him.

"Ready for _anything_," he said, with a roll of his eyes. "Seriously, Ace. I think all that studying you do is starting to fry your brain. It's like one of those "Just Say No" commercials with the eggs. 'This is your brain; this is your brain on studying.' You need a break. Now I figured you wouldn't take your orders seriously so I came early to help you out." He looked at his watch. "It's now...1:53. You have 7 minutes to pack." He walked to her closet and pulled out a Louis Vuitton travel bag. "I'll help you." He began grabbing things from her closet and throwing them in a bag. "Are you just going to stand there?" he asked.

She sighed and bent down to start folding the things he had thrown into the bag in a heap. She looked up and saw that he was walking towards her dresser. "Logan," she scolded as she noticed him opening one of her drawers. "Don't go in there."

"Well unless you're planning on going commando all weekend you're going to need underwear," he replied matter-of-factly, as though it were perfectly OK for him to be digging through her underwear drawer.

"That doesn't mean you need to see it. Stop that right now," she commanded.

"It's no big deal, Ace."

"It's icky. It's you. You're not supposed to see my underwear. No one's supposed to see my underwear," she argued.

He turned around, something lacy dangling from his finger. "Even this?" he asked with a mischievous gleam in his eye.

"Logan!"

"I'm sorry, Ace but who in the hell did you buy this for, because I'm going to need to know who's ass to kick."

"Oh stop it, you're not going to kick anyone's ass. Now give that here!" she yelled, grasping for the lingerie which he held just out of her reach.

"Not until you tell me who it's for," he threatened, raising the article of clothing just above their heads.

"It's not for anyone. It _was _for..." she trailed off at the thought of Dean.

"He saw you in _this_?" Logan asked incredulously. He had always hated Dean, he wasn't good enough for Rory. No guy was good enough for Rory and personally, he liked to think that she would grow old surrounded by friends and loved ones who could make her laugh and smile, but that she would never know the touch of a man. Still, if she had to have sex there were a million guys out there that would have been better for her than Dean.

"He never got the chance," she whispered. She felt tears springing up behind her eyes and she sat back down on her bed, trying to regain her composure. It had been over a month and it felt like she wasn't getting any better, it still hurt so much. He had been her first, her only and she had loved him. He had claimed to love her too, he said that it was completely over with Lindsay, that he didn't love her anymore, that he had never loved her like he loved Rory, but as soon as Lindsay had offered to take him back he had dropped Rory like last weeks edition of Star Magazine; something entertaining and good to pass the time with but not to be taken seriously.

Logan placed the lingerie back down in the drawer. He felt horrible. They always joked around about sex but it was never serious. The idea of Rory and sex in a serious capacity was definitely out of his comfort zone; she was his best friend, practically like a little sister to him, ever since that summer they had both spent with their families at the Vineyard when he was 11. But somehow this conversation had turned serious and she looked like she was about to burst out in tears. "I'm sorry," he said, squatting down in front of her and brushing a strand of hair out of her face. "I was just joking around, I shouldn't have pushed it."

"It's not your fault," she choked out. "I should be over it by now. I don't know why I let it get to me like this."

"Because you loved him. God only knows why..." he said the last part jokingly, with a slight smirk on his face. She chuckled a little in response. "That's my girl." He lifted her chin up a little to make her look at him. "You OK now?" he asked.

She shook her head, "It's just...I shouldn't be upset, I brought this on myself. I mean god, who does that? Who sleeps with a married man? And then to get upset because he went back to his wife? I'm horrible. I'm a horrible, horrible person."

Logan sighed. He hated seeing her like this. She had always been so strong and independent. She had always been the one to be there for him. When he was 12 and had to have his tonsils out and his parents couldn't be bothered to cut their vacation short, she had been the one to bring him ice cream in the hospital everyday. And when he was 15 and his grandmother died and everyone else was too busy talking business at the wake to actually mourn, she had just sat there with him and comforted him. She had always been the one to fix him and now she was the broken one. She hid it well most of the time and he suspected that he was the only one she let see her breakdown like this. He hated that that asshole could hurt her so much with his lies and utter disregard for her feelings. "You are _not _horrible. You made a mistake, no one's immune to making mistakes, Ace. He's the one who really messed up; for lying to you, for making you believe, and mostly- for letting you go. He's an idiot, Rory. Don't let him get to you like this."

"I know, I'll get better, really I will. It just hurts sometimes." She smiled at him slightly, wiping the tears from her eyes.

With that gesture he knew she was done with the conversation for now so he decided to move on. "Well you just don't worry your pretty little head about it," he ordered her, "because you're going to have the time of your life this weekend and you're going to forget all about that lying, cheating bastard."

"Thanks," she responded with another smile, slightly bigger than the last.

"That's what friends are for," he said with a smirk before standing up and pulling her off the bed once more. "Now get changed. There won't be time before the festivities start. First part is casual and wear comfortable shoes, you're going to be doing a lot of walking."

"Walking? Logan, you know I don't do walking. Well, I mean I _walk_, but only the bare minimum. Anything more counts as exercise, and that's against the Gilmore-Hayden rule book."

"You've got five minutes, Ace," he told her as he walked out of the room, ignoring her protests. "After that I'm coming in here and dragging you out by your hair, fully clothed or not." He slammed the bedroom door behind him, leaving her to get ready for a weekend she should never forget but would probably not remember come Monday.

-------------------------------------------------------

Rory walked out of her room a few minutes later dressed in jeans and a long sleeved t-shirt with a Yale zip-up hoodie and a pair of sneakers. She carried the Louis Vuitton bag Logan had packed her things in, along with another plain duffel bag she had filled completely with shoes.

"Alright unidentified location, here we come. Get ready for a whole lot of mischief and more likely than not, a full frontal from Finn."

Logan just smirked and shook his head. "You forgetting something, Ace?"

She looked around at her things trying to decide if she had everything. "I don't think so."

"Let me give you a hint. It's black, made of silk, came with your letter..."

"You're not serious?" she asked him.

"Of course I am. It's the rules."

"But I know who everyone is already. Besides, since when are you a follow-the-rules kind of guy?"

"Since the rules make you look silly and provide me with an excellent source of entertainment. Now go put your blindfold on, all the other initiates have to wear them too."

She groaned frustratedly, but obeyed, running back into her room to grab the blindfold. "I hate you Huntzberger," she declared as she walked back into the common room. She turned her back to him as she placed the blindfold over her eyes and handed him the ends to tie.

"OK, I got your bags. Let's get this show on the road," he told her, leading her out of the dorm. They got outside and he guided her to the car, opening the door and letting her in.

She slid in and let herself adjust to her new surroundings. "Is this the limo, Logan?"

"Great, she's giving away our identities to the other initiates," she heard a familiar voice grumble.

"Hi Colin," she greeted him.

"Stop it, you're not supposed to know who we are."

"Well then, it probably would have been a good idea to send me in a car with members of the brigade that I _don't_ see and hear on a daily basis."

"Can you just pretend to be frightened and confused, Love? It'll make Colin shut up," another voice suggested.

"Finn?" she asked curiously, "It can't be, the sun's still out and you're not complaining...Oh wait," she had a sudden epiphony. "We're initiating Rosemary too, aren't we."

"Hi Ror," the voice of her red headed friend called out.

"Hey Rose. I guess this means Juliette is here too. Hi Julez,"

"Hi Rory." Rory laughed at the knowledge that _these _were the other initiates that Colin was trying to hide their identities from. Rosemary and Juliette were a part of the extended group but they were definitely close enough to recognize the voices of the Brigade members in the car.

"Are you this stealthy around all of your initiates or are we just special?" Rory addressed the boys.

"We're stealthy enough to know not to put the other initiates in the same car as you three and your big mouths," Logan informed them.

"Is Steph here? I haven't heard her voice yet," Rory asked, ignoring Logan's jab.

"She went to the location ahead of us to get stuff set up," Colin responded.

"She went where?" Juliette asked.

"If that was an attempt to find out our location it was pretty pathetic, love." Finn responded.

"But Finny," Rory heard Rosemary coo, "I'm just dying to know where you're taking us."

Rory could practically see the dirty looks that Logan and Colin were sending Finn's way, even though she was blindfolded. "Well...I...it's..." Finn stumbled. "Ow! What the bloody hell was that for?" he suddenly cried out.

"It was to get you to shut your stinking trap," Colin told him angrily.

"It's our own fault. We should know not to let Finn be around Rosemary. Do we have an extra blindfold? Maybe we can use it to gag him," Logan suggested.

"Hey mate!" Finn protested.

"So boys," Rory interjected. "How many laws are you going to make us break tonight?"

"Don't worry, Ace. We won't let you go to jail," Logan assured her.

"They've taken all the fun out of I-night," Finn pouted.

"We did not take _all _the fun out of it," Colin countered. "We can still have fun without breaking any laws. You don't want to get in trouble for hazing do you?"

"So wait, let me get this straight..." Rory began. "You're not making us break any laws because it's against the law to make us break the law?"

"Exactly," Colin confirmed.

"That logic is not logical," Rory shook her head.

"Well Hayden, would you rather us smuggle you into a strip club and make you jump on stage for an amateur performance? I'm sure it can be arranged."

Rory rolled her eyes at Colin but quickly realized that the gesture was lost behind the blindfold. "So what you're saying is there are strip clubs at this 'location'."

"Ooh, that narrows it down. We're not going to be in the woods or something. Ooh are we going to New York? That'd be fun." Julez piped in.

"Damn it McCrae," Logan slapped Colin upside the head. "Good going."

"You boys are so easy," Rosemary told them.

"I haven't heard the girls complain about that yet," Finn retorted.

The rest of the ride into the city was filled with pleasant banter. The girls constantly bugged the boys about their blindfolds, they knew everyone in the car and now they knew where they were going, so there was no need for them anymore, but the boys refused to let them uncover their eyes. Rory just figured they were being sore losers about the fact that the girls had tricked them into giving away information on their destination but she didn't push it; they had fragile egos despite their cocky facades.

The car finally pulled to a stop and the girls were led out of the car. "You can remove your blindfolds now," Colin informed them in a business-like tone. Rory untied the silk cloth covering her eyes to find herself standing in front of Central Park by Tavern on the Green. She, Rosemary, Juliette, and seven other slightly familiar faces whom she assumed were the other inititates stood in a circle around Colin. Logan and Finn were gone.

"Hello, I'm Phil Keoghan..." Colin began in a droll voice.

"No you're not, you're Colin McCrae," Rory spoke to him as though he were a small child. The other initiates that didn't know her close relationship with some of the senior members of the Brigade looked on in horror, sure that Colin wouldn't stand for such insolence.

"Shoosh Hayden. Let me do this ridiculous monologue so we can get started," was the only reprecussion. Rory just rolled her eyes and Colin continued, reluctantly getting back into character. "As I was saying, I'm Phil Keoghan and I'll be your host this evening. You're about to set out on a journey across New York City. You will have to complete various tasks along the way. Will you have the right combination of brains, brawn and teamwork to win The Amazing Race?"...

* * *

**Thanks for all the reviews for last chapter and keep 'em coming :)**


	3. To Completely, Thoroughly Embarrass You

**AN: Wow, look, I didn't totally forget about this story. I actually know exactly where I want to take this so even if updates are slow I promise that I won't give up on it. Here's part 1 of the intitation. Hope you enjoy. **

* * *

"As I was saying, I'm Phil Keoghan and I'll be your host this evening. You're about to set out on a journey across New York City. You will have to complete various tasks along the way. Will you have the right combination of brains, brawn and teamwork to win The Amazing Race?"... 

"Oh great, they're going to make us traipse all over the city on some stupid goose chase," Rosemary whined.

"Seriously, you think they'd know better than to force us to exert energy," Rory nodded in agreement.

A boy with dark brown hair, named Will, if Rory remembered correctly, spoke next. "I think it sounds like fun."

"Of course you would, you're not wearing heels," Juliet complained.

Colin looked at her exasperatedly, "I told you to put on sensible shoes before we left your dorm."

"These are the most sensible shoes I own; they're only kitten heels, and they have a sling back so they won't fall off."

"Whatever you say," Colin rolled his eyes. "Let's get this started. Here's your first clue." He handed a note card to Rosemary who was standing closest to him.

"Hey, wait. Don't we have to break up into teams?" someone asked.

"Huh?" Colin asked.

"Teams. We're supposed to break up into teams of two and race to the finish line. Don't you watch The Amazing Race?" someone else explained.

"I have better things to do with my time than watch celebrity hungry idiots roam around the globe performing stupid stunts, trying to make a few bucks," Colin replied.

Rosemary gasped. "You did _not_ just diss the Amazing Race. The Amazing Race is quality television, my friend."

"If you say so," he rolled his eyes. "Listen, I think you guys are taking this Amazing Race thing a little too far. You do realize that I'm not _actually_ Phil Keoghan and you're not _actually_ on TV, right?"

"Well if we're not doing this like the Amazing Race than how is it supposed to work?" Another initiate asked.

Colin looked at them all like they'd had too much to drink even though that portion of the evening wouldn't happen for hours. "It's a scavenger hunt; you get a clue, you go to the destination it points to, you do a stupid task like you're on a lame reality TV show and you get your next clue. It's a fairly simple concept."

"Oh? That's it?" someone asked, a little disappointment evident in their voice. They had expected more from the infamous Life and Death Brigade.

"We like to go easy on you newbies," Colin replied with a smirk.

"OK, come on guys, let's figure this clue out," Rory said, gathering the attention of the other initiates. They all gathered around Rosemary and tried to read the card.

"It's just a bunch of movie scenes," a boy pointed out. The card contained a list of movie characters and scenes they were in but it didn't say the names of the movies.

"Katie Morosky and Hubbell Gardner, that's _The Way We Were_," Rory pointed out.

"Molly Gunn was Brittany Murphy's character on _Uptown Girls,_" Juliet piped in.

"And 'Father Brian Finn and Anna Riley go for a jog in the park' is from the movie _Keeping the Faith._"

"OK so what's the common link?" Rory asked the group. "Oh the bridge!" she shouted out excitedly after a moment.

"What bridge?"

"The one in Central Park. It's where all these scenes take place."

"Right, Molly threw herself off the bridge when she found out Neal was sleeping with Roma," Juliet told them.

"It works for the others too. This scene from _Manhattan_ and the one from _You've Got Mail," _Rosemary confirmed.

"OK, looks like we've figured out our first destination. Let's go," the boy named Will directed.

"Go where?" one of the other female initiates asked.

"To the bridge."

"Which is…?"

"Oh, right. We should probably get directions."

"Excuse me," Rory stopped a man jogging by. "Can you tell us how to get to the bridge?"

"Which bridge?" he grunted, clearly annoyed by having his run interrupted.

"There's more than one?" someone in the background asked.

"The one from all the movies," Rory elaborated.

"Bow Bridge," he muttered, "Follow that path to Cherry Hill," the man pointed before stuffing his headphones back in his ears and trotting away.

The group of initiates as well as Colin headed in the direction the jogger had pointed them. Some of the boys began to run but quickly noticed that they were not being followed. They turned around to face the others and got dirty looks from the girls. There wasn't going to be any running in their presence.

When they finally made it to the bridge they spotted Finn waiting for them in a safari hat. "And they appear!" he greeted them.

"Finn!" Rosemary smiled at him.

"Finn? Who's Finn? I see no one by that name here, Love," Finn looked around as though attempting to see who Rosemary was talking to. "My name is Jeff," he finally introduced himself. "Jeff Probst. And this lovely creature standing before me is?"

"Finn!" she rolled her eyes at him.

"Oh, so _you're _Finn. Lovely to meet you darling," he grabbed her hand and brought it to his lips. She just shook her head at him.

"You know Jeff, the Survivor producers probably wouldn't like you flirting with your contestants," Juliet reminded him.

"Right you are,' he replied, straightening up. "Besides, we've got a game to play. So, gents and lovely ladies, split up; it's time for the reward challenge."

"What's the reward," Rory asked.

"Your next clue of course,' Finn replied.

"So the losers don't get a clue?"

"Of course they do, Love. You all work out the clues together."

"So there's really no incentive to win.'

"Geez Hayden, Are you always this big a pain in the ass?" Colin asked.

Rory turned to look at him. "Yes, McCrae; are you always this much of a stick in the mud?"

"Hey, I am not a stick in the mud," he pouted. Rory just glared at him. "Fine, maybe I can _sometimes_ be a _little bit_ of a stick in the mud, but you love me anyway, don't try and deny it."

"Aww, of course I love you Colin," she assured him, giving him a quick, platonic peck on the cheek. "Of course the evening's only beginning and I can't make any promises I'll feel the same way after whatever crap you make us go through tonight."

"Well then, maybe I should get another one of those kisses before we go any farther…just in case." She smiled at him and placed another quick kiss on his other cheek. "Good, now go make a fool out of yourself." He pushed her back towards Finn and he rest of the group.

Turning around, she gave Colin a dirty look. "Why do I suddenly get the feeling I'm going to want to take those kisses back once we hear what Finn has to say?"

"Too late, Indian giver, you can't take them back now," he smirked at her.

She sighed and turned back to Finn. "Are we quite ready?" Finn asked her with fake annoyance.

"Yes Finn," she assured him. "Go ahead."

"Alrighty then. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is…leap frog."

The group collectively looked at Finn like he was insane but he just smiled at them. "Leap frog?" Rosemary repeated.

"Yes."

"As in squatting down and jumping over people?" Juliet asked, wearily.

"Yep," his smile never dimmed.

"And the point of this is…?" Rosemary asked.

"To completely and thoroughly embarrass you of course, Love."

"Right…so we have to leap frog…?" Rory asked again, making sure this wasn't a joke. Finn nodded his head. "Over the bridge…?"

"And back," Finn added.

"And then you give us the next clue?'

"Yep."

Most of the initiates tried to pretend like the task wasn't completely ridiculous but the three girls let out a collective groan. "I'm adding this to the list of reasons I'm never going to go home with you, Finn," Rosemary warned him.

"And Colin, I might not be able to take back those kisses but I can make sure that you don't get anymore from Steph for a very long time," Rory added.

Colin just smirked, knowing it was an empty threat, it would be as much a punishment to his girlfriend as it was to him; she'd never go along with it. "In that case I want this to be worth the sacrifice so you guys better look really idiotic," he replied, playing along.

Rory rolled her eyes exasperatedly, before taking charge again. "Alright everybody, guys line up on the left, girls on the right. Let's get this over with."

The teams lined up and began the task. The boys had no problems getting into the groove of things and most of the girls managed to do a decent job of it as well, but Juliet was another story. The heels she was wearing were proving to be a very big hindrance to her leap forging abilities; she wasn't leaping so much as hobbling over people on her tip-toes.

"Just take the shoes off Julez," Rory finally suggested upon reaching the other side of the bridge.

"And let my bare feet touch New York City concrete? I'll get athlete's foot and my toe-nails will get all gross and the ladies at the nail salon will refuse to give me my pedicures," she whined in return.

"It doesn't even matter anymore, the guys are over halfway back already; we'll never win," one of the other girls, a short brunette named Natalie, whined.

"Sorry," Juliet pouted.

"It's fine, it's not like we get anything for winning anyhow; let's just hop on back," Rosemary said. The girls finally made it back over the bridge where the guys were already looking at the clue.

The girls looked over their shoulders and with one quick glance they instantly knew where to go. "Times Square," Rosemary told them.

"You sure?" a guy asked.

"Yes I'm sure…" she trailed off, not knowing his name.

"Trent," he supplied.

"Trent," she repeated so she wouldn't forget. "Haven't you ever heard of the Naked Cowboy?"

He shook his head 'no'. "Have any of you guys?" None of them had.

"The Naked Cowboy is a guy who sings in Times Square wearing nothing but a cowboy hat, boots, underwear and a guitar," Juliet explained with a smirk on her face, thinking of the image.

"Eww," the boys all exclaimed in unison. "That's not something we need to see on our public streets."

"Please, we all know none of you would be complaining if it was the Naked Cowgirl," Rory scolded them.

"Could she be a red headed cowgirl?" Finn asked hopefully.

"She doesn't exist Finn," Rosemary reminded him. "So she can look however you want a figment of your imagination to look."

"Good, then she'll look like you, Love." Rosemary just rolled her eyes.

"Hey guys," Natalie broke in. "How are we going to get to Times Square?"

"We'll walk, I guess," Rory responded.

"Hah, that's funny," Trent replied sarcastically. "Times Square is in midtown and we're uptown. That'll be one hell of a walk; especially in those shoes," he pointed at Juliet's feet.

"Well then I guess we'll have to take cabs….only crap, I left my purse in the limo."

"Me too," Rosemary and Juliet both confirmed.

"Hey, my wallet's missing." Everyone looked at all of the other members of the group, suddenly realizing that all their money and credit cards had been taken away without them even knowing.

"Oh wait!" Will said suddenly. "Aha, bingo!" He pulled a twenty loose from his pocket.

"Hey, where'd you get that? You're not supposed to have any form of currency on you." Colin tried to reach over and grab the bill from Will's hands but Rory swatted him away.

"Uh, uh uh! You snooze you lose, McCrae."

"Fine, it's not like twenty bucks is going to get you very far in this city. There's no way in hell you can get the 10 of you cabs to Times Square for that much money."

"Maybe not, but we can get the 10 of us subway passes," Rory reminded him.

"The subway?" Juliet asked wide eyed.

"Julez, you know we love you just the way you are but for once can you stop acting like such a prissy, girly-girl and just suck it up?" Rosemary pleaded. Juliet reluctantly agreed and the group started moving back the way they had come.

Colin grumbled incoherently under his breath and followed the group out of the park and to the nearest subway stop.

They finally made their way into midtown and got off the subway at 8th and Broadway.

"Ugh, remind me never to step foot in any form of public transportation ever again," Juliet moaned. She had been pretty good about not complaining for the duration of the ride but she couldn't keep her mouth shut any longer.

"It wasn't that bad," Rory replied.

"I'm going to have to shower for a week before I feel clean again, and I swear that homeless guy grabbed my ass."

"Actually, I think that was me," Rosemary admitted as they wandered around Times Square looking for an LBD member with their next clue. "It was a little crowded in there, I didn't mean to."

"Oh thank god," Juliet breathed a sigh of relief at the knowledge that she had not been man-handled on the subway. "Oh look over there," Juliet pointed towards the Virgin Megastore where Logan stood, conspicuously checking out passing girls.

The group approached him hesitantly, not looking forward to finding out what embarrassment awaited them in the very center of the world's most bustling metropolis.

"And who are you?" Rory asked Logan when they'd reached him.

"I'm crushed, Ace. 10 years of friendship and you forget me just like that?" Logan feigned hurt.

Rory sighed deeply, "I meant what idiotic character have you been elected to play in this elaborate scheme to humiliate us?"

"Oh, that. I'm Ryan Seacrest."

"Of course you are. Same enormous ego, same obsession with your hair and you both love to get manicures. I should have known," she teased him.

"Hey! That manicure thing was supposed to be a secret," he pouted.

"Well I felt like sharing the humiliation since you're about to…oh no!" Rory said suddenly with fear in her eyes. "Not gonna happen, Logan. Not in a million years.

"What?" he said innocently.

"If you're Ryan Seacrest than that makes this the…"

"American Idol stop," he confirmed with a smirk.

"There is no way in hell you are getting me to sing in the middle of Times Square."

"I didn't make the rules, Ace. I'm just following them."

"I swear to god if you make me do this I'll make sure no girl at Yale will ever have sex with you again," she threatened.

"And how exactly do you plan on doing that?" he asked with a grin, calling out her bluff.

She just smirked and instead of saying anything she clapped her hands together.

"The Clap's treatable. Nothing a few doses of Penicillin can't take care of." He shoved a microphone at her with one hand and a hat with pieces of scrap paper at her with the other. "Time to pick your poison."

"I'm not doing this," she insisted yet again. She looked behind her at the other initiates looking for a little support. They all looked as terrified of this public humiliation as her. "See, they're against it too," she pointed at them.

"But you're fans are waiting," he nodded his head at something behind her and she turned to face the jumbo-tron.

She let out a tiny yelp and ducked behind Logan. "Tell me you didn't," she pleaded.

"We didn't, but you sure are gullible, Ace."

She stood up straight and glowered at him before reluctantly pulling a piece of paper from the hat and unfolding it. "Oh great."

Logan took the paper from her and smiled mischievously. "Very nice choice Miss Hayden. Now if only you had your Chilton uniform on you, it'd be perfect." He bent down and picked up a boom box and pressed play. _Hit Me Baby One More Time_ began streaming through the speakers and Logan once again held the microphone out to her.

"Put that thing away, Huntzberger," she warned him.

"Now where would the fun be in that?"

Meanwhile one of the other initiates had a sudden idea. "Maybe if we put a hat or something down in front of her we could get some people to drop money in it to help us get to our next destination." It was at that moment that the words started and Rory began, reluctantly, to sing. "Never mind," the initiate took the suggestion back as soon as the first awful note came from her mouth.

Rory still refused to take hold of the microphone so Logan just held it up in front of her face. "Come on, Ace. Move those hips; make Brittany proud." She glared at him even harder and continued her attempts at singing. The song finally came to and end and she breathed a sigh of relief. "Wow," Logan told her. "I think you just redefined tone-deaf. We should get a picture of this so we can send it to Webster's and they can put it in their dictionary."

"You _will_ pay for this, Huntzberger. Maybe not today, and maybe not tomorrow; but soon, and for the rest of your life."

"It's good to know you won't forget me," he laughed. "Now who's our next victim?" Will was the next in line and he chose the song _Dude Looks Like a Lady_ by Aerosmith. Juliet had to sing The Four Season's _December, 1963 _ and Rosemary got _Tainted Love_.

All the initiates except Trent had gone. Logan tried to hold back his laughter as the 6'1" man with the build of a football player came forward to pick the last song out of the hat. Trent unfolded the piece of paper and let out a frustrated sigh. "And what song will you be singing this evening?" Logan asked him, though he knew very well what song was written on the paper.

Trent handed his choice over to Logan. "Ah good choice my boy, good choice." Logan patted him on the back and turned on the music. _Like a Virgin_ began playing and the entire group tried to refrain from laughing as Trent's voice joined Madonna's.

When the singing had finally stopped and the laughter had died down Logan turned to Colin. "So my friend, who do you think our next American Idol should be?"

"I think it's pretty clear who our winner is; congratulations Trent," Colin replied. Logan nodded in agreement and handed the clue card over to Trent.

"And the nightmare continues," Rosemary mumbled as they gathered around the clue to figure out where their next mortification would occur.

* * *

**Psst...leave a review**


	4. Bite Your Tongue

**AN: Phew, finally done. This chapter took forever to write. **

**I want to clear up a question someone had in the last chapter- the initiates are all working together in this scavenger hunt. They had to break into teams for some of the clues but it was just for the sake of the particular task and at the end they all got the clue and worked together. This scavenger hunt is based off what I had to do for the group I joined and I had a lot of fun doing it so that's why it is the way it is, sorry if it's confusing at all.**

* * *

"_And the nightmare continues,' Rosemary mumbled as they gathered around the clue to figure out where the mortification would happen next._

The card had one sentence on it, not even a sentence, really- just a clause: "Frequented by Bowzer from Sha-na-na and Arthur Fonzerrelli."

"Bowzer from Sha-na-na and Arthur Fonzerrelli?" Rory repeated, "that sounds familiar." The entire group was now mumbling the phrase to themselves repeatedly as the words began to form a familiar beat.

"Oh I got it!" one of the initiates, Jake, spoke up. "It's a line from The Chanukah song. Now if I can just remember what Sandler had to say about Bowzer and the Fonz…" he trailed off, trying to remember the entire line. After a second of reminiscing the words finally came to him. "They ate at the Carnegie Deli!" he exclaimed.

"Ohh right, I remember now, 'Guess who ate at the Carnegie Deli; Bowser from Sha-na-na and Arthur Fonzerrelli,'" Will chimed in, singing the line.

"So I guess we know where we're going next," Rory said. "Isn't the Carnegie right here in Times Square somewhere?"

"No, that's the Roxy. But the Carnegie is only maybe ten blocks away; it should be walkable," Trent corrected her. He must have spent a lot of time in Manhattan as he seemed to know the layout of the city pretty well. He led the group off in the direction of the Deli.

"I wonder what they're going to make us do next. I mean, serenading all of Times Square was pretty humiliating, it'll be hard to top that," an initiate commented along the way.

"Well maybe they'll be nice to us this time," Juliet suggested. The entire group stopped walking to stare at her. "Or maybe not," she said, realizing just how slim the possibility of that really was. They all resumed walking.

"Well maybe it won't be something humiliating; maybe it'll be something really hard, or something really gross. Eww, we're going to a restaurant, what if they make us eat something really gross off the menu," Rosemary predicted.

"Yeah, Fear Factor style. This does seem to be following a clear 'reality TV show' theme."

"We're going to the Carnegie Deli, what do you think they're going to make us eat? Pastrami on rye? Oh no!" Will responded sarcastically.

"Ooh that sounds yummy, you really think they'd feed us pastrami on rye- with spicy mustard of course, because I'm _really_ hungry," Rory said.

"You know, my people definitely got it right when they invented noodle kugel, potato latkes and matzo ball soup, but I'll admit that they're also crazy enough to eat things like liver and pickled herring and all sorts of other gross things, so this Fear Factor idea might be right on track," Jake acknowledged, thinking off all the gross Jewish food his grandparents loved.

"Eww, they better not make us eat pickled herring; I am so no wasting my allotted daily caloric intake on pickled herring," Juliet whined.

"What daily caloric intake?" Colin asked. "I can't remember the last time I saw you eat _anything_. If we do force you to eat pickled herring you should probably thank us for providing your body with some much needed nutrients."

"How many times have I told you that I am _not_ eating until I marry a gorgeous but very poor man…" Juliet began but she was immediately cut off by Colin, Rory, _and_ Rosemary.

"Who will sign and iron clad pre-nup. Then you will get very, very fat but he won't ever leave you because he'll be cut off without a penny and die in a trailer park. We know." The group finished the very familiar story. Juliet insisted that her metabolism didn't accept food and refused to eat until she'd snagged herself a man for life.

The initiates, accompanied by Colin, finally reached the Deli and made their way inside where Robert, one of the senior Brigaders awaited their arrival. Sure enough. to everyone's dismay (most especially Juliet's,) Robert introduced himself as Joe Rogan, host of Fear Factor, and he stood next to a table with ten covered platters.

The group of initiates made disgusted faces before reluctantly walking up and each standing in front of a platter. Rory chose the platter on the end, right next to Robert and as Colin watched on, he could tell this made Robert very happy.

"Hey there, Rory," Robert greeted her. "It's _very_ good to see you." He eyed her up and down.

"Hey Robert, good to see you too," Rory replied politely.

Colin rolled his eyes at Rory's cluelessness- she never seemed to realize when guys were hitting on her. Rory wasn't exactly the most secure person in her sexuality, which was in stark contrast to the rest of the group of friends who were all a bit on the promiscuous side, or at least Colin and Stephanie were before they got their acts together and started dating exclusively.

Colin moved his gaze from Rory to Robert and sent a pointed glare the other man's way. Colin and Robert were friends for the most part but he couldn't stand it when Robert hit on Rory. Colin was fiercely protective of the girl; of course he was nothing compared to Logan when it came to Rory, but if Logan took on the protective big brother roll, he and Finn were like protective cousins. The point was- Colin would never trust Robert with Rory and he _liked_ the guy; Finn and Logan thought Robert was an ass to begin with and Colin often feared for Robert's life when Logan caught him hitting on Rory.

Robert caught Colin's gaze and immediately stepped back, sending Colin his best "innocent" look. "OK initiates," he addressed the group, "it's time for your stunt. Uncover your trays."

"Please not pickled herring, please not pickled herring," Juliet chanted as the silver lids came off the platters all at the same time. "Well at least it's not pickled herring but I still think I'm going to puke," she added when she saw what was on the plate.

"You mean dry heave," Rosemary corrected her. "You'd actually have to have food in your stomach to puke." Juliet just glared at Rosemary then turned her attention back to the cow's tongue that stared up at her from her plate.

"People seriously eat this voluntarily?" Rory asked dumbfounded.

"Yep. It's my grandmother's favorite," Jake confirmed. "I could never bring myself to try it though."

"Well it looks like now is your chance," Trent told him.

Rory looked up at Robert. "You're seriously going to make me put this tongue in my mouth?"

Robert glanced towards Colin who was still looking at him. He returned his gaze to Rory and bit back the suggestive comment that was in his head. "Rules are rules," he told her instead.

Rory glared at him through narrow eyes. "I'm not so sure I really want to be in the LDB this badly."

"Just bite your tongue, Hayden."

"I'm not even going to acknowledge the fact that you just said that," Rory told him, shaking her head at the complete awfulness of the pun. She took a deep breath, picked up her knife and fork and began reluctantly shoving pieces of tongue into her mouth, trying desperately not to throw it back up. When she'd finally finished she looked around to see that most everyone else was also done, or nearly so- except of course, one person. Juliet stood, knife hanging in mid air above the tongue as her hand shook manically.

"I can't do it. I'm sorry, I just can't do it," she mumbled.

Rosemary turned to look at Robert. "You can't seriously expect her to eat that?" You know she'll barely touch _lettuce_."

Robert sighed, knowing Rose spoke the truth. The initiates would never make it past this stop if he waited for Juliet to eat her tongue. He walked over to her, took her knife and fork, cut a tiny piece of tongue off and handed the fork back to her. "If you can just force that down we'll give you the clue," he told her. "Bathroom's that way," he added as an afterthought, pointing towards the lady's room.

Juliet looked down at her plate miserably, picked up her fork and slowly lifted the tongue to her mouth. She shoved it in and swallowed. Her eyes went suddenly wide and in an instant she was lunging towards the bathroom, thankful that Robert had had the foresight to point it out to her beforehand.

"Alright, I guess that means it's time for your next clue," Robert replied with a chuckle.

He handed the clue card over to Rory who was still looking a little sick from her tongue eating experience. She looked down at the card, reading it out loud.

"**I believe that love is the greatest thing in the world; that it alone can overcome hate; that right can and will triumph over might."**

"Very poetic," she commented. "Alright let's go."

"Go where?" Will asked.

"To Rockefeller Center," she responded as though it should be obvious.

"How do you get Rockefeller Center out of that?"

"It's the last line of John D. Rockefeller's credo. A little ironic coming from this group, I must say."

"You're a freak, Hayden," Colin told her. "That was supposed to be the hardest clue…and despite the fact that I should know better than to ask this-how is it ironic?"

"Oh come on, Colin; '_I believe that thrift is essential to well ordered living and that economy is a prime requisite of a sound financial structure, whether in government, business or personal affairs_.' When has anyone in this group believed that thrift is essential to anything? Hell, even I don't believe that and I'm the most fiscally responsible of all of you."

"Are you serious? You have his whole freaking credo memorized? Freak," he teased.

"_I believe in the supreme worth of the individual and in his right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness_…" she began.

"OK Ror, we don't need to hear it," Rosemary rolled her eyes. "We already know you've memorized everything that you have ever seen in the pages of a textbook. We're all duly impressed, now let's get a move on- I'd like to make it to the alcohol sometime today."

"You sound like Finn," Rory told her with a laugh.

"You take that back!"

"Never"

"I don't think I can be friends with you anymore," Rosemary pouted.

"You'll get over it."

"Yeah, you're right," Rosemary admitted. "Just give me- 5,4,3,2,1.." she counted down. "OK, I'm over it," she hugged Rory.

"What are we waiting for people," Rory asked once she'd finished her hug. She looked at them like they hadn't been waiting on her and Rosemary. "Let's move- we've got places to go."

"People to see," Juliet put in.

"Things to do," Rosemary added, as the group filed out of the restaurant and back into the streets of New York.

After a walking for a while, the group finally spotted Radio City Music Hall and they moved towards it, finally reaching the plaza. They walked down the steps into the plaza to reach the ice rink where they found a girl dressed in a black and white polka dot dress waiting for them. Her blonde hair was flat ironed with a bright red head band holding the pin straight locks off her face. This was Stephanie- Colin's girlfriend and one of Rory's best friends; she completed the core group of friends: Rory, Logan, Colin, Finn, and Stephanie.

Steph addressed the group in a faux British accent. "Ello. I'm Twiggy. Welcome to this installment of America's Next Top Model. I hope you're all ready for today's challenge."

"Oh great, more humiliation," Trent said, taking in the scene around him.

"Hey, anything's better than having to eat more tongue," Juliet replied

"Speak for yourself; I'd eat a hundred tongues before I'd sing "Like a Virgin" to all of New York again."

Stephanie continued with her intro. "Now, as you all know, grace is an exceptionally important quality for a model to possess. For today's challenge you will have to demonstrate your grace on ice…" she motioned to the ice rink behind her, "…by doing the hokey pokey."

The group let out a collective groan. The hokey pokey. On ice. In Rockefeller Center. On the bright side, with the crowd that was assembled there was bound to be an MD around for when one of them cracked their skull open.

Juliet looked down at her feet. She didn't want to be the one to ruin another task but there was no way in hell she could hokey pokey on ice in those shoes. Before she could say anything, Colin shoved something in her face. "I thought you could use these."

"What's this?" she asked, looking at the bright pink blob in his hand.

"Socks."

"Socks?"

"Well, they're kind of halfway between socks and slippers. See, they've got the little grip-y things on the bottom, I picked them up for you when we were in Times Square," he told her.

She smiled and laughed. "My hero." She slipped the socks on her feet and handed her shoes over to Colin. "Hold these for me," she requested with a smile and a playful bat of her eyelashes. He took the shoes from her with a shake of his head.

"Ok Steph, I'm ready," she turned back to the blonde with renewed exuberance. She was determined to throw herself into this task completely. She was tired of bringing everyone down, and as much as the others protested the tasks as she did, she knew they were mostly joking around and that they really were in the spirit of the event.

The group filed out onto the ice. "Break a leg," Steph told them in her normal voice.

"Seriously?" Rory asked her. "You're seriously sending us out onto the ice to do a little jig and telling us to break a leg?"

"Oops," Steph replied with a giggle. "Guess I didn't really think that one out. How about I just wish you good luck instead, girlie."

"'Good luck' will do just fine," Rory confirmed, chuckling at her friend.

"OK, everybody," Steph said once the group had formed a circle on the ice. "Put you right leg in," several of the initiates rolled their eyes but all did as they were told. "Put your right foot out."

Again they all listened to directions but as Rory put her right foot out she slipped on the ice and fell face first to the ground with a grunt. "I'm fine," she mumbled.

Upon hearing that Rory was not hurt, Steph continued singing the song to the group.

"Put your right foot in and shake it all about." This undertaking caused the loss of several more initiates. "Do the Hokey Pokey and turn yourself about," at this point only Trent, Will and Juliet were left standing. "That's what it's all about," Steph finished with dramatic flair. Apparently Will thought this dramatic flair was a necessary part of the dance and as he threw his hands up in the air he lost his balance and fell, sliding a few feet and taking Trent down with him.

"Yes! Last one standing," Juliet cried out gleefully, pumping her hand in the air. It didn't last long as Rosemary reached out for her leg and pulled her down with the others, causing both girls to start laughing hysterically.

After the giggles had subsided the group began pulling themselves up off the ice and heading back to Stephanie and Colin where they received their next clue.

According to the card they needed to go to "One of the seven wonders of the modern world, ascended by the eighth wonder of the world."

"Rudyard Kipling called Milford Sound the eight wonder of the world." Rory supplied.

"Wasn't there an Opera 'The Eight Wonder' about the Sydney Opera House," someone else suggested.

"_Sephora's_" Steph chimed in.

Colin laughed at his girlfriend's antics. "What, I love that place; make-up galore. Seriously, it's _my_ eighth wonder," she defended.

"Don't you already know where we have to go next?" Rory asked the blonde.

"Yep," Steph replied with a gloat-y grin on her face.

"And is it a _Sephora_?" Rory asked with a roll of her eyes.

"No, but we _should_ go to _Sephora_. We'll go tomorrow. All us girls, total shopping day," she added giddily.

"Ooh can we stop by _Chloé_? I need a new purse," Rosemary suggested.

"No you don't, you have like, fifty purses," Juliet reminded her.

"So? That doesn't mean I don't need a new one. I _always_ need a new one. You can _never_ have too many purses."

"King Kong," Trent said, seemingly out of nowhere

"King Kong?" Rosemary repeated.

"Yeah, after they captured him, they advertised him as the eighth wonder of the world," he replied.

"Oh, we're back to talking about that?" she asked.

The guys shook their heads at the girls; did they ever think about anything but shopping? "OK well he's the only thing we've listed so far that's in New York and I don't think they're sending us to Australia or New Zealand, so I suggest we follow this Kong idea," Will suggested.

"Well then, I think it's pretty obvious where we're going. Kong climbed up the Empire State building. That's probably the most likely place here to be considered a wonder of the modern world," Trent supplied.

"Well I guess we're headed to the Empire State Building. How far away is that?"

"It can't be that far, it's on Fifth Ave. and we're already there so we don't have to go across, only down."

"Yeah but it's in the 30's somewhere and we're currently at 48th street. It's probably about fifteen blocks or so. Still, I think we can walk it."

"Fifteen blocks?" Rory whined. "There better be one hell of a party waiting for us after this."

After almost half an hour of walking the group finally made it to the Empire State building. Rory was afraid it was nothing more than a beautiful mirage, like an oasis in the desert, but it was real. They crammed into to the elevators and made their way to the observation desk at the top.

Awaiting their arrival was Seth, another member of the Brigade who sometimes hung out with Logan, Colin, Finn and the others. He was dressed in a blue suit.

"Hello, I'm Alex Tribeck and this iiiiis Jeapordy," he announced in his best game show host voice.

"Ooh, trivia. Rory's smart, I nominate her to answer all the questions," Rosemary pushed her friend forward.

"I think they expect us _all_ to participate," Rory reminded her.

"Fine," Rose pouted.

"Today's categories are: Horticulture, Precious Gems, Famous Dates in History, Latin Phrases, and Founding Fathers. Juliet, would you like to be the first to choose a category?" Seth suggested.

Juliet sighed audibly but chose a category. "I'll take Precious Gems for 200, Alex," she said with an eye roll.

"The Life and Death Brigade's signature gem stone." Oh great, it was LDB trivia, she wasn't even technically, supposed to know they existed before today, how did they expect her to know which gem they chose to symbolize them? She looked around at the group, searching for some hint or clue, hoping one of them knew. Her eyes eventually traveled back to Seth and as they did, she noticed a glint off his wrist. Taking a closer look she noticed his cuff links- his _emerald_ cuff links.

"Emeralds," she said excitedly.

Seth smirked at her. "Could you please phrase your response in the form of a question," he told her.

Juliet rolled her eyes but rephrased her answer. "What are emeralds?"

"That is correct. Emeralds symbolize faithfulness. As members, you will be expected to show your loyalty to not only to the Brigade itself but to the members-past, present and future. In return you can expect other members to be there for you in times of need. We are your family now.

"Rory," he called, inviting her up to answer the next question. "Please pick one of the remaining categories."

"I'll take Famous Dates in History."

Seth proceeded to tell her the next question. "The year in which the LDB was founded."

Rory glanced around helplessly searching for the answer. Something drew her eyes to the wall just above Seth's head. There was a digital clock there that seemed very much out of place; it also seemed to be set in military time. Upon further investigation she realized that it wasn't a time at all- it was a year. She smiled and spoke. "What is 1896"

He nodded his head in confirmation. "For over five generations your ancestors and family members have partaken in the customs of the Life and Death Brigade, vowing to live life to its fullest. You are entering into a long line of tradition and you are expected to share in these traditions and to contribute your own ideas to the development of new traditions for future generations.

"Jake," he called forth the next initiate. "Please choose a category."

Jake immediately noticed the flower on Seth's lapel. "Horticulture."

"Very well. The flower of the Life and Death Brigade," he predictably recited.

"What is the white rose?" Jake answered.

"Very good. The white rose's meaning is two-fold. First, is secrecy- as you are most likely aware, the Life and Death Brigade is a secret society. You are now privy to privileged information, we expect you to protect this secret; it is yours to keep now.

"The second meaning is youthfulness. The Life and Death Brigade celebrates youthfulness. Membership comes to you now, in the prime of your life, reminding you not to lose the child within. Never stop living life to the fullest." He called Rosemary forth next. She chose the Founding Fathers category.

"The founder of the Life and Death Brigade."

Rosemary thought for a moment. The other's seemed to find their answers on or around Seth, perhaps he, himself, was the answer to this question. But suddenly Colin took a step closer to Seth and winked at Rosemary.

"Who is McCrae?" Rosemary suggested.

"That is correct. Andrew McCrae founded the Life and Death Brigade in an attempt to find a support system in his ever changing world. As he and his friends began their collegiate lives they found themselves drifting away from family and loved ones. They began living more and more in their books and less and less in the real world. He wanted to form an organization that would remind him that the world was about more than facts and numbers; it was about taking chances and having fun.

"Will, please step forward to answer the final question. Your category is Latin Phrases…" Will nodded and Seth read him his question. "The motto of the Life and Death Brigade."

Will breathed a sigh of relief- an easy question. It had been written on all of their invitations, after all. "What is _In Omnia Paratus"_

Seth confirmed Will's correct answer. "In Omnia Paratus is Latin for 'ready for anything.' It is meant to remind us to always have an open mind and to be prepared to take advantage of all of life's opportunities. The Life and Death Brigade awaits you, are you ready?" He looked directly at Will, obviously expecting a response.

"I'm ready," Will confirmed.

Seth turned his gaze to the other initiates. "I'm ready," they each replied in turn.

"Very well, please proceed back to the ground floor where the cars will be waiting to take you to your final stop."

They took the elevators back to the lobby and exited the building where two limos were indeed waiting for them. They were about to get in when Colin stopped them. "Blindfolds on," he ordered them.

Rory turned to him. "You've got to be kidding me."

"Nope," he smirked at her. She sighed, pulled the blindfold from her pocket and tied it over her eyes. Colin guided her and the others into the car.

They drove for about fifteen or twenty minutes before the limo came to a stop. Colin helped them back out of the cars, lined them up and guided them single file into a building. Once they had stopped walking Colin had them all turn to their right and remove their blind folds. They stood in front of a banister which had ten pieces of tape with each of their names written on it. Attached to each piece of tape was a strand of yarn. The yarn spread all across the room, intertwined with the other pieces of yarn forming a giant, brightly colored, woolen cobweb. Dispersed throughout the room were ten members of the LDB, presumably each at the opposite end of a piece of yarn. They were told that the string would lead them to their sponser who would help them in their induction to the LDB.

"Oh goody, the fun's not over," Rory remarked dryly. They all walked around the banister and detached their yarn and began to follow it through the labyrinth that had been created. Rory, like the others, made her way over, under, and through the maze of string for what seemed like ever. Every time she passed a member of the brigade sitting smugly in their chair she would give them the evil eye. Finally, after what seemed forever she reached the end of her string and there, waiting for her was Logan.

"Hey there, Ace. Happy to see me?" he asked haughtily.

"No," she snapped at him. "Although I am glad to see the end of this damn piece of string."

"Someone's cranky," he pointed out.

She glared at him. "I have been traipsing all over this city for hours. I'm never going to walk again, you're going to need to get me a wheel chair and _push_ me around from now on. And there better be some food at this party, Huntzberger- tongue doesn't count."

Laughing, he replied, "I think a proper welcome to the LDB involves some food that was never in the mouth of another animal."

He stood up to give her a hug but before he could she quickly sat down in his vacated seat. "Hah! My chair now," she smiled up at him.

"Yeah, yeah, just don't get too comfy there. We've got a party to go to. Speaking of which, those clothes just aren't gonna cut it," he informed her.

"But you took all my stuff with you when we got out of the limo, so unless you want me to knit something from all this yarn- which would first require giving me knitting lessons- this is it," she motioned to her casual clothes

"Well Ace, I'm sure you'd look fabulous in something out of your Yarn Barn collection but I think we can do a little better," a white box wrapped in an emerald green bow seemed to emerge out of nowhere and he passed it to Rory.

"For me?" she smiled at him.

"For you," he confirmed.

"Yay! I love prezzies!" she said excitedly, jumping up off the chair.

He smiled at her exuberance. "Just so long as you're appreciative," he joked. "Now go on in the back room and get changed. Steph brought some make-up and other girlie things to make sure you look absolutely smashing."

"Hey, I always look smashing," she pouted, crossing her arms over her chest defiantly.

"Of course you do, Ace," he replied sincerely. "No, shoo. Go get pretty…" she glared at him. "pretty…er than you already are- which is pretty darn pretty, I might add," he corrected.

"Damn straight!" She smiled and then bounced off towards the back room to get ready, with her new dress in tow.

* * *

**AN: OK, so I know very little Rogan interaction but I wanted to introduce some characters and show some of the group dynamic, and also let them have some fun before I turn their worlds upside down and bring on the angst. Next chapter things will start to progress and you'll start to see exactly how Rory and Logan got to where they were in chapter 1. I should have some free time in the near future so if you're nice to me with reviews I might use it to spend more of that free time writing for you ;) I hope you enjoyed the chapter, let me know what you thought.**


	5. Fake It Till You Make It

**AN: OK, so I was going to wait until tomorrow to post this because I wasn't happy with the number of reviews and then I realized that I was spoiled and that most people would kill for over 20 reviews on a chapter and I decided to stop being an ungrateful wretch and to be thankful and nice and give you this chapter now. I hope you enjoy it. **

* * *

"OK, hand it over, girlie," Steph said as soon as Rory walked into the dressing room. 

Rory looked at the blonde girl like she was crazy, and in all actuality she was a little crazy but she wouldn't be Stephanie if she wasn't. "Hand what over?"

"Duh, the box." Rory looked from the box to Stephanie, back to the box before reluctantly handing it over. "Good, now take this," Steph handed her a new box.

"What's this?"

"It's your dress," Steph said matter-of-factly.

"I thought that was my dress," she replied, pointing to the box she'd just handed to Stephanie.

"That's the dress Logan bought for you. Do you really want to wear the dress Logan bought for you?"

"Why not? Logan has freakishly good fashion sense for a guy."

"Yes, but Logan also thinks of you as a little kid. I've seen the dress Logan picked for you. It's gorgeous and it will look gorgeous on you but if you shrunk it down a few sizes it would also look gorgeous on a twelve year old. Do you want to wear a dress made for a twelve year old or do you want to wear a dress made for a woman?"

Rory rolled her eyes at her friend but opened the box anyway. She pulled the dress out, took one look at it and put it back down again. "No." She held her hands out to receive the other box back.

Steph smirked at the brunette girl standing before her with outstretched hands but made no motion to return Logan's dress. "Funny, that's what Logan said when I suggested he buy it for you."

"Well can you blame him?"

"Please, you're acting like it's some crazy, slutty dress. It's not slutty, it's classy; it's Vera-freaking-Wang for gods sake. And yeah, maybe it is a little low cut…"

Rory cut her off. "A _little_ low cut?" she asked incredulously. "They don't call them _plunging_ neck lines for nothing, Steph."

"I've seen _way_ plungier neck lines before hun, this is nothing."

"First of all, 'plungier'- not a word. Second of all, I'm not wearing that dress. I wouldn't even be able to wear a bra underneath it and I don't do bra-less."

"Oh come on. You're twenty years old. Your boobs will never be as perky as they are today; embrace the perkiness, Rory."

"OK, please tell me you did _not_ just say the words 'embrace the perkiness' in reference to my breasts."

"Come on," Steph coaxed. "It'll piss Logan off. I know how you _love_ to piss Logan off."

Rory sighed and looked back down at the dress. "I'll try it on but I make no promises," she relented.

"That's my girl," Stephanie told her with a big grin. "I just love it when I'm a bad influence on you."

Rory stepped behind one of the many changing screens that had been placed around the room and re-emerged a few minutes later clad in a beautiful, classic, black dress. The v-neck plunged down to the satin ribbon at the dress's empire waistline. The dress hugged her curves down to her knees where it fanned out in a tulle material, creating a mermaid silhouette.

"Damn girl, you look hot." Steph smiled at her.

"I don't know," Rory replied self consciously. "You don't think it's a bit much? Maybe I should just try on Logan's dress."

"You'll have to find Logan's dress first- and then you will have to wrestle it away from me because I am not letting you out of this dress with out a fight, missy. You look way too hot…oh but before I forget, you might want to put some of this on." She handed something to Rory.

"What's this?"

"Double sided tape…to avoid a wardrobe malfunction. We're aiming for 'classically sexy', not 'Janet-Jackson-at-the-Superbowl slutty.'"

Rory took the tape and secured the dress to her body. Steph took the curling iron and gave Rory a few curls, cascading around her face, applied some light make-up and gave Rory the 'good-to-go.'"

Rory began to slink away towards the room with the party but Steph stopped her. "OK, you are not going out there like that. You look way too awesome to ruin it with your wall flower attitude, missy. Now stand up tall and go out there like the beautiful, confident woman you are…and if you're not confident, well then that's why they created the phrase, 'fake it till you make it.'

Rory took a deep breath, stood up straight, and walked out into the party with a smile plastered on her face. She wanted to feel confident in this dress, she really did. She wanted to be comfortable showing her body off and getting stares from guys. She was going to follow Steph's advice; she was going to 'fake it till she made it.' Scanning the room, she spotted Logan standing by the bar and went to approach him.

She snuck up directly behind him, and stood on her tippy toes so her mouth was right by his ear. "Hi," she chirped loudly.

Logan jumped. "Geez, Ace, wear a bell, would ya?" he turned around to face her and as soon as he saw her he was sliding his tuxedo jacket off his own shoulders and wrapping it protectively around hers. "What the _hell_ are you wearing? That is _not _the dress I put in that box I gave you."

"Nope, this is the dress in the box Stephanie gave me," she replied matter-of-factly, suddenly forgetting that she had been just as wary of the low cut neck line as Logan obviously was.

"Good damn her. I am going to murder that girl," he mumbled. What was that girl thinking putting Rory in something so revealing? He would swear she probably did it just to spite him.

"What's the matter, don't you like it?" she asked facetiously, taking his jacket off and spinning around in the dress.

"Do I like it?" he asked incredulously. "Rory, I can practically see your belly button through the neckline. Now cover the hell up and go back and change into an appropriate dress."

Rory rolled her eyes. "You can't come even close to seeing my belly button in this dress and even if you could, I'm pretty sure that's not the part of my anatomy you'd object to. I'm a big girl Logan, and I can wear whatever dress I see fit," she replied defensively.

"Rory, one wrong move and your…" he motioned with his hands trying to find a word for her breasts that would not be completely traumatic to him, "girly parts will be exposed for all the world to see."

Rory sighed angrily. "You can say 'tits' in front of me, Logan," she yelled. "You won't offend my virgin ears- in fact my ears aren't virgin nor is any other part of me, so stop treating me like a child."

Logan cringed visibly. He knew she'd had sex with Dean but he sure as hell didn't like to think about it, and his Ace did _not_ have 'tits.' She was way too innocent and naive to be associated with a word as crude as that.

"I'm not treating you like a kid, Ace but do you have any idea what guys are going to think when they see you in that dress? They're going think 'damn she's hot. I wonder what I have to do to get her in the sack.' I know because that's what _I'd_ think if I saw some girl walking around looking like you."

"Right, if you saw some _other_ girl walking around looking like me. Because _I'm_ not allowed to look sexy. Hell, I'm not allowed to be associated with the word sex at all. God forbid some guy looks at me like I'm beautiful, and sexy. Did it ever occur to you that maybe I _want_ to look beautiful and sexy? Maybe I want to _feel_ beautiful and sexy? Because to tell you the truth Logan, I haven't felt that way in a _really_ long time, not since before…him, and I'm sick of it. I'm sick of not feeling pretty enough or good enough and if letting guys ogle my goodies will help me feel that way again than God damn it, Logan, I will let them ogle," when she'd finished her rant she threw Logan's jacket back at him and stormed off.

He sighed and turned back to the bar for a drink. What the hell had just happened? Didn't she understand that he was just looking out for her? He'd just give a few minutes to calm down then he'd go check on her. He took a couple of shots from the bar to help himself settle down. He knew that that dress wasn't really that revealing at all. It's not like the dress was one which necessarily gave guys the impression they _could_ sleep with her, but it was definitely one which would make them want to. He didn't want guys thinking about her that way; he didn't want some guy to come along and break her again, like Dean had, before she'd even really been put back together. He looked down at his watch and saw that it had been almost ten minutes since she'd walked away; just enough to hopefully make her receptive to him.

He found her out on a balcony over looking Central Park. "Ace," he said as he approached her. She didn't make any indication that she'd even heard him. "Ace," he tried again. "Please just talk to me."

"What's wrong with me, Logan?" she asked, without turning to look at him.

"What?"

"Why don't they want me?"

"Who?" he asked again.

She turned to face him. "Dean, Jess, every guy on the face of the planet," she replied exasperatedly.

"Are you serious?" he asked her. She nodded her head. "They want you, Ace. Believe me, they _all_ want you. Why the hell do you think I got so upset about that dress?" He knew she was a little clueless about things like this but she couldn't possibly think that guys didn't want her, could she?

"Really, Logan? You really think so?" she asked sarcastically, "Because Dean left me for Lindsay, and Jess left me for Cali-freaking-fornia. That doesn't exactly scream 'I want you,' to me. The only two guys who have ever given me the time of day and they just left." She was shivering now and Logan didn't know of it was from the cold or from the soft sobs she was trying to contain but he took his jacket off and once again put it over her shoulders.

"I swear, it's just to keep you warm. Keeping you covered is just an added bonus," he smirked. Now that he'd taken care of the cold, he decided to take care of the tears by pulling her into a hug and gently rubbing her back. "Now, about those guys. First of all, Dean and Jess are _not_ the only guys who have ever given you the time of day, they're just the only ones you've ever noticed- you sometimes tend to be a little blind about these things, god bless you for that, cause there would be a lot of guys with broken noses otherwise. And as far as those specific two are concerned, I think I speak on behalf of all men when I tell you that…we're all idiots. We have a tendency not to notice a good thing when we've got it, and believe me when I tell you that you're a good thing." He softly stroked her hair as he listed all her amazing qualities. "You're smart," she was one of the few people who could really keep him on his toes in a debate. "You're funny," she always had a witty come back. "You're beautiful," it was true, as much as he liked to think of her as the little girl in pig tails from the vineyard he knew she'd grown into a beautiful woman.

Rory laid her head against his chest and let him hold her. She listened to him tell her how stupid guys were and how great she was and she felt…loved. It had been so long since she had felt that way. She supposed the last time was way back when she'd first dated Dean. Jess was fun to be with and fun to make out with but he never really gave her that safe and loved feeling. And the second time she had been with Dean there was something missing. She had tried to convince herself that things were the same between them because she still loved him so much, but deep down she could tell that he still belonged to Lindsay.

So as she stood there in Logan's embrace she closed her eyes and let her mind flit back to those early days with Dean, and she imagined she was back there. God, it felt so good to be back there, in his arms. She pressed herself up on her tippy toes and placed a soft kiss to his lips only when she opened her eyes it wasn't Dean, it was Logan. "Oh shit," she cursed as she pulled back.

"Umm, wow," was all Logan could even think to say through his shock. He couldn't believe she'd just done that, but was more was that he couldn't believe that it didn't suck. Weird, awkward, uncomfortable, laughable…all words he would have expected to describe a kiss between him and Ace, but it wasn't any of those things.; it was almost...good.

"Oh god, Logan, I am _so_ sorry. "I was thinking about…and then you were…and then I started remembering…oh god," she ranted.

Logan pulled himself out of his daze; the quality of the kiss was not an issue here and he couldn't be thinking about that. She was upset and lonely and confused but there was nothing between them but friendship and he knew she felt the same. The kiss meant nothing. "Ace," he began but Rory didn't let him speak.

"No, Logan. You have to believe me. I completely forgot it was you. I mean I just miss him so much and then you were holding me like he used to and I started thinking about…"

"Ace, stop." She stopped her ranting and forced herself to look at him. "As far as I'm concerned it never happened."

She breathed a sigh of relief and visibly relaxed. "Oh thank god. I _swear_, it meant nothing."

"Uh uh uh," he told her. "We're not talking about it because it never happened," he reminded.

She smiled at him gratefully. "Right. Thank you, Logan. Now how about we get back to this party? She turned and began walking back in and as Logan watched her go he noticed for the first time that she really was sexy. She had a cute little walk and a really nice ass and…dear god, did he really just think that? Was he seriously just admiring his Ace's ass? Dear lord it was going to take a _lot_ of alcohol to abolish that image from his head.

* * *

**Please leave a review; I'll be forever thankful :)**

**PS- The dress is on my profile :)**


	6. Happy Trees

**AN: OK, so I've decided that when** **I post the next chapter I'm raising the rating to M instead of just point out the M rated chapters because there's a lot of adult content in this even in the non smutty chapters. So that means if you want to keep reading you should either remember to check for M rated updates which don't show on the normal "just-in" page or you should put this on your story alert list. **

* * *

Rory hurried off the balcony and headed towards the bar; she usually wasn't much of a drinker but she suddenly felt the need to get very, very drunk. What the hell had she just done? How could she have just lost herself in the moment like that and forgotten where she was and who she was with? Sure Logan had _said _he understood and that he was willing to just forget about it but did he really mean it? What if he thought it meant something more? What if he thought it meant she was developing feelings for him? Would he start distancing himself from her? She couldn't stand it if he did that; she couldn't stand to lose him. He was her best friend and the most important person in the world to her- after her mom and dad of course. Plus, if things were weird between them, then it would throw off the whole group dynamic; what if their friends started taking sides? She couldn't let that happen either. It was going to take a lot of alcohol to get her mind off this.

She approached the bar and signaled to the bartender that she needed a drink. "What can I get for ya?" he asked her.

"Umm, something strong…just surprise me," she didn't really care what it was as long as it got her seriously toasted.

"She'll take a lemon drop," a familiar voice butted in. "Make that two."

"A lemon drop, Steph? That doesn't sound very strong," Rory asked.

"It's a straight up shot of vodka with a lemon chaser dipped in sugar, hun. It's plenty strong. And I have to say, I'm very proud to see you embracing the college life of drinking and partying, I knew I'd wear you down someday."

Logan approached the bar just as the bartender finished filling the shot glasses and pushing a bowl of lemons and sugar towards the two girls. "Geez Steph, first that dress, now straight up shots of vodka? When are you going to stop trying to corrupt my best friend," he asked her playfully.

"I'll stop trying to corrupt her when I've decided she's been sufficiently corrupted. Now if you'll excuse us, we girls have some serious drinking and dancing to do." Steph handed Rory her shot and a lemon. "Cheers," she raised her own shot glass and the girls downed their vodka, then quickly shoved the lemon in their mouth to ease the burning sensation it left.

Rory pulled the lemon rind out of her mouth and slammed her hand down on the table. "Barkeep, I'll have another," she said.

Steph grabbed her hand and pulled her away from the bar a few feet. "What do you say we do a little dancing first? I want you to have a good time and it's a little hard to do that if you're in the hospital with alcohol poisoning."

Rory pouted, "But I want another." She knew she had a low tolerance but still, one shot was not going to be enough to make her forget her beyond mortifying lip lock with Logan.

"I can't believe I'm saying this, but I think you should listen to Steph, Ace. It won't exactly take much to get you drunk; you should pace yourself."

"Fine," she reluctantly agreed. "I'll wait."

"Now Logan, if you'll excuse us, we have a dance floor to burn it up on," Steph grabbed Rory's hand and pulled her out into the crowd.

"I'll have a scotch, neat," Logan told the bartender as he watched the two girls walk away from the bar. Like before, his eyes traveled lower than they should have and he stared for a few moments before he remembered exactly who he was staring at. He immediately snapped his head back towards the bartender. "Better make that two," he said with a sigh. This was very, very bad.

Several hours later, Rory and Steph were dancing with Colin, Finn and several other LDB members. With each shot Steph had taken throughout the night, she became less and less interested in monitoring Rory's alcohol intake so that both girls were now incredibly drunk.

Rory wasn't sure she had ever been quite so drunk before, but she loved the feeling; she was proving to be a very happy drunk. She wasn't sure why she was so happy, because she vaguely remembered being rather unhappy at the beginning of the evening, but she certainly wasn't unhappy anymore. She was pretty sure she was trying to forget something but she couldn't remember what it was she was trying to forget. Was the thing she was trying to forget the thing that was making her happy? But if it made her happy, why was she trying to forget it. Or maybe it was the fact that she had successfully forgotten what it was she was trying to forget that was making her happy. Or maybe it was just the six shots of vodka. What ever it was, she didn't want the feeling to end so when Steph dragged her off to the bar for another shot, she didn't hesitate.

"Maybe you two should take a little break from the alcohol," Colin suggested, following both girls to the bar.

"Lay off, mate. They're just trying to have a little fun, it won't hurt them. Look at me, I drink excessively all the time and I'm perfectly fine," Finn told his uptight friend.

Colin just glared at him. "Sure you are Finn," he rolled his eyes at the slightly crazy, but extremely lovable, Australian lush in front of him.

"He is," Steph protested. "Finn is fine. He's a fine, fine Finn. A fine Finn is a Finn that's fine," she rambled drunkenly. Rory laughed hysterically at this, finding it to be far more entertaining than it actually was.

"He's a fine Finn that Finn is, indeed," she repeated with a laugh.

"Stephy, I really don't think you should have anymore to drink," Colin tried again. He turned to Rory, "and neither should you."

"Oh course we should. I'm going to do another shot. Ooh, I want to do a body shot. Do a body shot with me Colin," she said, jumping up and down excitedly.

"I'm not doing a body shot with you, babe. And there's no way in hell I'm letting you do a body shot with any other guy in this place, so just forget about."

"Fine, if I can't do a body shot with you, and I can't do a body shot with any other guy, then I'll do one with Rory, she's not a guy. Come on Rory, do a body shot with me."

"Steph!" Colin declared.

"Nope, it's been decided. Body shots for me and Rory. Barkeeper, get us some tequila."

"Make that vodka," Colin yelled to the bartender, with a roll of his eyes. If he couldn't stop her from drinking more, at least he could stop her from mixing her alcohols.

"But you can't do body shots with vodka, Colin," she told her boyfriend.

"You'll use lemons and sugar instead of salt and limes. You're not mixing your liquors…and you're only doing one, then I'm cutting you off."

"Oooh, ooh!" Steph replied excitedly. "Why didn't I ever think of that? Vodka's way tastier than tequila, it'll be totally better for body shots. OK, Ror, you first or me first?"

"Weeeeeell," Rory drawled, "I've never done one before, so…"

Stephanie gasped. "You've never done a body shot? You're a body shot virgin. We have to do something about this. Oooh, now I'll be able to tell everyone that I took your virginity, won't that be a story to tell," Steph smirked. "It'll be a way cooler story then the real 'losing your virginity' story."

"Steph, I lost my virginity to my married ex-boyfriend and had my mother catch us in the immediate post-coital period. Nothing's a better story than that." Strangely enough this conversation didn't seem to bother Rory; in fact in her currently inebriated state she almost found it amusing.

"Hah, 'coital,'" Stephanie laughed. "That's a funny word. I like that you use big, funny words when you're drunk."

"I like it too. Using big words makes me happy. Everything is making me happy tonight. I'm a happy little drunk in a happy little bar with happy little body shots of happy vodka."

Stephanie laughed. "You sound like the happy painter. "…and now I'm going to paint a happy little tree in my happy little forest'," Steph mimicked the TV "star."

Rory sighed. "I wish I had a happy little tree in my happy little forest."

"Know what's funny?" Steph said excitedly. "I have a happy little tree," she pointed at Colin, "but I got rid of my happy little forest; gone, just like all the rain forests, hey maybe that's why they call it a Brazillian. Anyhow, we should find you a happy little Colin tree for your happy little Rory forest- but not really a Colin tree because his tree belongs to me."

"Woah, woah, woah!" Colin stepped in. "First of all, we are _not_ finding a 'happy little tree' for Rory's…'happy little forest.' Any tree that wants to be happy can go find another forest to do it in…oh my god I cannot believe I just said that. Second of all, my happy tree is _not_ little; and third, I don't know how I feel about you telling other people about your forest, or lack thereof. God, this is a disturbing metaphor."

"That's alright baby, we understand that you're just a little uptight because your tree hasn't gotten to get happy in a few nights. After Rory and I do our body shots we should sneak off to the bathroom for a quickie," Stephanie suggested.

Colin blushed, bright red. "Thank you for that, Steph. I appreciate you telling the entire LDB how long it's been since I've gotten laid."

"I'm sure your rep will remain intact," she turned back to Rory. "Now what do you say we do these shots."

Logan walked up to the bar for another glass of scotch. He'd had more than he could count, since trying to drown out his impure thoughts was turning out to be more difficult than he had anticipated. He'd forget about her temporarily but as soon as he'd spot across the room he'd think something dirty which would immediately creep him out and send him running for the bar, and another glass of scotch. Just a few minutes ago he had seen her and Stephanie doing some kind of seductive dance move that would normally piss him off to no end, but instead, it seemed to turn him on. So here he was at the bar, awaiting yet another drink that he hoped would finally succeed in killing off the brain cells that were generating these highly disturbing thoughts.

He scanned the bar, trying to locate the bartender and he finally found him a few yards away pouring a couple of shots of vodka. That's when he saw who he was pouring the shots for- Stephanie and Rory were laughing hysterically about something and they were clearly drunk out of their skulls. He knew cutting them off would be hypocritical considering the amount of alcohol he had consumed, but they appeared to be way drunker than even he was…of course that could be do to the fact that they were hyper, happy drunk and he was mellow drunk, but either way, he decided that they didn't need those extra shots. As he went to move towards them he saw something that made him stop dead in his tracks. Did Stephanie seriously just _lick_ her?

He couldn't move. He just stood there, dumbstruck as Steph sprinkled some sugar onto the moistened skin over Rory's collar bone, took her shot of vodka, then licked her _again_ and then proceeded to eat the lemon directly out of Rory's mouth.

The very last thing he needed in his life was to be turned on by the sight of his best friend and the girlfriend of his other best friend doing body shots off one another but the tightening in his pants told him he didn't have a choice in the matter.

Rory finished doing her body shot off Stephanie and he was just starting to come out of his daze when Rory spotted him. "Logaaaaaan!" she cried gleefully as she ran towards him. She jumped on him, throwing her arms around his neck, and nearly knocking him over. She hugged him tightly and placed a wet, sloppy kiss on his cheek. He stiffened up, in more ways than one. He seriously needed her to get off before she felt the effect she was having on him.

_Think unsexy thoughts, think unsexy thoughts,_ he chanted to himself. _Baseball, grandma, little kid Rory in pig tails._ He was sure that last one would work. How could he be turned on by her if he was seeing her as a child? But that was really the problem; he _couldn't_ see her as a child anymore. He always knew she had grown up into a knockout but it was never how _he _saw her because he always carried that image of her as a ten year old, with him. But with that one press of her lips to his that image had vanished from his head and all that was left was the beautiful, sexy woman she had become. He needed to get that image back before he wound up doing something he would seriously regret.

"I haven't seen you aaaaall night, Logan. Were you avoiding me?" she asked jokingly.

_Ummm…yes._ "Of course not, Ace."

"Steph was just teaching me how to do body shots. They're fun."

"Yeah," he forced out a chuckle. "I saw." _Man, did I see._

"I want to do another one; do one with me, Logan."

_Oh god. _He swallowed the lump in his throat. "I don't think you need anymore body shots, Ace…or any more to drink at all, for that matter."

"But I want to do another one," she pouted.

_Damn she's sexy when she purses her lips up like that._ _God, is everything she does going to turn me on tonight? I have to stop thinking like this. _"No," he told her.

"Fine, if you won't do a body shot with me, I'll find someone who will." Her eyes scanned the crowd around her- Colin definitely wouldn't agree and though Finn had supported her and Stephanie's earlier campaign for more alcohol, even he would probably try to cut her off now, and then there was….Robert. Her eyes landed on him and she immediately smiled. "I bet Robert would do a body shot with me.'

_Heeeell no. That asshole is not putting his tongue anywhere near Ace._ Shit, what was he going to do now? If just watching her do a body shot was a turn on he didn't want to think about how his body would react to actually doing one with her, but if he said 'no' she'd go off and do one with Robert and there was no way in hell he was going to let that happen.

As Rory moved to approach Robert, Logan grabbed her hand. "Fine, one shot. But after that you have to promise that you won't have anymore alcohol and that you will drink at least two glasses of water." She was going to be seriously sick in the morning.

"Party pooper," she rolled her eyes at him. "Fine, this will be my last shot," she promised.

Logan had the bartender prepare the shots along with a glass of water for Rory. He turned back to her and as he did so, her hands reached up to start untying his bowtie. "Umm, Ace, what are you doing?"

"Unbuttoning your shirt," she replied

He squeazed his eyes shut and took a deep breath _baseball, baseball, baseball_ he repeated to himself. "Why?"

"I can't do a shot off you if I can't reach your neck." Unfortunately he couldn't really argue with that logic.

The shots were laid before them and Rory pulled Logan towards her before sticking her tongue out and running it up his neck. He tried to think of everything and anything unsexy…_Grandma, Rosie O'Donnel, Billy Crystal, Finn during one of his naked phases._ But nothing seemed to stop his growing erection as she completed her body shot and took the lemon from his mouth.

She finally pulled away and he breathed a sigh of relief. "OK, now drink your water," he pushed the glass the bartender had prepared, towards her.

"Wait, you haven't done your shot yet." Damn, he'd forgotten about that.

"That's alright, Ace. I think I'm good," he tried.

"No, that's not how it works. I do a shot off you, you do a shot off me…_that's_ how it works. I did my shot, now you have to do yours."

He looked her up and down, wishing to God that she wasn't so attractive, or at least that he could go back to not noticing how attractive she was. He didn't get it; he never got this hot and bothered by a girl, no matter how sexy. Why her? Why did she have to be the one that got to him like this? Why couldn't it be any other girl? And why the hell did she have to be so damn adamant about this f-ing body shot?

"Come on, Logan," she pushed the shot towards him, and picked up his lemon and put it in her mouth for him.

_Just stay up high, be quick and grab the lemon from as far away from her lips as possible, _he instructed himself. Of course this didn't work and as soon as he bent down to lick her he couldn't stop his tongue from traveling along the same path as the plunging neck line of her dress, lingering on the area of exposed skin directly between her breasts. He pulled back, sprinkled some sugar on her, lapped it back off with his tongue and reached up for the lemon, taking it fully in his mouth so that her lips were mere millimeters away from his. He paused for a moment, savoring the feeling of her warm breath assaulting his face, before reluctantly pulling the lemon out of her mouth and stepping away. _Huston, we have a problem._

* * *

**I promise that next chapter will be the hook up, it took me a bit longer to get there than I expected, probably because I spent so muc time of Stephanie's drunken ranting but it's just so much fun to write drunken ranting. ANyway, hope you enjoy the chapter, please leave a review.**


	7. Everything is Different Now

**AN: OK, so here it is. A merry** **Christmas Eve present for you all. I'm gonna lay out the smut warning right here an now...it's smutty, I hope you don't mind, since I know how much you all hate smut ;) Next chapter may not be right away since I need to work on a chapter or two of Worlds Together..I've left those readers hanging a bit too long. Anyway, thanks for all the reviews last chapter, it was overwhelming; lets see if you can all overwhelm me again. ;)**

* * *

About an hour later, Logan had finally convinced Rory that it was time to leave. He had wanted to go ever since that body shot which had ended with him using every once of his strength to fight to urge to spit out the lemon in his mouth and kiss his Ace crazy. God that body shot had been intense. He could still taste the saltiness of her skin, and later, the way it was sweetened by the sugar. He could still smell the hint of lemon that lingered on her breath as he removed the fruit from her mouth. He could still feel the warmth radiating off of her body. And every one of these memories sent the blood rushing to his groin. 

He hoped that if he could just make it to a bed and pass out, he could forget the thoughts that had been plaguing him all night. Perhaps it was just one of those crazy, alcohol fueled nights where nothing made sense and the next morning he would either have blacked it out or he would look back on it with complete mortification…but at least the thoughts would be gone. Of course a tiny voice in the back of his head reminded him that the thoughts had begun before the drinking, but he chose to ignore that voice.

Even though he wanted to go, Logan couldn't leave without Rory; he was her sponser and he was responsible for her. And as much as he wanted to leave, he didn't fight Rory on it too much because if he was perfectly honest with himself, he didn't trust himself to be alone with her at that moment.

Rory had finally relented to Logan's half hearted attempts to get her to leave the party. He instinctively moved to wrap his arm around Rory's waist and lead her out of the hall but the moment he laid a hand on her, all the memories from earlier came rushing back to him and he jerked his hand away again.

They made it out to the street and Logan hailed them a cab. He opened the door and helped Rory into the car. She slid across to the far seat and he got in after her. Apparently, sliding across the seats had twisted up her dress a bit and she began futzing with the material, trying to readjust the outfit. He stared at her in awe as her hands slid over her body, trying to untwist and flatten out the black fabric that clung to her every curve.

"Where to?" he just barely heard the cabbie mutter.

"Umm, the Plaza," he muttered without thinking, still staring at her intently. She finally stopped fidgeting with her dress as the taxi pulled out into the New York City streets and he forced himself to look away.

The cab was silent as he stared out the window, watching buildings, and people, and cars go by. Rory let her head loll back against the seats and she closed her eyes. She had been as hyper as could be a few moments ago but the minute she stopped moving the depressant effects of the alcohol had taken hold and she began to feel sleepy.

Rory didn't mind the silence, it was normal between her and Logan- they told each other everything and still it was common for them to have nothing to say. Even in her drunken state, however, she began to notice that this silence was different from the usual- it was almost…awkward. She opened her eyes to look at Logan and noticed that he was staring out the window, obviously deep in thought. Her observation skills were far from keen, what with all the vodka coursing through her veins, but she could tell something was bothering him.

"Watcha looking at?" she asked playfully, leaning over to peek out the window with him.

Before he could answer, the car stopped short at a red light and Rory lost her balance, falling forward into Logan. She stuck her hand out to brace herself and it landed firmly on the seat…right between his legs.

Rory was about to pull her hand away and sit back up again but she felt something that made her stop. Was that?...Was he?... She forced her eyes down and spotted the obvious bulge in his tuxedo pants. She knew that on any normal day, under any normal conditions, she would be utterly humiliated by this situation, but today wasn't any normal day and her extremely high blood alcohol content made this anything but normal conditions, and she somehow found the idea that she had given Logan an erection… exhilarating. It was what she had been wanting after all, wasn't it? For someone to want her?

She had no idea what came over her as she turned her head to look at him. His eyes were widened as he stared down at her and she knew, that he knew, that she knew. She smiled and giggled at him. "Oops, did I do that?" She finally pulled her hand away, making sure to brush it up against his crotch as she did so. She watched his face intently as she did this and she saw his eyes squeeze shut and his adam's apple bob up and then down as he swallowed, hard.

She was turning him on. She laughed to herself at the irony of it; he- Logan Huntzberger, playboy extraordinaire, a man who could have almost any girl he wanted, who had slept with girls who could have careers as super models if only the could master the task of chewing gum and walking at the same time, was turned on by her- shy, bookish, demure, Rory Hayden, who had always occupied the little kid sister role in his life. When had this happened? She tried to think back through the haze of alcohol. Things seemed normal when he had picked her up from her dorm earlier that day…he had even teased her about the lingerie. They had engaged in their usual banter in Times Square. He had been absolutely horrified when he'd first seen her in her revealing dress. Then there was the scene on the balcony which had ended with…oh god their kiss. She had forgotten all about that kiss, though she supposed that had been the point of all of those shots she had indulged in. After that he had disappeared for most of the evening only to reemerge when she and Steph had been doing body shots, which he had been rather hesitant to join in on, and when he finally did…damn, how had she not even realized that his tongue had gone where Logan Huntzberger's tongue should not have gone?

"Rory," it came out rough, almost like a growl. She cocked her head and looked at him expectantly, her eyes wide and innocent appearing. He had nothing to follow it with; no excuse for what she had just felt and seen, and that look she was giving him was not helping him think of something to say. He wondered if she had any idea what she was doing to him…beyond the obvious, of course. Little did he know that, in a very un-Rory-like fashion, she knew exactly what she was doing to him…and she was enjoying it.

Logan was saved from further humiliation as the cab pulled to a stop outside the Plaza hotel. Logan paid the driver and he and Rory got out of the car. They walked into the lavish lobby and Logan almost immediately noticed something was wrong; this wasn't how the lobby had looked earlier that afternoon and yet it looked the same as it had the last few times they'd been there- and then it hit him; they weren't staying at the Plaza, they were staying at the Waldorf. Although the Plaza was the LDB's usual hotel, they had been unable to obtain all the rooms they had needed for this event and so they had changed their accommodations, just this once. Apparently the haze in Logan's brain caused by the alcohol and the sight of Rory touching herself had distracted him enough to forget about this change when the driver was asking him where to go. _Shit, the Waldorf was all the way across the city!_

"Umm, Ace," he started.

"Yes?" she asked turning to look at him, and giving him a coy little smile.

"I…uh…I think we're at the wrong hotel," he admitted hesitantly.

"Well where's the right hotel?" she pouted at him. God he wanted to kiss her…but no! He couldn't be thinking about that.

"Far away from here," He didn't think either of them would be able to remain conscious long enough for the cab ride.

"Well then, we'll just have to get a room here for the night," she concluded. "Where's your wallet?" She reached around him and stuck her hand in his back pocket to retrieve the desired item. "Oops, wrong one," she looked up at him with her big doe eyes before reaching her other hand around to the other pocket and digging out his wallet.

He mentally flogged himself for the thoughts that were swimming through his brain as she bounced away towards the front desk. When he was finally able to move again he joined her at the counter where the concierge was speaking.

"I'm sorry miss," the woman said, looking at the two twenty-somethings with utter disdain. "I don't think we have any rooms here that would suit your needs."

"Why don't you just go ahead and look anyway," Logan suggested, taking his wallet out of Rory's hand and pulling out his American Express Black Card. Upon seeing this, as well as the name written on the card, the concierge immediately began singing a new tune.

"Of course, Mr. Huntzberger. I am so sorry."

"We'll need two adjoining rooms," he told the woman who paused briefly to give the pair a baffled look, not understanding why they would want separate rooms, but she didn't question them about it.

After looking through the computer system for a few moments her face noticeably fell. "I'm so, so sorry, Mr. Huntzberger; we don't have any adjoining rooms available. The best we can offer you is a suite."

Logan shifted his gaze nervously to Rory. _Danger, Will Robinson,_ his mind alerted him. "That'll be alright; won't it, Logan?" he heard Rory say as she slipped her arm around his waist and squeezed.

"Umm, yeah. Fine," he muttered, not knowing what else to do. They had shared a bed before but that was _not_ an option this time, especially considering the fact that they had nothing to sleep in. He took the key card that was handed to him with a nod and headed towards the elevators, Rory's arm still around him.

When they got into the elevator Logan leaned back against the wall and Rory snuggled further into his side, resting her head against his shoulder. He didn't say anything, he didn't even have a clue what he could possibly say. He just gritted his teeth, took some deep breaths and tried to retain as much control over the situation as possible. It was a suite so there would be a separate room with a couch that he could sleep on, and they would have robes for them to wear- it wasn't ideal but it would be better than sleeping in their party clothes. He would help get her to sleep and then he would pass out on the couch and the whole crazy day would be over.

"Thanks, I had a lot of fun tonight." Great, she was even sounding like one of his dates now, only she wasn't his date, she was Ace and he needed to remember that. He turned his head to respond to her and met her lips head on._ Geez, not again._ That thought was gone from his head almost instantaneously, as was every other rational thought. His hands slid around her waist, pulling her tightly to his body. His tongue darted out of his mouth, caressing her lips until they parted for him. He entered her mouth and his tongue found hers. It felt like they were dancing together and it might as well have been choreographed the way they responded so perfectly to one another.

The ding of the elevator suddenly brought him back to his senses and he pulled away. God damn she was an amazing kisser. He should have known; he should have realized that if that tiny little peck from earlier could get him so worked up, that a full blown kiss like they'd just shared would be the death of him…and it _would_ be the death of him if Colin or Finn ever found out- they'd murder him.

"We should…umm…" he gestured towards the open elevator door.

She nodded her head and walked out into the hall. He took a deep breath, trying to keep himself from having a complete nervous breakdown; maybe neither one of them would even remember that kiss come morning; but somehow he knew that that was a kiss he would never forget.

He raced to catch up to her just outside the door to the room they had been assigned. He slid the key in the lock and let them in.

The door shut behind them and he tried to speak. "Rory…about what just…in the elevator…We should…I didn't…"

He sure was cute when he was flustered. She didn't know why she was getting so much pleasure out of seeing him like this. It just- it made her feel all those things she had been wanting to feel again for so long- beautiful, sexy, wanted, even loved. It was why she had been flirting with him ever since she's realized how she was affecting him. She wasn't usually a flirter but it just felt so good she couldn't stop. She really hadn't meant to kiss him in the elevator- it was just supposed to be a peck on the cheek- but she wasn't disappointed it happened. That kiss had been amazing. It had held the passion of the kisses she'd shared with Jess and the sense of intimacy of her kisses with Dean. If that was what kisses were always like with Logan, then she wanted more- and she was far to inebriated to worry about the consequences.

"Logan," she interrupted his ramble. She watched as he took a deep breath and raised his eyes to meet hers. "Don't worry about it."

He looked at her incredulously. "Don't worry about it?" he repeated

"It was just a kiss." She didn't want to talk about this; she didn't want to scrutinize it. When she sobered up it would probably be the only thing she could do, but for now she only wanted feelings and actions not thoughts and analyses.

He cocked his head to the side and looked at her appraisingly. "OK, this is a really weird Freaky Friday moment we've got going on here."

"Huh?"

"We seem to have changed places."

She chuckled at him with a smile. "You're cute when you're making pop culture references."

OK, her calling him cute was not helping matters. He was freaking out and analyzing the situation was the only thing that was keeping him from kissing her senseless again. And just when he needed her to be her normal, over-thinking, pro-con list-making self- she was taking nothing seriously.

"I'm going to bed. Is there anything to sleep in?" she asked as she walked off to the bed room.

"Wait, Ace." He followed her into the room where she was pulling a terry cloth robe out of the closet.

"Was there something else?" she turned to face him, laying the robe on the bed.

"Something else?" he spat. "You mean something other than that moment in the elevator a few minutes ago that could potentially change the course of our life long friendship forever? Something else, _other_ than that?"

"You're thinking about this way to much," she said simply, as she removed her shoes

"And you're not thinking about it enough. What the hell is up with that?"

"Logan," she replied, moving towards him. "It was just a kiss. People do it all the time," she was standing directly in front of him, her eyes boring into him. It was making him incredibly nervous. Then, before he knew what was happening she was sliding her arms around his neck and crashing her lips to his. As suddenly as it had started, it ended. She simply pulled back and stepped away. "See? Just a kiss," she smiled at him and began to turn around. "Now will you unzip my dress so I can…"

He wasn't listening to her anymore; he probably couldn't hear her over the roaring in his ears and the pounding in his chest, even if he wanted to. He grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her back to him, attacking her mouth rabidly. He couldn't get enough of her; he didn't know if he'd ever be able to get enough of her.

"We…should…stop…" he mumbled as he moved his mouth away from hers and nipped his way down her neck.

She took her hand to his crotch and felt his erection. "But you don't want to." It wasn't a question. He wanted her and she needed to be wanted; she needed these feelings he was stirring inside her- feelings she had been afraid she would never feel again.

"God, no" he admitted breathlessly through his kisses. He definitely didn't want to stop and truthfully, he was too far gone to stop. The only thing that could end this now was the word "no" coming directly out of her mouth and even then he knew the loss of contact would be incredibly painful. Of course, the way she was responding to him, he didn't expect to hear that word escape from her lips and if there were enough blood left in his brain to form a complete thought, he would wonder if that thrilled him or terrified him.

"Me either," she admitted. She pushed his tuxedo jacket off of his shoulders and removed his cummerbund. His arms reached around her to draw down the zipper of her dress as she tugged his shirt free from his pants. He looked up into her eyes and they were stormy, clouded over with lust.

He kissed along her shoulder from inside to outside, nudging the strap of her dress down with his nose. Moving to the other shoulder her repeated the same with the second strap until the dress slid off her and landed in a heap at her feet. She was wearing nothing now, but a thong and a couple of pasties.

His right hand moved up to cover her left breast and he massaged her for a few moments before pealing the pasty off. She was working on the buttons of his shirt. He brought his head down to take her exposed nipple in his mouth. His left hand was now fiddling with her right breast, freeing it from the last of its confines.

They backed up to the bed and she took a seat. His unbuttoned shirt dropped off of his body. He reached into his back pocket for his wallet and removed the condom from within, setting it on the night stand. By this point she had succeeded in unbuckling his belt and she was now unzipping his pants. They fell to the ground and using one foot, he slipped both the pant leg and his shoe off, then did the same with the other foot.

She reached into his boxers and took him in her hand, circling the tip of his head with her thumb. He inhaled sharply; god that felt good- too good. "Stop," he told her, reaching for her hand. "Not yet." A quickie wasn't going to cut it for him; not this time; not with her.

He laid her back on the bed and assaulted her lips again. "Close your eyes," he whispered. He laid a gentle kiss on her forehead, each of her eyelids, her nose, back to her lips, then to her chin. He moved his mouth to her ear and sucked on it before nipping his way down her neck, across her collar bone and back up the other side.

He inched down a bit, bracing himself over her with his left arm and running his right arm down her side, over her hip, caressing the skin of her thigh. She instinctively brought her leg up and wrapped it around him so that when his hand moved back up it was resting on her ass which was soft and fleshy like a woman should feel, not hard like steel. His hand skimmed along her backside, giving it an occasional squeeze which would cause her to moan in pleasure.

Her hands wound their way through his hair as he continued to kiss every inch of her- above her breasts, between them, and finally over them. When he had explored them completely, he moved on. She had a birth mark on the left, just over her rib cage; he had never known that was there. He traced it with his tongue, trying to memorize it; he wanted to know her body like he knew the rest of her.

He was moving slowly and deliberately and as much as she enjoyed the sensations he was creating all over her, they were becoming too intense not to do something about them. "Logan…need…more," she breathed out. He wasn't done with her yet, but to keep her satisfied in the mean time he moved his hand between her legs and slipped her thong to the side. He began massaging her clit while his mouth and free hand continued charting out her body.

"God…Logan...feels…so good," she was panting heavily. "But need…inside." He obeyed, inserting one finger inside her, followed by another. He pumped his hand rapidly as his mouth traveled down her leg as far as he could reach. He pulled out of her and switched hands, returning to external stimulation as he kissed his way back up the other side. He could tell she was near the edge by the time he had made his way back up her leg. He let his lips trail to the inside of her thigh, and as he neared her center, his fingers disappeared inside her once again and he latched onto her clit with his mouth, sucking gently.

"Oh God…God Logan…Don't stop…Logaaaaaaaan," she screamed, her back arched up and her body quivered all over.

When she stopped shaking with pleasure he withdrew his fingers. He removed her thong completely, followed by his boxers. Then he crawled his way back up to the head of the bed and kissed her fully on the lips once more. "You're beautiful," he told her as he pulled back. He wasn't sure why he felt the need to tell her this; he never stopped to say it to any other girl he'd had sex with- perhaps he felt that the mere fact that they were having sex should be validation enough- but he wanted to make sure she knew.

She smiled back at him. "Logan?"

"Hmm?"

"Are you going to fuck me now?" He never thought he would enjoy hearing the word "fuck" escape her lips as much as he did at that very moment.

"Yeah, Ace. Yeah…I am."

"Good." She reached her hand out to the night table and fumbled around until she found the condom. She tore it open and held it in her right hand. Her left hand reached down and gently stroked the underside of his shaft, before she brought her right hand down and rolled the condom onto him.

He plunged into her. She was incredibly tight and he paused for a moment to revel in the feel of her surrounding him. He began to thrust into her and she brought her legs up around his waist to draw him in deeper as she simultaneously brought her hips up to meet his. Her hands flew above her head and she grabbed onto the bars in the headboard. She continued to buck her hips, harder and harder, faster and faster, loving the way he filled her and the friction he was creating inside of her. She couldn't get enough and she tried to convey this to him through her screams and moans. "Harder…deeper…faster," she instructed periodically. He was amazed at how vocal she was and he tried his best to comply with her demands. They rode out the waves of bliss with fervent passion until their pleasure reached orgasmic levels, with her coming just moments before him.

He collapsed on top of her, every muscle in his body feeling like jelly from a mixture of over-exertion and sheer ecstasy.

Finally mustering up enough energy, he rolled off of her. He removed the condom and threw it in the trashcan by the bed, before rolling back over and snuggling up to her in a spooning position.

"Logan…" she whispered.

"Shhh," he instructed. He didn't want to talk; talking would lead to thinking which would lead to panic at the knowledge that his life would never be the same. "We'll worry about it tomorrow. Just go to sleep now." No matter what, everything was different now; but for the moment he just ignored that fact and held her in his arms as they drifted off to sleep.

* * *

**Just a little reminder that this would be the point in the process where you leave a review ;)**


	8. Meaningless

**AN: I just wanted to tell you guys that you are like--the awsomest readers ever. Seriously, 41 reviews on the last chapter and _45_ on the one before. That's completely insane in a completely amazing way. Thanks so much and please keep it up.**

* * *

Rory woke up to the pounding in her head. Was someone playing the Congo drums in there? And her mouth…had someone filled it with sand? Because it felt like the Mohave had set up shop.

She wanted to open her eyes but she was afraid of the effects light would have on her already throbbing temples. Was this a hangover? Had she been drinking? Oh yes, she remembered now, something about LDB initiation. Logan had picked her up and they had been forced to participate in that inane scavenger hunt. There had been a party and a new dress that Logan had hated; they had fought and then he comforted her and…crap! She had kissed him. If her memory served her properly, he took it rather well but she still felt completely embarrassed about it. She didn't remember much after that; she must have drunk a lot to temper the humiliation brought about by the accidental lip-lock.

She finally pried her eyes open, curiosity getting the best of her. She assumed she was in a hotel; Logan or one of the others surely took care of her, but she couldn't remember how she got here…wherever here technically was. She was in a big, soft, comfy bed so it had to be a hotel, right? When her lids fluttered open, she confirmed that she was indeed in a hotel room. She went to turn over but she felt strange; she felt—naked. She pulled up the sheet that was covering her and peeked down; yep, definitely naked. That probably wasn't good. She took a deep breath and sat up, gripping the top sheet to her bare body. Scattered all along the floor of the room was not only her dress, but various items that made up a man's tuxedo.

OK, time to panic. She'd had sex. She must have had sex. A naked Rory plus evidence of a naked man—circumstantial as it may be—definitely added up to sex. She'd had sex and she didn't even know who her partner had been. What if she'd slept with an axe-murderer…wait, she was still alive so she could probably cross that off her list. But he still could have been anybody; maybe he was a thief who'd tied her up and ran away with all of her money; only she wasn't tied up and he was still there somewhere…unless he'd run off naked which was probably not likely. Plus, whoever he was had been wearing a tux, so chances were it was at least someone from the LDB. Man, when Logan found out one of his own had…_oh shit_!

Logan. It was coming back to her now; she'd had sex with Logan. No, it wasn't possible; she couldn't have and he would never dream of touching her like that…only he had. The memories were becoming clearer and she definitely remembered him touching her like that— and damn it felt good. No, not good. Well—yes, actually—very good but it was Logan, he'd had a lot of practice whereas she had only…Her panic instantly grew. The girls he slept with were usually so experienced and she'd only ever been with Dean. She had probably been awful. They had gone and possibly messed up ten years of friendship and it probably hadn't even been good for him. God, if she thought that kiss was embarrassing, this was the mother load of all humiliations.

She took a few deep breaths and tried to calm herself down. She just had to look at this objectively. It could have been so much worse…remember the axe-murderer theory? At least she had been with someone who cared about her. Logan would have taken good care of her and…she turned over to peek into the garbage can…yep, they had been safe—that was another check in the plus column. At least there wouldn't be any blue-eyed, blond-haired babies popping out in the next nine months.

She began to calm down a little; it was only sex, right? Sex with Logan. Logan had sex all the time; it was meaningless to him. It would only bother him because he would know it bothered her. If it didn't bother her, then everything would be all right. So that was it then; she would go out there and tell him that she was OK with it; that it was just a big drunken mistake that had been caused by both of them going temporarily insane. She would tell him that they should just forget about and not let it interfere with their friendship. She could do that, right? She could just forget about it and toss it off as meaningless. Sure, she'd never had meaningless sex before but that didn't mean she couldn't; there was a first time for everything. Everything would be OK; their bond was way too solid to break because of something as trivial as sex….right?

She got up off the bed, wrapping the top sheet around her naked body, and went to the closet to look for a robe or something to put on…it wasn't there. Her eyes nervously traveled around the room searching for something to alleviate her unfortunate case of nudity and she spotted the robe sticking out from under the bed. She picked it up and slipped it on. _OK, easy part over_, she thought to herself. Now it was time to face the music. She felt herself tremble with the thought of stepping out of that room and facing Logan. How crazy was that? He was her best friend; the one she always went to when anything in her life went wrong, and suddenly the mere thought of being in the same room as him made her feel horribly ill…although the hangover could be playing a part in that as well.

She walked slowly towards the door of the bedroom and turned the knob, but paused for a beat before pulling it open. When she finally found the courage, she slipped quietly into the suite's living room. There on the couch, at the other side of the room, was Logan, sitting hunched over with his head buried in his hands, staring intently at the floor. She took a deep breath and stepped out into the center of the room. "Hi," she said meekly.

"Hi," he responded. Silence. He continued to stare at the ground for a few seconds before taking one of his hands and pointing to a desk in the corner. "Coffee," he informed her. Making coffee was but a small peace offering but he had to do something, and besides, he knew well enough not to try to deal with a Hayden woman before she had coffee in her system.

"Thanks," came the terse reply. She padded over to the coffee maker and poured herself a cup, downing it in one gulp. She poured a refill and inhaled half of it before topping the cup up and making her way back over to the couch where Logan was apparently still studying his feet. "So…" she began, looking down at him.

"So," he replied, still avoiding her gaze.

She sat down on the opposite end of the couch from him. "We…?"

"Apparently so."

She nodded her head. "So…umm..." she continued, not really knowing how to proceed. Shouldn't Logan know what to say? He did one night stands all the time.

"Yeah, I've been sitting here for about an hour trying to figure out what comes after the umm."

"Well what usually comes after the umm?" she asked.

He finally picked his head up to look at her. "Usually?" he asked, wondering what in the hell about this situation could possibly be considered usual.

"During the 'morning after' conversation," she clarified.

"I don't know, Ace. I'm not really an expert in the field of morning after conversations since one generally has to _be_ there the morning after for them to occur."

She sighed. "Right, you don't usually stick around."

"Not so much," he admitted.

"Well, you did this time," she replied optimistically.

He looked at her as though she had a one giant eye in the middle forehead instead of two normal ones. "Are you serious? You really think I would just sneak out and leave you to fend for yourself?"

"No, and you didn't…so, at least we've got that going for us," she pointed out with fake cheeriness.

"How the hell are you so calm about this?" he yelled frustratedly. She was supposed to be the one freaking out, not him. He _needed_ her to freak out. At least them he could slip back into his "big brother" role and try to comfort her; at least then something would feel normal between them.

She wanted to scoff at the idiotic notion that she was even anywhere _close_ to calm, because on the inside she was far from it; in fact, she was so far from clam, that calm was off surfing at Finn's private beach near Sydney; but she had to keep up the façade so she just shrugged her shoulders. "What other choice do we have? Because frankly, Logan, freaking out isn't going to solve anything."

"So we're just supposed to pretend that it's a normal day? That nothing happened? Because I gotta tell you Rory, I'm not sure I can do that. I screwed up. I screwed up big time and I'm not sure how to fix this but it needs to be fixed."

"No, Logan. _You_ didn't screw up…_we _screwed up. Don't go blaming this all on yourself because I'm just as guilty. I don't remember everything that happened last night, but I do remember this— I wanted it. I wanted to feel wanted, if only just for a short while."

"_Exactly_! You were hurt, you were lonely, you were upset about Dean and I took advantage of that. God, I'm your best friend and I took advantage of you when you were drunk and confused. What kind of asshole _does_ that?"

"Stop it, Logan!" she insisted. "I will not have you talking about my best friend that way. You are _not_ an asshole and you _didn't_ take advantage of me. I may have been lonely but I wasn't stupid and I may have been drunk but so were you. We're equally guilty in this, Logan, and I won't have you putting this all your shoulders."

He sighed. He still thought it was entirely his fault; he should have been taking care of her; he should have been the responsible one, but fighting with her was futile. "So what now?"

"We get dressed and we go back to the right hotel," she replied.

"So that's it? We just pretend it never happened?"

"Why not? You do it all the time. It was just another night of meaningless sex— forget about it." Was she convincing him, or herself?

No, that wasn't going to fly. He couldn't just sit here and let her think that she was just some girl he used for a good lay; she was so much more than that. "Is that what you think? That it was just meaningless sex? Because if so, then you're crazy. It wasn't meaningless, Ace, you know why?" he paused briefly even though it was a rhetorical question. "Because _you're_ not meaningless. Our friendship—not meaningless. You can't have meaningless sex with someone who _means_ something, Ace. It just doesn't work that way."

"Fine then; tell me, Logan, what _did_ it mean?" _Please don't have answer, please don't have an answer,_ she silently begged. She needed to be right about this; she needed it to be meaningless because the thought of it actually meaning something scared the crap out of her. There was no way anything could come of what had happened between them, so it _had _to be meaningless.

"I…it…" he fumbled for something to say but came up empty handed. He had no clue what it meant, but he was sure it had to mean something. He wished to god it didn't. He wished that Rory could be right and that it could just be some meaningless…tryst, but it just wasn't that simple, was it? But if it wasn't meaningless then what was going to happen? They meant too much to each other for this to be the end of them; he would never let that happen, and they certainly couldn't become a couple; she was still getting over Dean and he didn't do relationships and if things didn't work out between them it would _really_ fuck things up. So no matter what it meant, it all came down to only one possible solution; they had to leave what ever had happened between them in memories of the previous night and just move on with their lives the way they had been. Maybe it had meant something last night but that was then and this was now and today they were just friends again…best friends. It was the way it had to be.

She breathed a silent sigh of relief when he couldn't answer her. "That's what I thought."

He looked at her—really, really looked at her—straight in the eye. "So you're OK with this?"

She forced herself to hold his gaze. "Yes." It wasn't really a lie, she _would_ be OK with it eventually; she just needed a little time.

She had been incredibly convincing to the point of being able to fool almost anyone, but he wasn't anyone and if he hadn't been so desperate to believe her, he would have noticed the way the pitch of her voice changed ever so slightly when she spoke. But he _had_ been desperate and so, just as anyone else would have, he missed it. "So…_we're_ OK?" he asked for confirmation.

"Mmmhmm," she replied with a nod.

He bit his lip and nodded his head. "OK," he said, accepting her words at face value and praying that they were true…not only for her but for him as well. He looked at the clock on the wall. "It's only 9AM; if we hurry up we can probably make it back to the Waldorf before anyone wakes up and notices we never made it back."

"I think that's best…avoid the questions on our whereabouts," she agreed.

"So, we should probably get dressed," he suggested.

"Yeah," she agreed. They both stood up and walked towards the bedroom, trying to ignore the awkwardness between them. "I'll...take the bathroom," she suggested, as she gathered up her dress.

"OK."

She walked off to the bathroom and shut the door behind her. She leaned up against the wall and took a few deep breaths. Everything was going to be OK, it _had _to be OK. The things she told Logan were all the truth, weren't they? It was meaningless. She could do this; she could do meaningless sex. Everything was going to be OK.


	9. Finncoction

Colin rode the elevator down to the lobby of the hotel. It was early but he hadn't had much to drink the previous night and he was usually an early riser. He had decided to go in search of some breakfast for himself and some hangover food for Steph when she woke up. The lift reached the lobby and opened up to reveal both Rory and Logan. He was certainly surprised to see them up so early considering they had been two of the drunkest ones last night. "Hey guys," he greeted them. "What are you doing up at…" He glanced at his watch. "9:45 in the morning?"

"Well…" Logan began, trying to figure out just what to say. Colin interrupted him before he had a chance to go any farther.

"Wait…" he had just noticed the duo's attire. "Why are you still in your party clothes? Are you just getting back?" He knew bars were open late in New York but there was no way they were out partying for hours after the sun rose.

"Well…see…umm… the thing is, in my drunken stupor last night--I uh, I kinda forgot we changed hotels." Sure, in his drunken and _horny_ stupor but he conveniently left that last part out.

"So…you went to the Plaza?" Colin asked, eyes narrowed suspiciously.

"Uh huh," Rory confirmed.

"And you stayed there?" Colin questioned, finding the situation more than a little strange.

"Well, it was a long ride back here and…uh…we didn't think we'd make it back before passing out, so…" That part, at least, was true.

Colin supposed this answer made sense; he had been witness to just how drunk they had been, after all. "Wow, I knew you were drunk but you must have been _seriously_ toasted to wind up at the wrong hotel and stay there."

"We were," Rory insisted.

"We were really, _really_ drunk," Logan added.

The entire situation seemed strange to Colin but his friends were usually strange so he had been willing just to write it off as some odd idiosyncrasy—until that moment. Something about Logan's last words struck a cord with Colin—he sounded almost guilty, like he was pleading with Colin for forgiveness of some transgression based on the amount of alcohol that had been fogging up his brain. And the more he thought about it, the more Colin made of the "uhs" and "umms" in Logan's words. He looked at the two appraisingly and noted that there was something off about their demeanors that was more than just a hangover. To someone who didn't know them so well, they would seem perfectly normal, but Colin could tell they weren't. They were usually touching; she would lean on his shoulder or he would put his hand on the small of her back to guide her, but not today. They were standing only inches apart but the space between them might as well have been a mile for all the implications it held. To Colin is seemed almost like…sexual tension. That was ridiculous though—what would cause sexual tension like that between two of the best of friends unless…No. Colin couldn't believe that…Logan would never do that to Rory and Rory, well she would never do that at all.

"Exactly how drunk _were_ you?" Colin asked, just to gauge their response.

Rory and Logan stole a quick glace at each other. "Very," they both replied, a little too adamantly for Colin's taste. He just couldn't shake this thought, no matter how insane he knew it was.

"Logan, can I talk to you for a minute?" Colin requested.

"Umm, yeah…" he paused, glancing up at Rory. "Let me just…" he pulled out his wallet and searched through it for something. He extracted a card and handed it to her. "It's room 1822."

She got on the waiting elevator, leaving the two boys alone. Colin pulled Logan into a nearby restroom, not wanting to have this conversation out in the open.

"What _really_ happened last night, Logan?" Colin asked.

"I told you, Colin, we accidentally went to the wrong hotel."

"And…?"

"'And' what?"

"And what happened when you got there?"

"We slept," Logan answered evasively…it wasn't a lie after all, they had slept—after the orgasms, that was.

Colin knew his friend was hiding something and he could only pray it wasn't what he thought it was. There was only one way to find out. "Give me your wallet," he demanded of Logan.

"What?" Logan asked incredulously.

"Hand it over," Colin insisted, holding his hand out to receive the requested item.

Logan sighed and pulled out his wallet. He wasn't as stupid as he was pretending to be; he knew what Colin was looking for and he knew what he wouldn't find. Reluctantly, he handed it over.

Colin sifted through Logan's credit cards and money and after a few moments he looked up with pure venom in his eyes. "It's not in here," he growled.

"What's not?" Logan asked, still playing dumb.

"What? The condom, Logan. The condom you _always_ have on hand in case you come across an easy lay," he yelled furiously, slamming the wallet to the ground.

"Hmm, I guess I must have forgotten to restock after the last time."

"Bullshit! I know you weren't exactly a boy scout, Logan, but you never took their 'always be prepared' motto for granted. You used it last night."

"That's ridiculous, I was with Rory all night." With those words, he'd just shot himself in the foot and he knew it instantly.

"_Exactly_! How the hell could you do this Logan? I can't believe you let your goddamn tree get happy in her forest. What the _HELL_ were you thinking?"

OK, skipping right over the weird tree thing...denial was no longer an option, time to get defensive. "Well gee, Colin. I guess I was thinking 'wow, I'm really horny and since it's always so hard for me to find an appropriate girl willing to help me with such a predicament, I should just go have mind-blowing sex with my best friend instead.'"

"_Mind-blowing_…?" Colin began to mutter. "Are you even _hearing_ the words that are coming out of your mouth? Mind-blowing sex, Logan? Did you seriously just say that? Cause I gotta tell you—I could have gone my whole life without ever hearing the words 'mind-blowing sex' used in reference to Rory and died a happy man. And hearing them come from you? Well that's just the icing on the cake. Are you aware that if anyone else was in your shoes and we found out about it that Finn and I would be holding him down while you cut his fucking balls off? How could you do this?"

"I don't know, Colin," Logan screamed back. "I thought I made it perfectly clear that I. Don't. Fucking. Know. It just…happened."

"God, what the hell is wrong with you? Aren't you even the least bit remorseful?"

"You think I'm not?" Logan asked incredulously. How could Colin even think that this didn't bother him? He loved Rory as much as he loved his own sister, Honor, and the thought that he had done something that could hurt her—could hurt _them_, was tearing him up inside. "You think I don't hate myself right now? You think I wouldn't give up everything just to undo this if I could?"

"Well, you can't, Logan. Do you have any idea what this could mean? A half a life time of friendship and you're willing to risk it all because you can't stop thinking with your dick for five fucking minutes?"

"That's not gonna happen," Logan insisted, hoping, more than anything, that he was telling the truth. "Rory and I talked; we agreed that it was a mistake, it didn't mean anything and we're not going to let this screw anything up. It's fine. We're…fine," his voice was beginning to crack.

Colin looked at him with utter disbelief. He was mad as hell but if Logan truly believed the words he'd just spoken, than he almost felt bad for the man. "Are you really that stupid? It's not fine, Logan. You and Rory are _not_ fine; if you were, do you really think I'd be standing here right now? No, we would have talked by the elevator, everything would have seemed normal and I'd have left, never being any wiser. Instead, I'm standing here in this goddamn bathroom with you because you can barely look at your best friend anymore."

"I know things are a little awkward right now but it'll get better."

"Get a clue, Logan," Colin scoffed. "It's not gonna get any better. This isn't one of your…floozies, we're talking about. This is Rory."

"I know who she is. I was drunk, not deaf, dumb and blind."

"Well than you know she doesn't _do_ one night stands. She's had sex with exactly one guy before you and he shattered her heart into a bazillion little, tiny pieces. If you think she's just going to get over this, than you're even stupider than I thought," he said, shaking his head. "I mean, do you seriously believe this isn't going to affect her?"

"I don't have a choice, Colin. I have to believe it because if I don't…I have to believe," he croaked out, his voice shaky.

"She deserved better than this." There was no hiding the disappointment in Colin's voice.

"I _know_. She deserves better than all of it. She deserved better than those asshats Jess and Dean, she deserves better than the losers like Robert who are constantly trying to get in her pants and she sure as _hell_ deserves better than to have her supposed best friend screw her over…pardon my really bad pun. She deserves so much better than any of this. What she deserves is probably not even out there, it's so damn perfect. And what she got stuck with, was me. But I'm not going to let anything happen because of this, Colin; she means too much to me. I can't lose her over this…she means too much."

"Oh my god," Colin groaned. He began pacing back and forth. This couldn't be happening. First that 'mind-blowing sex' comment that Colin was trying very hard to block from his memory and now a speech about how much Rory deserves and how much she means to him and worst of all, the moony look in his eyes as he said it. This couldn't be happening. "And here I thought_ she_ would be the one who couldn't handle this."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about your starry eyes and your poetic words and your very disturbing comments about…you know. You can't do this Logan. You can't just go and start developing feelings for her."

"You're crazy, I'm not developing feelings and if I was, I wouldn't start listening to lectures from _you _about it."

"Steph and I are different and you know it. I've never been the player that you are and Steph was never as vulnerable as Rory is right now, and besides the fact that I'm not you and Steph's not Rory—our relationship is different too. We've had more than platonic feelings for each other since we were old enough to realize that there were such things. You and Rory—you don't know what your getting yourselves into. You'll hurt her Logan. She trusts you explicitly and as much as you wouldn't want to hurt her…there are some things you just can't be trusted with."

Logan stared blankly at Colin for a moment. "I think I'm going to be sick." He bolted into one of the stalls and emptied his stomach. He leaned over the toilet for a minute, trying to regain his bearings. Colin came up behind him and handed him a wad of paper towels. Logan turned around and took them, wiping at his mouth.

"Thanks."

"Feeling better?" Logan nodded wearily in response. He didn't really feel better but he didn't think it was wise to complain to Colin at the moment.

"Good, now get your sorry ass upstairs and into a bed…_alone._ I can't stand to look at you any more right now."

Logan just stood up and walked quietly out of the bathroom.

* * *

Rory woke up to the pounding at the door. She turned over to glance at the clock, it was 11 o'clock, just barely an hour since she'd gone back to bed and it wasn't nearly enough to cure her hangover, but the knocking wouldn't stop. Pulling the covers off of her reluctantly, she padded her way to the door. 

"Morning, girlie," Steph smiled brightly.

Rory slammed the door in her face and the knocking immediately began again. "Cheery people aren't welcome," Rory called through the door. "Especially cheery people who went shot for shot with me and should be equally hung over."

"If you open the door, I'll tell you my secret," Steph promised in a singsong voice.

Rory groaned, and let Steph in. The bright-eyed, blonde held out a plastic bottle containing a viscous, brown liquid.

"If you tell me I have to drink that, I will vomit on you," Rory warned.

"I know it looks disgusting but Finn has perfected this concoction over the years, thanks to the inspiration of hundreds of hangovers. It works miracles. I drank mine about an hour ago when Colin came back to the room in a huff and woke me up with the slamming of many doors. I sent him away, went back to sleep for 45 minutes or so and…voila! You have the beautiful, cheery me, standing before you."

"Something was wrong with Colin?" Rory asked, trying to sound nonchalant. The last she had seen of him, he had been with Logan and a pissed of Colin very likely meant the conversation had gone in a way that would not be to Rory's liking.

"Yeah, but he wouldn't tell me what was wrong…and he didn't even have hangover food. If you asked me, he wasn't being a very good boyfriend."

"I'm sure it was nothing," Rory said nervously, hoping to deter Steph from asking him any questions about it later on. "If it were important he would have told you…Hey, have you seen Logan?" If Colin knew what had happened, it was very possible that some sort of bodily harm had come to his blond friend.

"Yeah, actually. Somehow Colin had wound up with his wallet and he asked me to drop it off to him on my way over here. Not sure why he couldn't do it himself…lazy bastard," she said the last past jokingly.

"And he was…OK?"

"Well he was about as cheery as you, Miss 'Let me slam the door in your face.'"

"But he was alive and…had all his appendages?"

"All the ones I could see. Why?"

"No reason."

"OK..." Steph looked at her strangely. "Well just drink your Finn-coction and I'll be back to pick you up at noon," she instructed.

"Pick me up?" Rory asked, confused.

"Yeah, remember? You, me, Julez, Rose, Sephora's, Cholé's, and our parents money."

"Right…shopping."

"Always."

"Right, then I should…" Rory pointed towards the bed.

"Yes, sleep—and make sure to drink all of that," Steph reminded her, pointing at Finn's hangover cure.

"Night."

"Bye," Steph exited the room, the door falling shut behind her.

Rory immediately made her way to the door separating her and Logan's adjoining rooms and began knocking furiously. About 30 seconds later, a very disgruntled looking Logan appeared at the threshold. "Ace?"

"He knows?" she asked.

"…Yeah."

"No black eyes or…" Her gaze shifted downwards. "Retained testicles?" she asked.

Logan felt the warmth rise to his face as he noticed where her eyes traveled but he pushed the thought away. "No, Ace. There were no punches or knees to the groin."

"And he's still talking to you?" She didn't want to be responsible for the demise of a life long friendship.

"He was pissed, I won't lie about that, but I'm pretty sure he hasn't completely forsaken me, or our friendship," Logan told her.

"Good," she raised her hand and slapped him upside the head.

"Ow!" He recoiled in exaggerated pain.

"How the heck could you tell him?"

"I didn't _tell _him. You think I have a death wish? He just sorta…knew."

"How is that possible?"

"We weren't exactly being stealthy when we ran into him, Ace."

Rory sighed, it was true. They had been rather conspicuous. "He didn't tell Steph," she informed Logan.

"I didn't think he would…more for your sake than mine, but still."

"Well…OK than. I should drink this," she held up the hangover cure. "And go back to sleep before Steph comes to get me and drags me up and down 5th Ave. all afternoon."

Logan's eyes went wide at the site of the bottle she held. "You have Finn-coction?" he grabbed for the bottle. "Gimme."

Rory retracted the bottle and pushed him away with her free hand. "Mine," she slammed the door closed. "Get your own Finn-coction." She drank down her potion, trying with all her might to keep it in her stomach, before shuffling back to the bed and collapsing onto it face first. Almost instantly she was asleep.


	10. Something to Prove

**AN: Not much to say except that I love all my reviewers, you guys are the best...keep it up :)**

* * *

"Ooh, this place looks good," Stephanie said excitedly, pulling the girls into a little boutique on 5th Avenue.

"Steph, it's getting late, don't you think it's time to go back to the hotel? Or at least stop for some dinner?" Rory asked. The Finn-coction had been a life saver in terms of helping with the hangover but it wasn't helping with the 5 hours of restless sleep, not to mention that she was feeling pretty sore from the previous night's activities.

"Nope, not until we've found you the perfect outfit for tonight. We're going to the hottest club in New York City, Rory. I've heard that Paris Hilton parties here. You can't show up just wearing any old thing."

Rory stopped walking and put her hands to her hips. "Are you telling me that my clothes suck?"

"Of course not, hun. It's just that they're a bit…conservative."

"So I have to dress like Paris Hilton to go to a Paris Hilton hang out?" she asked, following Stephanie, Rosemary and Juliet into the store anyway.

Steph shook her head as she poured through the racks. "I wouldn't go that far, we don't need you getting arrested for indecent exposure…Oh, here Rose, try this on," she pulled a kelly green, silk, halter top off the rack and handed it to the redhead.

"Pretty," Rose declared with a smile.

Steph continued to look through the clothing, seemingly noticing nothing else. She stopped suddenly and slowly turned around to face Rory. "OK, now I need you to keep an open mind."

"Oh no."

"I know it's a little short but…"

"Stephanie."

"Just try it on Rory. You have awesome legs." She turned to the other two. "Doesn't she have awesome legs?"

"I've been starving myself for years and don't have legs half as good as yours," Juliet agreed.

Rory rolled her eyes and refrained from reminding Juliet that starving herself was probably the reason her legs weren't what she wanted them to be. "Let me see," Rory relented.

"Nope, you have to promise to try it on before I show it to you."

"Fine, I will try it on but I make no promises beyond that."

"Yay! Here," Steph pulled out a black skirt with a black lace overlay and handed it to Rory who held it up to her waist, trying to figure out if it would cover her butt at all.

"Well, you weren't lying when you said it was short."

"You're _going_ to try it on," Steph insisted.

"I said I would, didn't I?"

"Good." The girls all turned their attention back to the clothing and continued combing through the inventory. After they had been browsing for a while, they all had their arms loaded with clothing to try on; they were almost ready to head to the fitting room but Steph insisted they find the perfect top to go with the skirt she'd picked out for Rory.

"How about this?" Juliet suggested, pulling something off a rack and holding it up.

"No!" Rory immediately declined.

Steph ignored her protests. "It's incredible, Rory."

"It's practically lingerie." The top was a sky blue, satin, corset top with a line of black lace up the center where the clasps were.

"Look, the lace on the shirt is the same as the lace on the skirt, it's perfect," Rosemary gave her input.

"Guys, the skirt is bad enough, I can't wear that too."

"You can do anything you set your mind to." Rory rolled her eyes at Steph's cheesy remark.

"If I try it on, will that shut you guys up." The three other girls shrugged their shoulders and agreed; they knew it was probably the best offer they'd get from Rory. Juliet handed her friend the skirt and they headed off to the dressing room.

* * *

Rory looked at herself up and down in the mirror of the dressing room. Maybe the girls were right, maybe she did have good legs and she never knew she could have so much cleavage. She was still fairly uncomfortable in the outfit but if she was completely honest with herself, she knew she looked good.

"Are you coming out of there some time today?" Steph called.

Rory sighed. "I'm coming, I'm coming." She pulled the curtain aside and stepped out in front of her friends.

"Wow! You look so hot _I_ want to have sex with you," Steph replied.

"Stephanie!" Rory rolled her eyes at her friend.

"What? I'm secure enough in my sexuality to admit that and I doubt Colin would be offended."

"You do not want to have sex with me, Steph."

"Fine," the blonde girl relented. "Maybe _I_ don't want to have sex with you but if I was a straight guy and not your best friend, I totally would."

"Yeah, and maybe even if you were my best friend," Rory mumbled under her breath.

"What was that?" Steph asked, hearing Rory say something but not completely catching what it was.

"Nothing."

Steph looked at her strangely. That hadn't been a 'nothing' kind of mumble. "You're sure?" she asked. "I could have sworn I heard you say something."

"Nope."

"Is there something you're not telling me?"

"I didn't say anything Steph, just drop it," Rory said defensively.

Steph was sure now that it had been something and Stephanie Vanderbilt was not a girl who liked not knowing what was going on; she was still mad at Colin for not telling her what had him so upset all morning. She knew that Rory would only continue to get more defensive if she pried, however, so Steph let it drop, figuring she would give Rory a chance to forget about it and she would pick up with some more subtle prying later. "Fine, now about this outfit—I'm going to need you to spin for me."

Rory did as she was instructed. "Well, what do you guys think?"

"You look hot, Ror." Rosemary told her.

"You think?" she asked skeptically.

"All the boys are going to want you, hun," Steph insisted.

Rory bit her lip thoughtfully. All the boys would want her, huh? It had felt good to be wanted. She suddenly remembered the exact moment in the taxi when she had realized she was turning Logan on. She had felt almost…powerful. She had the power to affect him—his body and his mind. And if it didn't feel good enough to know he wanted her—when he finally had her…Maybe there was something behind this casual sex thing after all—all the good feelings without the heart break at the end; she didn't think she could take the heart break anymore. She looked at herself in the three way mirror in front of her and smiled; all the discomfort associated with wearing such a revealing outfit was gone. All the boys were going to want her.

"Well then, who am I to deny them the pleasure of checking me out? Maybe I'll even grant a few of them a dance." She smiled wickedly.

The girls looked at her in shock…Had Rory seriously just said that? It was such an un-Rory like thing to say.

Stephanie smiled at Rory proudly. "I think all those years spent trying to corrupt you, have finally paid off."

* * *

Rory, Logan, Colin and Stephanie stepped out of the cab they had shared. Colin had subtly insisted that Logan take the front seat and the other three had crammed into the back for the ride to the club.

As they stepped onto the sidewalk, Rory took in the long line outside the bar and sighed. "Wow, look at that line, it's going to take us forever to get in."

Logan chuckled at her naivety. Rory may have come from two very rich and influential families but her parents had chosen to raise her in a small town where people didn't care about her last name. Because of this, she often forgot just how powerful that name could be. "I wouldn't worry about it, Ace," he told her, placing his hand on the small of her back and guiding her directly to the front of the line. Colin took note of the gesture and coughed, then sent a pointed glare at Logan. Logan saw the disapproving look on Colin's face and took his hand back.

The entire group approached the bouncer and told him their names. He looked at the clip board in his hand, checking off their names as he found them. He unclasped the velvet rope and let them in.

"We were on the list? That's so cool. I thought only famous people and friend's of somebodies got to be on the list," Rory said excitedly, unbuttoning her knee length coat to give to the people at the coat check.

As the coat slid off her shoulders revealing the outfit beneath, Logan's jaw dropped. If he had thought the dress she'd had on last night had been revealing—it was nothing compared to this. The dress had been reasonable, something he could at least understand her getting coerced into but this outfit was nothing like anything Rory would normally dream of wearing. Sure, she looked good—amazing in fact, but then again, that was the problem—on more than one level.

"Come on Steph, let's go to the bar and get a drink," Rory suggested. Logan was stunned again; drinking wasn't something Rory did often and after last night he was sure it would be quite some time before she dared to get drunk again, yet here she was, in the club for barely two minutes and already headed for the bar. "You boys coming?"

"Yes," Logan started to say. He wasn't keen to let Rory out of his sight; he was sure the second he did the guys in the club would be all over her.

"No," Colin spoke over him. "Logan and I are gonna go find a table first." He grabbed Logan's arm and pulled him in a direction opposite that of the girl's.

"What the hell, Colin?" Logan asked incredulously. Didn't he see what she was wearing? They had to follow her before the gaggle of horny guys all around started pawing at her.

"It's for your own good, Logan. I saw the way you looked at her just then, and there is no way in _hell _you are going there again." Colin wasn't about to let his friend screw things up even more than he already had.

"It's not like that Colin, I told you it was nothing, just a mistake. There was _no_ look. The only look was the 'what the hell were you thinking when you put on that 'come and rape me' outfit' look,' Logan argued.

"Don't even go there. As far as I'm concerned you lost the right to the over-protective big-brother attitude the second your lips touched hers—and don't even get me started on all the rights you lost when other parts of your anatomy came in contact." Logan couldn't fool him; he could see the real reason he was freaking out about Rory's outfit.

"So you're OK with what she's wearing?"

"No, but there's nothing we can do about it now. I will keep an eye out for her and make sure she's all right."

"I'm her sponsor; it's my job to look after her this weekend."

"Yeah," Colin scoffed. "Because you did such and excellent job of looking after her last night. I don't care of you're her sponsor, I don't care if you're her goddamn guardian angel—until you can get your libido in check, just maintain as much distance as possible."

"Damn it Colin, how many times do I have to tell you that I don't want her like that. Last night was just some weird fluke or something…some really, really bad, weird fluke that is never, ever, EVER going to happen again."

"You can lie to yourself all you want Logan; you can lie to her too—it's probably best she doesn't know the truth—but you can't lie to me. I'm not stupid, Logan. You're looking at her differently; you're thinking about her differently. You may think I hate you right now but you're still my friend and I'm looking out for your well being here as well as hers. If you let something happen again and throw things even farther off kilter then if there ever was any hope of getting things back to the way there were, it'll be gone."

"I'm not lying, I'm—"

"I don't want to hear it. Just sit here and save the table," Colin ordered, pushing Logan towards an empty booth. "I'm going to get us some drinks."

Logan sat down at the table, sulking silently as Colin walked off. Everything was so screwed up.

He sat at the table alone for a few minutes until Stephanie appeared, sliding into the booth next to him. "Hey Logan, why the pouty face? I figured you'd be eating up the NYC night life. Lots of scantily clad women around to suck face with and all."

Logan looked up at her with a scowl. He wasn't in the mood for her peppy attitude and speaking of scantily clad women…"Where's Rory?"

"Oh she's chatting up some hottie at the bar," Steph told him with a smirk.

"What?!" He started sliding out of the booth. He didn't care what Colin said, he had to go find her before Steph's so called 'hottie' decided to engage in some inappropriate touching with his best friend.

"Will you calm down Logan. Seriously, they're just talking; it's not like they're getting it on in the bathroom," Steph rolled her eyes at her friend.

"Yeah well, I've had some experience 'getting it on in the bathroom' and I gotta tell you, every one of those incidents has started with 'just talking.'" Logan pushed himself the rest of the way out of the booth and stood up.

"Where are you going?" Colin asked, approaching the table with a couple of glasses of scotch.

"Did you see Rory at the bar?" Logan asked, instead of answering Colin.

"No, why?"

"Oh, that's just great. I feel so much better knowing that you've usurped my role as her sponsor and taken on the responsibility of looking after her," Logan spat at him. Just great; Colin didn't know where she was and according to Stephanie, where she was, was with some random guy who probably had all sorts of disgusting ideas about what he wanted to do to her.

"Yeah, because you did a much better job of it."

"Wow, down boys," Steph remarked, watching the interaction between the two guys. "First of all, why is Colin taking over the sponsor role?"

"Because Logan sucks at it," Colin answered petulantly.

"I screwed up, OK. I know that, but it's not gonna happen again. I'm perfectly capable of taking care of her."

"OK, sit, both of you," Steph commanded. Logan and Colin sent each other glares then shifted their gaze to Stephanie, who wasn't looking too happy. They both did as they were instructed. "Good. Now listen up. Something is clearly going on here, anyone want to tell me what it is?"

There was silence from the boys.

"Fine, I'm sure I'll figure it out eventually, Colin can only go so long with out sex. In the mean time, you two better figure this out because I am not about to put up with these attitudes tomorrow when we're all stuck in a car with you. And I'm not really sure how Rory fits into this but I will tell you this—she doesn't need you to 'take care of her.' It's the sponsor's job to hold her hair back if she gets so drunk she starts puking; it's the sponsor's job to make sure she doesn't mix her liquors; it's the sponsor's job to make sure she makes it back to the hotel alright…" Steph noticed Colin turn to glare at Logan when this statement was made.

"OK, that…that right there…" Steph said. "What was that all about?"

"Nothing," Logan insisted.

"Oh well, Logan just conveniently happened to forget that we were staying at the Waldorf this year instead of the Plaza."

"Colin!" Logan yelled.

Stephanie looked from one boy to the other, suspiciously. "So that's what this is about? They went to the wrong hotel? Whatever, they both made it back to their rooms eventually; I saw them both this morning. She's alive, she didn't end up in jail, she wasn't mugged or raped; she's fine. Get over it Colin. I know you both have this crazy, protective thing going on with Rory, like she's your pseudo little sister or something…only she's not little. She's twenty years old. Being a bit protective is all good and well but you guys are going totally overboard. She doesn't need a baby sitter. Seriously, Colin, you're picking a fight with your best friend because you're not satisfied with the way he took care of her?"

"Oh no, he took care of her alright," Colin said sarcastically. "He took care of her just fine."

"I'm too fed up to even ask what the hell that's supposed to mean," Stephanie sighed. "Logan," she turned her attention to the blond. "She's just talking to a guy. Just because talking leads to screwing for you, doesn't mean it's true for Rory too. You can't shield her from every guy on the face of the planet, that's taking this protective thing too far."

"Protective/possessive, potato/patato," Colin muttered.

"Seriously Colin, what is with the cryptic tonight? Why the hell would Logan be possess…" Stephanie trailed off, looking from Logan towards the bar where she knew Rory was, even though she couldn't see her. They went to the wrong hotel, Logan was acting 'possessive' not 'protective' and Colin was waaaaay too mad at Logan for something as innocent as a wrong destination. Not to mention Rory's strange comment at the store earlier and her 'new' attitude. "Oh my god, they had sex."

Logan's face went completely white. "How the hell does she do that?" he asked Colin.

"I have no clue, it's kind of creepy."

Stephanie looked at Logan and Colin in awe. One second they were completely at each other's throats, and the next they were having a completely normal exchange as though nothing was wrong. Boys were weird.

"Focus," Steph instructed them. They turned to look at her. "You had _sex_ with Rory?" she asked for confirmation.

"I swear, Steph, I don't know how it happened," Logan pleaded with her.

"I don't care about that," she dismissed him.

"You don't?"

"Well no, of course I do, but I'll find that out from her later. Right now there are more pressing issues. What happened after?"

"Steph…I don't…" Logan stuttered.

"Not immediately after," she rolled her eyes. "This morning. Did you two talk about it?"

"No, we just decided to mime to each other all day," Logan replied sarcastically. "Of course we talked."

"And what did you decide?"

"We decided that it was mistake. That it didn't mean anything and that we wouldn't let it come between us."

"Oh boy."

"'Oh boy' what?"

"Tell me you didn't. _Tell_ me you didn't say that. Tell me you didn't say it was meaningless."

"Well, I made sure that she knew that _she_ wasn't meaningless," he defended himself.

"Great, and here I thought I'd finally rubbed off on her. Turns out this is all _your_ fault."

"What's all my fault?"

"I have to go do some damage control, try not to cause any more trouble while I'm gone." Steph stood up from the table and disappeared into the crowd.

After a few minutes she found Rory on the dance floor with the guy from the bar. She watched her friend's uncharacteristically seductive moves for a moment before sighing; this was bad. "Rory, can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Hi Steph!" she greeted her friend with a smile. "This is Joe," she pointed to her dance partner. "Joe, this is Steph."

"Hi," Joe smirked at Stephanie.

"OK, that image that just flashed through your head…the one that involved both of us naked in your bed…you can just erase that from your thoughts right now because neither one of us is going home with you tonight, let alone both of us," Steph told him bluntly. "Now if you don't mind, I need to steal your dance partner away."

"And if I do mind?"

"Well that's just too fucking bad. Come on Rory." She grabbed her friend's arm and pulled her off towards the bathroom.

"Bye!" Rory waved at Joe as Steph dragged her away. "It's been fun."

They reached the bathroom and Stephanie pushed Rory through the swinging door. "How the hell could you not tell me you had sex with Logan?" Steph cut straight to the chase the second the door shut behind them, drowning out the pulsating beats of the music beyond.

Rory's jaw dropped in shock. "How…" she began to ask but she realized that she knew how. "Colin had no right to tell you that."

"Oh give it a break, Colin didn't tell me. I put it all together myself. He and Logan were fighting and then Colin called him possessive, plus all three of you have been weird all day and there was the comment you made when we were shopping about sex and your best friend. Plus the new attitude and the wardrobe change…It doesn't take a genius Rory."

"You picked this outfit out for me," Rory exclaimed. Was she serious? Stephanie was always the one pushing her to dress sexier and be flirtier and now she was throwing it back in her face?

"I wanted you to wear it because I wanted you to feel confident enough in yourself to show a little skin; I wanted you to talk to that guy because I wanted you to open up and stop being so shy. I didn't want you throwing yourself at guys just to prove a point," Steph explained.

"And what point would that be?" Rory asked, crossing her arms over her chest defensively.

"That you're capable of meaningless sex."

"I don't have to prove that point Steph; I proved it last night with Logan. And you know what? It felt good. For the first time in a long time I was able to forget about Dean. I was able to forget that I wasn't good enough for him because I was finally good enough for someone, even if it was just for one night. And OK, maybe Logan wasn't the best choice of bed mate but that doesn't matter now because what's done is done and I'm moving on. Oh and by the way, from now on you can refrain from telling guys whether or not I'll be accompanying them home; it's none of your business." Rory moved to circumvent Stephanie and walk out of the bathroom but the blonde girl stopped her.

This was worse that she thought. She knew Rory had been hurt when Dean had left her but she never thought she would let it affect her like this.

"Let me go," Rory demanded.

"You're not going anywhere until you hear what I have to say."

"I'm not in the mood for a lecture, Stephanie."

"That's just too damn bad because you're going to get one…You're an idiot Rory."

"Hey!" she protested.

Steph ignored her. "You're an idiot if you think some stupid, unworthy guy's opinion of you determines whether or not you're good enough. Since when are you the kind of person who determines her self worth by whether or not guys want to have sex with her? Because here's a tip Rory…most straight guys want to have sex with anything that walks on two legs and has a vagina—all you have to do it put the signs out there…"

"Well then, if you'll excuse me, I have some signs to go put out." Rory made another attempt for the door.

Steph stopped her again. "Just because you walk out that door, doesn't mean this is over; I know where you live. You can go out there and take part in all the shallow, pointless dancing and flirting you want but don't even think of leaving this club with some random guy. You're going back to the hotel with us tonight…your friends…the people who actually care about you and not how long your legs are or how big your boobs are."

"I can decide for myself when and with whom I leave here tonight."

"I swear to god, Rory. I have Lorelai's number programmed into my phone."

"You wouldn't."

"Oh I would. How do you think she'll take it when she finds out her baby girl has disappeared with some strange guy in the Big Apple? Because I wouldn't put it passed her to drive down here and knock on every door in New York until she finds you. She will then drag your sorry ass home and proceed to lecture you way more than I ever could."

"Fine," Rory harrumphed with a roll of her eye. Damn Stephanie for knowing her so well. She knew how much Rory hated to disappoint her mother. Rory never felt as low as she did when she had to hear a lecture from Lorelai. Lorelai had always wanted to go to college, to get a job, and then to leave Hartford and make it on her own, free from the confines of high society and all the expectations, but when she got pregnant, she gave up on her dreams to make sure that her daughter would have the options and the life that she never had. Rory respected her mother more than any other person in the world and Stephanie knew that Rory would never personally do anything to let her down.

"Good. Now you can go for now but don't even think this is over."

Rory glared dangerously at her friend before leaving the bathroom without another word.

* * *

**So I know, not much in the way of actual Rogan interaction in this chapter. There was supposed to be but the chapter was getting ridiculously long and I wasn't even close to finishing so I decided to cut it off here and just make what was originally supposed to be one chapter into two. So I hope you enjoyed it anyhow, please leave a review :)**


	11. Going Kung Fu on His Ass

**AN: Have I told you lately that I love you? Have I told you there are no reviewers above you? You fill my heart with gladness, take away all my saddness, ease my trouble, that's what you do.**

**OK, so that was my ode to you...my lovely reviewers. You guys are awesome, keep the reviews coming.**

* * *

"Did you talk to her?" Logan asked impatiently the second Stephanie appeared back at the table.

"I talked to her."

"Talked to who?" Finn asked. He had come to the club with Rosemary, Juliet and Seth and had finally made his way over to the rest of the group.

Logan ignored the Australian sitting next to him. "And…?" he asked Stephanie.

"And….it's sort of under control for now."

"What's under control?" Finn asked, he was ignored again

"Sort of? What the hell does that mean?"

"It means things are screwed up pretty badly, Logan. She thinks she has something to prove but I at least made sure she won't be proving anything tonight."

"Who has something to prove, Love?" Finn directed to Stephanie this time.

"Oh, well that's reassuring," Logan said angrily. He knew the person he was really angry at was himself—not Colin or Stephanie but he couldn't help himself.

"What the bloody hell is going on?" Finn yelled, fed up with the lack of answers.

Steph turned to him. "Logan slept with Rory," she informed him as though she were taking about something as mundane as the weather.

All the color drained from Logan's face and he stared at Finn like a deer caught in the head lights. Finn's face was completely blank and then, all of a sudden, he began laughing hysterically.

"Oh, that's good. You almost had me there, Love. Logan and Rory, like that would ever happen." Finn's laughter finally died down and he turned to his blond friend with a smile. "You have thirty seconds to prove to me that she was joking or start running, either way—I suggest you act fast," he said in the sweetest voice he could manage.

"Finn, I can explain…it wasn't…I didn't…" Logan had no clue what to say and so he decided to go with the next best option…running. He moved to stand up from the table but Colin grabbed him by the arm and pulled him back down.

"You're not running away from this, Logan." He looked across the table at Finn. "Finn, try to refrain from going kung-fu on Logan's ass. And Stephanie," he turned to the last person in the group…"How about we don't tell any more people about this."

"Oh come on, it was Finn. You really think the four of us can all know something and keep it from him?"

"Whatever, just…no one else knows."

Finn was staring angrily at Colin now. "You knew about this?" he growled.

"I figured it out this morning," Colin admitted.

"You knew what he did and yet he's sitting here with us right now instead of in the emergency room?"

"Stop with the dramatics, Finn. You know you're not going to hurt him either…you're a lover, not a fighter." Colin knew that Logan probably deserved anything Finn could throw at him, and even Colin wasn't done letting Logan know how badly he screwed up, but Finn had a tendency to get overly dramatic and it always fell to Colin to keep his friend at a reasonable level of insanity.

"The bloody hell, I'm not. I'm going to kick his scrawny American ass. If we were in Australia they'd be giving him the boot."

"Yes if we were in Australia and he was a cartoon character with a paper bag shaped head. But we're in the real world, Finn, and in the real world we already knew that Logan was a screw up…"

"Hey!"

Colin continued, despite the interruption. "So you can yell and scream and threaten him all you want, I know I have, but let's at least try and remember that he's been your friend since the first time you stepped foot on American soil when you were seven."

"Fine," Finn pouted. "But I'm still pissed as hell."

"As you should be…"

"And I am reserving the right to give him the silent treatment for at least a couple of days."

"Fair enough."

"And if he touches her again…"

"He won't."

"I really didn't mean for this to happen Finn, I swear…"

"I'm sorry, did either of you hear something?" Finn asked, pretending Logan wasn't there.

The group at the table rolled their eyes. "Come on, Logan," Steph said. "Let's dance," she suggested. She thought he could use a break from the bitterness at the table. Colin had defended him to Finn because acting as the mediator was what Colin did, and Finn had agreed not to attack Logan, but she knew they were both still upset with him.

Logan looked at Stephanie and saw her give him a small smile. It was comforting to know not everyone hated him. "Yeah, sure," he agreed, standing up from the booth and taking Steph's hand. Besides, by dancing with Steph maybe he'd have to opportunity to find out more about how Rory was doing and what was going on with her. He hated the thought that she was acting out because of what had happened between them. If he knew exactly what was going on with her, maybe he could figure out how to fix it.

The pair of friends made their way out to the dance floor and began swaying to the beat. "So, what exactly did Rory say?" Logan asked her, not bothering to beat around the bush. He knew Stephanie wouldn't be offended; she was the definition of 'blunt' herself.

"Huh?" she gave him a quizzical look.

"Rory?" Logan tried again.

"I can't hear you," she mouthed exaggeratedly, tugging on her ear and then pointing to the DJ booth to indicate that the music was too loud.

"I was asking about Rory…" he mimicked her act of mouthing out the words.

Steph shrugged her shoulders. She really couldn't hear anything. "Just dance," she instructed with dismissive wave of her hand. She did a crazy little jig to illustrate her words.

Logan rolled his eyes at the girl and chuckled a little. Steph was crazy. He was disappointed they couldn't talk but at least she could make him laugh. Perhaps it was best just to try and not think about things right now anyway.

The dancing continued for a few songs until Logan got tired. "I'm gonna go sit down," he yelled to Steph, pointing towards where their table was…or maybe their table was the other way…or was it off to the left? He spun around, trying to remember where their friends were sitting until his eyes landed on something that made him stop in his tracks. His eyes narrowed in anger, his lips pursed up into a scowl and his breathing got heavy. He looked like a bull getting ready to charge.

"Logan," Steph said, even though he couldn't hear her over the music. She placed her hand on his shoulder comfortingly and tried to guide him back the other way but he refused to budge. She grabbed his hand and tried to gently tug it in the direction she wanted him to go but he pulled out of her grasp and stomped across the dance floor towards the couple grinding lewdly a few yards away.

Logan grabbed Rory by the arm and pulled her away from the guy who had been, basically, coping a feel. He dragged her to a spot far enough away from the speakers that she'd be able to hear him.

"What the hell, Rory?"

Before Rory could speak her dance partner butted in. "Excuse me, the lady and I were dancing."

Logan turned to the guy and glared angrily.

"Sorry man, didn't know she was taken," he replied, backing away slowly with his hands up in front of him.

"I'm not taken," Rory said defensively. "God, Logan. You'd think after everything that happened last night you'd stop treating me like a little kid. I'm a grown woman in charge of my own life so stop butting in and leave me alone."

"I'm not going to just sit idly by and watch you throw away everything that you are. This isn't you, Rory. I know we got carried away last night but this isn't the answer."

"Oh yay; the infamous Huntzberger ego strikes again. News flash, Logan, not everything is about you. Maybe I've just realized that I don't want to be that shy, insecure little girl anymore. And the only thing about that that has to do with you is that you're the one that taught me I don't have to be. So thank you, Logan, but your job is done. Now if you'll excuse me, Brian and I have a dance to finish." She motioned to the guy she had been dancing with. She turned away from Logan and strung her arm through Brian's but Logan immediately reached out and grabbed her, spinning her back to him.

"So you're just going to walk away from me?"

Rory shook herself out of Logan's grasp. "There's nothing more to discuss. Stop acting like an idiot and just leave me alone." She turned away again and Logan tried to stop her once more but Brian spun around this time.

"She told you to leave her alone."

"Stay out of this," Logan growled.

"I don't think I will. She made her choice and it isn't you. Get over it," he said, slipping his arm around Rory's waist.

Logan wasn't sure what came over him; he just snapped and the next thing her knew his fist was flying through the air and then, making contact with Brian's face. The only thing Logan regretted was that the music had drowned out the satisfying 'crunch' that had inevitably gone along with the breaking of the jerk's nose.

Brian swung back and Logan dodged the punch, taking another swing of his own. A few more punches were made before Colin and Finn rushed up, pulling Logan off the other man. Stephanie had gone to get them as soon as Logan had approached Rory; she knew something bad was going to happen.

Colin and Finn were still struggling to restrain Logan when four club security guards made their way through the crowd that had assembled. Each guard grabbed one of the arms of the men responsible for the fight.

"Time to break it up punks," one of the guards said as he began pulling the men off the dance floor.

"Hey! Where are you taking him?" Rory rushed after them. "What's going on? Are you kicking him out?"

The guards holding Logan stopped and turned around. "The cops have been called, lady," one of them informed her.

"The cops? You're having him_ arrested_?"

The guard that spoke looked behind him where the fight had just occurred. "There doesn't appear to be and damage so the club probably won't press any charges but he's still gonna have to go down to the precinct. The rest depends on whether the other guy wants to pursue assault charges."

"_Assault_?" She turned to Logan. "God damn it, Logan. What the hell were you thinking? This is serious. And now _we're_ going to have to go down to the jail and bail you out. And if you do get charged then we're going to have to call Andrew," she said, referring to Colin's father, who happened to be a very prominent lawyer whose firm handled many celebrity clients. "Don't you think he's got his hands full dealing with all of his paying clients without having to worry about the messes you get into?"

Logan didn't have anything to say so he just stood there and let her yell. He knew he screwed up—again, but he just couldn't deal with everything falling apart around him. Colin and Finn were mad at him, Rory was apparently having a severe identity crisis, and the weekend that was supposed to be filled with friends, good drunken times and lots of hot girls had turned into a weekend of alienating the people he cared about, drowning his sorrows in scotch and sulking over the one girl he should never, ever have had any non-platonic feelings for. Everything was wrong and he didn't know how to make it right again and he had just lost it.

"We're gonna have to take him now," the guard told Rory, before leading Logan the rest of the way off the dance floor and disappearing into a back room somewhere. Rory just stood there and watched. Stephanie approached her and put a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

"What the hell is his problem?" she choked out.

"I think you know, hun."

"No, seriously; one night I'm adult enough to well…you know and then as soon as it's someone else's hands on me he goes right back to thinking of me like some naïve, innocent little girl? It doesn't work that way."

"No, it doesn't," Steph confirmed.

"So then I repeat, 'what the hell is his problem?'"

"He isn't thinking of you like that anymore, Rory; exactly the opposite, in fact."

"What the heck is that supposed to mean?"

Steph chuckled a little at her friend. Rory may have suddenly taken to not acting 'innocent and naïve', and Logan may not be seeing her that way anymore, but that didn't mean that in a lot of was, she wasn't. "Come on, let's get our stuff and go back to the hotel, I'll explain it on the way there."

"Yeah, except that we have to go bail Logan out," she replied angrily.

Steph looked over her shoulders at Colin and Finn. They shook their heads in understanding.

"The boys'll take care of it," Steph promised.

Rory sighed, she was too upset and angry to deal with Logan anymore that night anyhow. "Alright," she agreed. "Let's go."

* * *

Logan walked into the hotel room and flopped down on his bed. Colin and Finn and come and gotten him from jail but they hadn't spoken a word to him the entire ride back. Luckily, they didn't have to post any bail since all the charges had been dropped. The guy was going to press charges at first but all it took was one mention of the fact that Colin's father represented 50 Cent to have the guy insisting that he was never all that fond of his nose anyhow.

Logan was so exhausted that he contemplated not even getting changed and just passing out right there on top of the covers. As soon as he closed his eyes, however, he became aware of soft muffled voices floating through the wall between his room and Rory's. She never fell asleep with the TV on so he knew she was still awake.

He pulled himself up off the bed and walked over to the doors between their rooms. He knocked for a few seconds but heard no signs of movement in the other room. "Come on, Rory, I know you're awake. You can't ignore me forever. Please, just open the door." After a few more seconds he heard footsteps and he breathed a sigh of relief, until the piece of paper slipped under the door.

"_I'm not speaking to you._

_Go away."_

Groaning frustratedly, he banged his head against the door, but only let the self pity consume him for a moment. He wasn't going to give up; she was going to talk to him. He started banging on the door more fervently.

After about a minute the door swung open forcefully. "What part of 'go away' didn't you understand?" she asked frustratedly, her arms crossed over her chest, he fuzzy, pink slipper clad foot tapping impatiently.

"I'm not going away, not until you let me apologize."

She sighed and leaned against the door frame. There was silence for a moment. "Well?"

"Oh, you want me to start now?"

"Isn't that why you were knocking furiously at my door at 1 o'clock in the morning?"

"I was waiting for confirmation before I started," he argued.

She rolled her eyes. "Just say what it is you have to say, already. And Logan…"

"Yeah?"

"It better be one hell of an apology."

Logan took a deep breath, trying to figure out where to begin. He decided that the actual 'I'm sorry,' was probably a pretty good bet. "I'm sorry, Rory." He paused…apparently starting was easier than finishing.

"That's it?" she asked him incredulously.

"No," he insisted.

"Well then, by all means, continue. I would like to get to bed sometime tonight."

"It wasn't supposed to be like this Rory. Last night, we both agreed it didn't mean anything. We weren't supposed to let it affect us."

"I'm not the one who's letting it affect us," she argued.

"Are you serious? Rory, look at you." She looked down at her bathrobe, ducky pajamas and pink slippers, then back up at him questioningly.

"Ok, well not 'look at you' right this second. But earlier, at the club. That wasn't you."

"What I wear and who I dance with has nothing to do with you, Logan. It has nothing to do with us. _We_ were fine before we got to that club. Then you had to go start acting all crazy. If I didn't know any better I'd think Stephanie was right."

"Right about what?"

"You—being jealous."

"I am _not_ jealous," he replied defensively.

"I didn't say you were; I said if I didn't know any better I'd think you were. You started a flipping bar fight, Logan. A bar fight! You broke some guy's nose, you embarrassed us all, you got _arrested_. And why? All because you didn't like me dancing with some other guy? What were you thinking?"

"Well gee, maybe I was thinking that I didn't want you to get raped, or murdered or kidnapped or something. You can't just go off and sleep with random guys, Rory. It's not safe."

"Why not? You go off and sleep with random girls all the time."

"That's different."

"Oh, really? I'd love to hear how."

"Well for starters, I'm a guy."

Rory stood there, mouth hanging open in awe. "What?" he asked her defensively.

"I think your double standard's showing," she said pointing at him accusatorily.

"It's not a double standard, Rory. It's the truth. That guy was twice your size. If he got you alone and he wanted to hurt you—there's nothing you could have done to stop him."

"You know what? I take it back."

"Take what back?"

"You are jealous."

"You're crazy."

"You wanted it to be you," she said, taking the octave of her voice down a notch. She stepped towards him and he went to step away but realized that his back was up against the door frame.

"That's insane," he chocked out.

"You wanted to be the one getting all hot and sweaty with me on the dance floor." She stepped closer to him again, pressing her body up against his."

"You don't know what you're talking about," he gulped.

"The thought that I might go home with him was tearing you up inside, because you didn't want me in anyone's bed but yours." Her lips were millimeters from his face now.

He shook his head this time, no longer able to find any words. She smiled at the reaction she was getting from him and then suddenly, she stepped away. "No?" she asked innocently, looking him up and down, knowingly. "Oh well then."

Logan took a deep breath, stepping back into his room a few inches. He tried to steady his erratic heart rate and waited for a moment until the blood started flowing back to his brain from its currently location in other parts of his anatomy. When he could finally think straight again, he spoke.

"So that's how it's going to be now?" he asked angrily. "You're going to use your newly discovered powers of sexual persuasion to get what you want? You're better than that Rory."

"I was just trying to prove a point," she shrugged.

"And what point would that be?"

"That you let what happened last night get to you."

"_I_ let it get to _me?_ Are you serious Rory? At least I'm not the one who's suddenly dressing like a slut and throwing myself at the first hot guy who looks my way." He regretted the words before they even finished coming out of his mouth but before he had a chance to apologize he found himself looking at the cold, white door.

"Rory! I'm sorry, Rory…I didn't mean it, I swear…Ace! Open up." He pounded at the door furiously, pleading with her. He continued to knock for what felt like hours but was really only more like five minutes, until his hand couldn't take it anymore. He slid down until he was sitting on the floor in front of the door and let his head fall back against it in defeat. He felt the tears welling up in his eyes. Sometimes, even grown men needed to cry, and for Logan Huntzberger, this was one of those times.

* * *

**coughreviewcough**


	12. The Beginning of a Beautiful Friendship

**AN: OK, so I'm soo sooo sorry for the long wait. Vet school's a bitch. I seriously worked 85 hours this week. Last Sunday was my birthday and I still had to work 10 hours. so unfortunatley, I can't promise that the next update will be sooner. I hope it will but all I can say is that I write when I can and I'll try and get this stuff out to you as soon as possible. **

**I hope you enjoy the chapter :)**

* * *

_"What time was Finn supposed to get here?" Colin asked as he and Logan walked along the beach in front of the Huntzberger summer home. It was a beautiful June day on Martha's Vineyard; the sky was bright blue, scattered with white fluffy clouds. People dotted the beachfront—basking in the sun, playing in the waves, generally enjoying their time. Colin and Logan were headed off to meet their friend Finn who vacationed at the Vineyard with his family every summer…or winter as the case was for Finn, he lived in Australia the rest of the year. He was scheduled to arrive on the island that day. The boys hadn't seen him all year._

_Before Logan could speak, a tall, gangly, tan boy went running by at warp speed, ducking behind him. "Hide me, mate," came the new-comer's reply._

_Logan just looked at Colin. "Does that answer your question?"_

_"Why do I even ask these things?" Turning around, Colin rolled his eyes at the green eyed boy behind Logan. "Who are we hiding you from, Finn?"_

_"Hey come back here!" a girl huffed as she came jogging up the beach towards them, completely out of breath._

_"Good job, Finn," Logan congratulated, eyeing the brunette girl, dressed in a one piece bathing suit with a little skirt, her hair up in pig-tails. "A little young, but nothing we can't work with."_

_"Give me back my book, you…you…miscreant," the girl screamed._

_"Feisty," Logan smirked at his friends, before turning back to check out the new girl some more._

_Colin just rolled his eyes. He sometimes didn't understand his friends; as far as he was concerned, the only girl worth talking to was Steph and she was really more like one of the guys. He wished she didn't have to go to Europe for the summer; things were never as much fun without her._

_The girl stomped up directly in front of the group of boys._

_"I'm sorry about my friend," Logan said smoothly. "He just needs to learn that stealing is not an appropriate form of flirting."_

_"Flirting?" she asked incredulously. "He stole my book!"_

_"Yes, and got you to chase after him…" Logan pointed out._

_"What? That makes no sense."_

_"Of course it doesn't….but that's not the point."_

_"Ugh, what ever, just give me back my book."_

_"Finn, hand the book over," Logan commanded._

_Finn reluctantly gave Logan the book. The girl held her hand out impatiently, tapping her foot disapprovingly and waiting to have her property returned._

_"Little Women, not a bad choice," Logan commented, looking at the cover of the book he held._

_The girl huffed and reached out to grab for it but Logan quickly pulled the book away and held it over her head._

_"Now, now, what's the rush?" he asked, teasingly._

_"Amy's drowning!" she huffed. Didn't this boy realize how important it was for her to find out what happens next?_

_"Don't worry; Laurie saves her," he replied._

_"Oh my god, I can't believe you just told me that. What is wrong with you? I might as well just watch the movie and let my brain atrophy to the size of a pine nut if you're just going to tell me what happens."_

_"Don't you worry your pretty little head about it. There's plenty more in store for the March sisters and you can read all about it later," Logan assured her._

_She raised her eyebrows at him. "Later?"_

_"Yes, after you've hung out with us."_

_The girl immediately bowled over in laughter. After a few moments she looked up into Logan's straight face. "Oh, you were serious?"_

_"What? You think Beth and Meg are better company?" he smirked._

_"Better company than the thieving strangers? Yes."_

_"Well then, I'm Logan Huntzberger—Finn Morgan," he pointed at Finn. "And Colin McRae," he introduced them all. "Now we're not strangers."_

_"You're still thieves," she pointed out._

_"Well actually, Finn here is the thief if you want to get technical," he argued. The girl's eyes grew icy blue and he could practically see the steam coming out of her ears. She was getting seriously riled up and Logan couldn't help but find it amusing. He could argue with this girl all day._

_"But you're the one that has it and won't give it back, that makes you just as much of a thief."_

_"I promised to give it back once you hung out with us. If I only have it temporarily, then it's not stealing, it's borrowing." He could see the red rising in her face like on the cartoons. He suppressed a chuckle._

_"Yes, but I am not hanging out with you, and you said you'd only give it back after I hung out with you. Since I will never be hanging out with you, then I'll never get my book back and that makes it stealing." Logan had to hand it to this girl; she could really hold her own in an argument. It was refreshing._

_"Logan, just give the girl her stupid book. We've got more important things to do…things involving the Stateman's 'precious' rose garden," Colin reminded him. Ah yes, the rose garden. They had been waiting for Finn to arrive at the Vineyard before pulling off this stunt. He was the only one brave enough—or stupid enough, depending on your point of view, to stave off the vicious attack poodles. Never had such tiny creatures instilled such fear._

_Logan looked at the brunette girl—he'd be there all summer; plenty of time to ruffle her feathers…and learn her name. "Alright, boys," he said, handing the book back. "Let's get this show on the road._

_

* * *

"Hello, loves. You're looking exceptionally lovely this fine day," Finn exclaimed, falling down at the feet of a group of older, sunbathing blondes._

_Logan shook his head. "Finn, stop drooling at my sister's feet." He turned his attention to one of the girls. "Alexandra, pleasure to see you again," he smiled broadly._

_"Ugh, Logan. Seriously, stop hitting on my friends. Go away, and take the annoying Australian one with you." One of the girls said._

_"It's OK, Honor, I think they're cute. They actually think their pasty, pre-pubescent asses can get with us," another girl, Walker, commented._

_"You know you want me, love." Finn struck a pose to emphasize his point._

_All three girls began laughing hysterically._

_"Come on guys," Colin said with annoyance. He hated it when his friends wasted time flirting. Flirting was stupid, if Steph was there, she would agree._

_"Fine," Logan agreed. "We'll just leave the girls alone; give them a chance to miss us." The three boys walked off down the beach._

_"You better stay away for a really long time if you ever want that to happen," Honor called after them._

_The guys wandered down the beach back towards the Huntzberger house. They had some boogie boards and other beach stuff back there and the waves were looking pretty good._

_"Hey! Give it back!" Logan heard a slightly familiar voice yell. He looked around, trying to place it. When his sites landed on her he had to chuckle. Three boys were apparently playing "monkey in the middle" with her and her book. She just couldn't hold on to that thing._

_"Come on guys," he said, steering his friends in the direction of the mystery girl from the previous day._

_"Where are we going?" Colin asked. Logan didn't answer; he just continued to walk towards the group surrounding the girl._

_"I think the girl asked for her book back," Logan said in the most menacing voice he could muster._

_A tall, skinny, blond boy caught the book as it went sailing through the air and stopped to turn to the group that had just approached._

_"What's it to you, Huntzberger?"_

_"I can handle this myself," the girl said agitatedly_

_"Hey, I'm just trying to help."_

_"Sure, now you want to help? Excuse me if I'm skeptical."_

_"Well it's just that I know how much that book means to you now. I wouldn't want you to miss out on any of Jo's adventures," Logan smirked at the girl._

_"I finished Little Women," the blue-eyed girl responded tersely. "This is Animal Farm."_

_She'd seriously finished that entire book in one day? She had only been at the beginning of the novel when they had seen her the previous afternoon. That was pretty impressive, he had to admit. And Orwell was an awfully ambitious choice for a girl who couldn't have been more than 10. Of course, he read Animal Farm when he was 9 so… "'All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others,'" was his reply._

_"What are you? Walking Cliff's notes? Get a hobby."_

_"I don't have time for a hobby if I have to keep saving you from the book thieves like Finn and Dugrey." Logan pointed at the blond boy holding her book._

_"I already told you, I don't need saving. I can get the book back on my own," she said haughtily._

_"Sure, if Tristan doesn't make Duncan and Bowman eat it page by page first," Logan responded, pointing to the two others boys who had been tossing her book around. They were clearly the other boy's "lackeys."_

_The tall one, named Tristan smirked evilly and shot the other two a look which Logan caught on to._

_"Don't even think about it," Logan warned them. "Orwell is food for thought, not food for your fat asses," he glared at Duncan and Bowman. "Now give the girl back her book."_

_"I don't think I will. The little dweeb gets what she deserves."_

_This time Colin spoke up. Sure, he didn't really like girls but he suddenly felt the need to defend this one. He could tell that behind her resilient façade, these guys were getting to her. "Why? Because she doesn't bow down at the feet of the almighty Dugrey? She didn't beg to be your friend and bask in your glory? Not every one is stupid enough to think you're someone important."_

_"My grandfather owns the biggest PR firm in Connecticut," Tristan replied cockily._

_"Second biggest…" the girl replied out of nowhere. "Hayden and Associates is number one." All six boys turned to stare at her. Was the mystery girl someone important after all?_

_"Do you know Straub Hayden?" Tristan asked fearfully. Even at their young age it had been instilled in them to never insult members of families more powerful than theirs. It was the rules of Hartford society. One social faux pas could mean ruin for their family's social status. If word got back to the parental units that Tristan had been harassing a Hayden, he'd be shipped off to military school for sure._

_"Well, since I'm currently staying in his house and I share a quarter of his DNA and his last name, I'd say—yes, I know him." The Hayden girl rolled her eyes. She didn't think her last name mattered much but she had seen plenty of people who thought it did._

_Shit! Tristan thought to himself. Now he had to play nice if he didn't want to spend his pre-teen and teenage years waking up a 4AM and starting the day off with fifty one-armed push-ups._

_Logan smirked as he watched the color drain from Tristan's face. He had never been one of Dugrey's biggest fans. As far as Logan was concerned he was just an annoying, little kid trying to act all tough._

_Tristan's immediately sealed his face over and put on a smile. "Well, you know we were just kidding with you, right? We wouldn't dream of harming your book." Tristan held the book out to her. "See, all in one piece, good as new." He smirked as charmingly as he could but it was so obviously fake. The Hayden girl just took the book, pivoted on her heel, and walked away._

_Tristan stood there looking shell shocked. He was clearly used to being able to weasel his way out of trouble and he was amazed that he had not been able to do so with this girl._

_Logan laughed at the site. He loved seeing that kid put in his place. "Come on, guys," Logan urged Colin and Finn after a moment. He turned and chased after the girl._

_"Hey! Wait up!" he called after her. "Hayden, wait."_

_She stopped abruptly and turned around angrily. "I have a first name, you know." She didn't want to be "Hayden" she didn't want to be judged by how much money her family had._

_"Which you have yet to tell us," Logan pointed out._

_"You haven't asked."_

_"We introduced ourselves, it's kind of implied after that."_

_She rolled her eyes. "Rory," she said shortly, before turning to walk away again._

_"Rory?" Logan asked, following after her. Colin and Finn were tagging along._

_"My name," she replied without stopping to look at him. "Well actually, it's Lorelai, but that's also my Mom's name so I go by Rory."_

_"Rory," he repeated to himself, continuing to follow her._

_"Is there a reason you're still here?" she asked after a few moments._

_"Well, we figured since we helped you out with Dugrey and his cronies that you'd reconsider your position on hanging out with us."_

_"I told you I didn't need your help."_

_"I never said you did. But just because you don't need it doesn't mean you shouldn't accept it."_

_"Fine," she sighed. "Thank you, is that what you wanted?"_

_"I want you to hang out with us; I thought I made that clear."_

_"Why?" she stopped and turned to them. She honestly wasn't sure why they wanted to spend time with her. She was just some geeky, little bookworm from Stars Hollow. For a moment she wondered if it had to do with the fact that they knew she was a Hayden now, but then she remembered that they wanted to hang out with her yesterday, before they knew who she was._

_"Why not?" Finn responded with a shrug. With Stephanie gone the group was feeling a little bare anyhow, they could use a fourth._

_"Because you're annoying…bordering on stalkerish."_

_"We're not stalkerish," Finn gasped dramatically. "We're simply, overly enthused."_

_"And you get major points for making Dugrey speechless. I hate that kid. If you can do that to him I'd like to keep you around to sic all the people who annoy the crap out of me."_

_"Well, as long as your reasons are sincere…" she responded, beginning to walk away again, but a small smile pulled at her lips. Truthfully, she knew they would follow her and she was glad. She was never a particularly social girl, her only real friend other than her mother, being Lane. Deep down, she thought it might be nice to hang out with them after all. The characters in her books were great, but even they couldn't keep her from being lonely sometimes._

_"If you're a Hayden how come we've never met you before?" Logan asked as the boys trotted alongside her._

_"Yeah," Colin added. "The Hayden's are here every summer too."_

_Rory stopped, once again to face the boys. "I usually spend the summer in Cape Cod with my other grandparents but they decided to go to Europe this year._

_"Do you live in Boston like the Straub and Francine do? We never see you around Hartford." Logan asked._

_"No, I live in Stars Hollow. It's where my Mom works."_

_"A working girl, that's what I call my kind of woman," Finn replied with a wink. Everyone just rolled their eyes at him._

_"Your mother works?" Colin asked incredulously. In society it wasn't considered proper for a woman to work._

_"Is there something wrong with that? I plan on working someday too. I'm going to be a foreign correspondent and travel the world reporting the news like Christiane Amanpour."_

_Suddenly Logan put it all together. Her other grandparents were the Gilmores. "You're Richard and Emily's granddaughter."_

_Rory looked at him strangely. "Yeah, how did you know that?"_

_"They're always talking about you to my Dad. Apparently you're already quite the reporter…an ace reporter. They were showing him some stuff you wrote."_

_Rory blushed furiously. "Mitchum Huntzberger's seen my writing?" she asked._

_"Yeah, and I better not introduce you to him or he might adopt you and send me to an orphanage. I think he said something about knowing writers twice your age with half your talent."_

_Rory's face turned even redder. "He did not say that," she protested._

_"I'm pretty sure he did, Ace."_

_"Ace?"_

_"Yeah, I told you, Ace reporter."_

_"Oh," she tried not to let her smile show through. "You think your Dad would like, give me some pointers or something—no special favors," she clarified, "just some advice."_

_"I already told ya, Ace. I can't introduce you guys. Too risky, I could lose my inheritance," he winked at her. This time she couldn't help it, she smiled despite herself. Logan knew that, as Humphrey Bogart would have said, it was the beginning of a beautiful friendship._

* * *

Logan woke up in a strange position; his head lulled to the side, his legs splayed out uncomfortably in front of him, his back up against something hard. He tried to lift his head but the muscles in his neck spasmed painfully. He had apparently fallen asleep against the adjoining doors between his room and Rory's. He sunk back into the door again, willing himself to find the energy to try and move again. 

Things were really screwed up, but they would get better; they _had_ to get better. If there was one thing his dream meant, it was that. He was amazed at how vivid the dream was; how well he could remember all the details of the first time they met almost a decade ago. After that day, the four of them had been inseparable, and when Steph came back, she had become just as attached to the newest member of their group. But of all of them, Logan and Rory were the closest. She just understood him in a way no one else did. She could practically read his mind and she always knew exactly what he was thinking and how he was feeling. The only other person who knew him so well was Honor, once she grew out of her "I hate my little brother" phase.

The point was, for ten years they had always been there for each other, without even having to ask. Logan knew there was a lot of groveling in his future, but they would eventually move passed what had happened the past two days, because as far as he was concerned, he and Rory were family and there was nothing that could come between that. She would realize it too.

Forty-five minutes later he had gotten his sorry ass off the floor, showered, dressed, and packed (but not before calling room service and having them send every flavor of coffee they had to Rory's room.) He called for a bellhop and made his way down to the lobby.

When he got off the elevator the first person he spotted was Stephanie. "Good luck," she whispered in his ear. "You're seriously going to need it."

He rolled his eyes and shot her a death glare as she walked away. He searched the lobby and his eyes finally landed on Rory. He took a few tentative steps towards he before she caught his gaze. She looked at him for a split moment and just as the corners of his mouth were about to turn up into a smile, her eyes narrowed angrily and she turned and walked off in the other direction.

He just stood there for a moment until he felt someone slap him on the back. "I'm really screwed, aren't I?" he asked.

"Let's see, in one weekend you've managed to fall madly in love with your best friend and make her hate your guts with a fiery passion," Colin responded.

Logan turned to give him a pointed stare.

Finn spoke next. "Yep mate, you're screwed."


	13. Did She Suddenly Turn Into a Leggy Blond

**AN- So I'm fully aware of the fact that I suck. I could give you the sad sob story on how hectic my life is and how my hard drive crashed but I know you really don't care so I'll just give you the next chapter instead. I hope it's better than the last one. I learned a very important lesson, I know nothing about how 10 year olds talk and act. Sorry about that, I 'll try to refrain from writing 10 year old flashbacks again. Enjoy the new chapter and please remember to leave a review.**

* * *

Logan dragged his bags through the common room and into his bedroom. He collapsed into his desk chair and let out a sigh. The past two hours had likely been two of the longest, tensest hours of his life—and that was saying a lot when you had Mitchum Huntzberger as a father.

If it hadn't been for the death glares he had received from both Colin and Finn every time he opened his mouth, Logan would have begun to think that had had been literally invisible and mute. It wasn't that his friends were taking sides; Logan knew that; they had just been put in an awkward position. They were all forced to ride in that limo together, and with Rory not talking to him, it was not only hard for the two of them, but for everyone else as well. Logan also knew that even though his friends weren't taking sides per se, they were still mad at him. Add on to that the fact that, the boys at least, thought of Rory as the innocent, vulnerable one, despite her actions the previous night; she was the youngest, traditionally the shyest, and had suffered the most heartbreak—one night of acting out wouldn't change her place in the group. All of this added up to Logan being the one ignored for the entire ride. Still, even though he understood, he still felt like crap, probably because he was so mad at himself.

Logan was brought out of his pity-fest by the ringing of his phone. He sighed and pulled it out of his pocket. Glancing at the caller ID, Logan's mood lifted slightly. He was glad to have friends that didn't put up with his shit and who weren't afraid to tell him what he needed to hear, but right now he was much happier to have an older sister who would tell him what he _wanted_ to hear. He'd had enough of listening to everyone tell him how badly he'd screwed up—he was well aware of the fact—right now he just wanted someone to tell him everything was going to be alright, and that was what Honor would do.

"Hey sis!" he greeted upon flipping his phone open.

"Hey, just calling to be sure you made it home and that I didn't have to drive to New York to bail you out of jail."

Logan would have laughed if it hadn't been for the truth. "Nope; Colin and Finn took care of that for you," he deadpanned.

"Well I'll have to remember to thank them for saving me the trip," Honor laughed, not realizing that Logan was serious.

"Well I'd say it was their pleasure but I'm pretty sure it wasn't, this time."

"Wait, are you serious?" Honor asked. She rolled her eyes in exasperation. She should have known that her brother couldn't spend a weekend in New York with the LDB and _not_ get arrested.

"Unfortunately."

"What was it this time Logan? Trespassing, pubic intoxication, solicitation?"

"Solicitation, Honor? Give me a little credit; you know I don't have to pay for my sex." A_lthough a hooker probably would have been a better bet_ he mentally added.

"Well then what?"

Logan took a deep breath before quickly muttering, "assault."

"Assault!" Honor practically screamed. Logan was known for getting in trouble but it was always just harmless fun; this was completely unlike him. "What the hell, Logan? What would even possess you to do something like that?"

"How much time do you have?" Logan asked dryly.

"For you, little brother, I have all the time in the world. But this better be one hell of a story or I'll drive over there and show you what assault feels like."

"You?" Logan asked with a tiny laugh.

"Oh, you think I can't take you anymore just because you're finally bigger than me?"

"You haven't been able to take me since I was 8."

"If you say so," Honor placated. "Now get on with your story. Your favorite big sister needs some new material for the book she's working on."

"You're writing a book?" Logan asked excitedly, temporarily distracted from the shambles of his own life. He was excited to learn that his sister wasn't going to let herself fall into the trophy wife trap, especially considering her new engagement. He liked Josh and knew his future brother-in-law would never dream of asking Honor to be anything less than whatever she wanted to be, but Logan also knew that the pressures from their own family could be enough to crush anybodies dreams.

"Yeah, well I inherited that famous Huntzberger writing ability but I have half a chromosome too many to do anything newspaper-y about it. Dad can stop me from writing for the papers but he can't stop me from writing."

"Good for you, Honor. You really _are_ a great writer; you're book is gonna be great, I just know it."

"Thanks, Logan. But enough about me, I'm still waiting on _your_ explanation, so spill."

"Do I have to?" Logan whined like a five year old.

"Yes," Honor stated bluntly.

Logan sighed. "Fine." There was silence on the line.

"Well?"

"I'm trying to figure out where to start," he defended, though really he was just procrastinating.

"Just a thought, but for starters, how about the beginning?"

"The beginning—well I guess that would be when…Rorykissedme," he rushed the last part.

"Yeah?" Honor replied, as though it were no big deal.

"Did you hear me? I said Rory _kissed_ me. Rory Hayden, remember her? Honorary member of the Huntzberger clan."

"It's not like it's never happened before, Logan."

"No, I'm not talking some platonic peck on the cheek Honor. I'm talking full on lip action."

Honor rolled her eyes, sure that her brother was over reacting. "I'm sure it was nothing Logan. You probably just misinterpreted. Was there tongue?" she asked.

"Not the first time," he answered. There was silence on the line. "Honor?" he said, just to make sure she was still there.

"There was more than one time?" she finally asked incredulously.

"Yes."

"And these subsequent times involved tongue."

"Yes."

"Well…umm…that changes things just a bit," she managed to reply.

"It gets worse," he warned.

"Worse?"

"Uh huh,"

"OK, go on," Honor told him, preparing herself for worse than her brother making out with his best friend. The thought was more than a little disturbing to her since Rory was practically part of the family, but at the same time she loved Rory and the fantasy like idea that someday Rory could be a _real_ part of the family was kind of exciting.

"Well, after that first kiss, she kind of…well…it's just that…she got hot," he finally blurted out.

Despite the fact that Honor was still thrown, she had to laugh at this. "'She got hot', Logan?"

"You know what I mean."

"Not really. I mean, did she suddenly turn into a leggy blonde or something?"

"Honor!" he rolled his eyes.

"Oh, you mean you finally _realized_ she was hot," Honor replied, pretending to be a little slow.

"Yes, fine, OK. I_ realized_ she was hot. Are you happy?"

"Yes. Now, to recap, your best friend kissed you and all of a sudden you found yourself wanting a piece of her ass. Is that correct?"

"Is it really necessary for you to say things like that? This is bad enough as is without the dirty comments from the peanut gallery."

"Hey you're the one with the naughty, naughty images in your head, I'm just articulating it…in vastly less detail, I might add." Logan didn't respond and Honor couldn't help but picture the scowl her brother was making at her over the phone. "Fine, fine, continue."

Logan took another deep breath before going on. "Well, these inappropriate thoughts, I figured they had to be a fluke, right? So I got drunk and I avoided her, hoping they would just go away."

"Oh, yeah, that sounds like a brilliant plan. The 'ignore it and it will go away' philosophy on life _always_ works."

"Why do I even bother telling you things?"

"Because I'm the only person in the family you can actually tolerate."

"Oh, right. So, as you so nicely deduced, drinking and avoidance did not solve my problem. It was like one big fucking cosmic joke, Honor. I was her sponsor so I could only avoid so much. And then in the cab…well let's just say I got distracted and we wound up at the Plaza instead of the Waldorf."

"Oy, Logan."

"So we had to get rooms there only there weren't any adjoining rooms so we had to get a suite. And all the while Rory was being…well…she was making things very difficult for me. We kissed again in the elevator and this time I kind of freaked out but she was being eerily calm. She said that is was just a kiss; that people did it all the time…then she kissed me again.

"Then you both passed out, woke up, realized it meant nothing a lived happily ever after?" Honor asked hopefully, after finally beginning to understand just where Logan was taking this story. A kiss followed by a sweet fairy tail ending between her brother and little Rory Hayden was fun to imagine but a drunken one night stand was not.

"Yes, Honor, that's exactly how it all played out," Logan responded sarcastically.

"This is bad, Logan."

"Gee, you really think so?"

Honor didn't bother to respond to Logan's sarcasm. "So how does this tie in to the fighting?"

Logan swallowed the lump in his throat. The hard part was over, right? "Well, when we woke up we both agreed that it didn't mean anything and that we wouldn't let it affect us."

"But you let it affect you anyway."

"No, _I_ didn't."

"Yeah, sure," Honor said, clearly not believing.

"Rory, on the other hand…when we went out last night, well she wasn't really her usual self."

"What makes you say that?"

"Well, just picture typical Rory at a club in New York and then try to imagine the exact opposite," he explained.

"It can't be that bad."

"Oh, it was. You should have seen what she was wearing, Honor. Although it was pretty hard to see considering there was so little of it. And she was practically throwing herself at random guys."

"Ahhh, I see," Honor remarked sagely, finally realizing where the assault charges came into play. "You got jealous."

"What? No! Why does everyone keep saying that? I wasn't jealous; I was just worried about her."

"She's not like other girls, Logan."

"Thank you, Captain Obvious," he remarked dryly.

Honor didn't let this deter her. "With other girls—you see, you like, you have, you move on. It didn't work that way this time. Having her didn't make you stop wanting her."

"I don't want her, not like that, Honor. I just…I miss her. I know it hasn't been very long but I do. And even if she ever forgives me for what I did, what I said, that girl at the club yesterday wasn't my best friend. What if all this changed her? I just want things back the way they were."

"It didn't change her, Logan. She's trying to be someone she's not because for some reason she wasn't happy with who she was. But deep down the Rory we all know and love is still there, she just needs people to show her how important that girl is to them."

Logan sighed. "Maybe you're right."

"I am," Honor said with certainty. "You two will work things out."

"Thanks, Honor,"

"You're welcome. Now I have to go but I expect full updates on the situation, OK?"

"Yeah. Bye Honor. I love you."

"Love you too, little brother."

* * *

"Up!" Logan heard an Australian accented voice order. His mattress began to shake and he opened his eyes to see Finn bouncing on the end of the bed. He glanced at the clock on his nightstand and saw that it was 7 o'clock. He had been asleep ever since he'd gotten off the phone with Honor almost four hours ago.

"So you're speaking to me now? Because you haven't said a word to me since we left New York," Logan reminded him bitterly.

"Well, what can I say? I am a kind and forgiving man. Not to mention exotic to boot."

"What do you want, Finn?"

"Colin and I have decided that we've given you enough time to be alone and wallow in self pity. We've come to take you to the Pub so that you can be with us and wallow in a bottle of fine scotch and perhaps a lovely lady or two."

"Alcohol and sex are what got me into this mess in the first place, Finn," Logan reminded his friend.

"Get dressed, we're leaving in 15 minutes," was all Finn said as he walked out of Logan's room shutting the door behind him.

Several hours later the boys all sat around their usual booth at the Pub. "Maybe I should call her," Logan suddenly blurted out. Although they had been there for hours, all three boys had avoided talking about anything from the previous weekend. In fact, Colin and Finn had been trying to help their friend forget about everything that had happened, at least temporarily.

"Call who?" Finn asked in his drunken stupor.

"Ace." Logan looked at his watch. "It's only 10, she should still be up. She's probably catching up on all her homework."

"I don't think that's such a good idea, buddy," Colin told him.

"But I have to apologize again. She needs to know that I like her just the way she is…or I need her or…she's important. That's it. That's what Honor said. She needs to know she's important."

"You're not making a whole lot of sense, Logan. Which, by the way, is only one of several reasons you should not call her right now."

"But I don't care. I don't care what she wears or who she's with. She's my friend. My best friend…and I need her."

"And you guys will figure it out, Logan. But drunk dialing her is not the way to…" Colin trailed off as Logan stood up from the table. Colin looked around to see where his friend was going and his gaze made its way to the front entrance. He saw the door swinging shut behind none other than Rory Hayden herself. Colin sighed. "Sit down, Logan."

"I'll be right back," Logan responded, beginning to walk towards Rory. Colin got up to stop him but never got the chance. Something else stopped Logan instead. The door to the Pub opened again and the newest patron walked up beside Rory and slipped his arm around her waist. Rory smiled and leaned in to whisper something in his ear.

"So much for not caring who she's with," Fin remarked from his spot at the table.

"_Shit_," was Colin's only response. He stepped up to Logan and grabbed his arm, pulling him back to the booth before he could do anything stupid. "Leave it alone, Logan."

"Him!" Was all Logan could say. It came out as a growl.

"You don't care who she's with, remember, mate?" Finn reminded him. The truth was, Finn was fighting the urge to go over there and wind up with his own set of assault charges filed against him.

"She's doing this on purpose," Logan replied, not able to tear his eyes away from Rory and her date.

"I highly doubt that," Colin said reasonably.

"So you think it's coincidence that she chose to show up here with the one guy I hate the most? I don't care if he's your friend Colin."

"I wouldn't say Robert and I are friends, Logan. And I promise you, I don't like them together any more than you do but you've got to stay calm. If you want any chance of repairing your friendship with Rory…"

"I don't," Logan interrupted.

"Excuse me?" Colin looked at him incredulously.

"Not with that version of her anyhow. Honor was wrong—she has changed. The Rory I knew, would never go anywhere near that asshole."

"Logan…."

"I don't want to hear it, Colin." Logan stood up from the booth and disappeared from the Pub.

* * *

Rory sat on her bed, staring blankly at the pages of the textbook in front of her. She couldn't concentrate at all. It had been three weeks since they'd talked. Well almost, it was actually two weeks, six day and twenty one hours more precisely. She missed him all of the time but tonight for some reason, he was occupying her thoughts more than usual. Maybe she should call him. She'd considered it several times, but it wasn't her call to make. She wanted things to be right between them but until he apologized for the things he'd said to her, she just couldn't.

She had been mad at him, but she had expected him to grovel and beg for forgiveness and then she would forgive him and things would be OK again. But there had been no contact—not a call, not an e-mail, not a word. Rory knew why. Colin and Finn always avoided mentioning Logan when they were with her but Stephanie had spilled the beans. Logan had seen her with Robert. She probably should have known better than to go out with the one guy Logan truly hated, especially less than a day after their big fight and less than two days after, well…you know, but Robert had been so nice to her that morning in the hotel. He'd noticed that she was upset and he'd listened to her rant. Then he'd asked her if she wanted to go get some dinner when they got back to New Haven and after dinner they had made their way to the Pub. She hadn't even thought about Logan being there, and at the time, she honestly probably hadn't cared. She should have though. No matter how upset she was, she should have considered his feelings. She should have at least avoided his typical haunts so as not to rub it in his face.

On the other hand though, Logan had no say in who she went out with. It was her life and she was free to live it as she chose. So what if she went on more dates now? So what if she dressed a little more revealingly? Like he was one to talk? He had spent his entire life flitting from one girl to the next, each dressed in less than the previous one. What kind of double standard was that? The more she thought about it, the angrier she became. Screw him, he didn't deserve a call. So why did she miss him so much?

She was interrupted from her thoughts by a knock at the door. She sighed and looked at her clock; it was 11 o'clock, who could possibly be there that late? She got up off the bed and made her way through the common room to the door. Sliding the chain lock into place she undid the bolt lock and opened the door just enough to peak out.

She was just about to slam the door in her visitor's face but something stopped her. It was probably the glistening in his eyes and the tear streaks on his face. She closed the door slowly, removed the chain, and reopened the door wide, ushering him in.


	14. Like I Lost You

**AN: See how awsome I am with my super quick update? So in return for my awsomeness, I'm gonna ask you guys a favor. I want you all to make sure that there are no sharp, pointy objects or any rotten produce lying around that you might decided to fling if you're unhappy with this chapter. Oh, and you might want to make sure you have some Kleenex handy...just a friendly suggestion.**_

* * *

_

_She was interrupted from her thoughts by a knock at the door. She sighed and looked at her clock; it was 11 o'clock, who could possibly be there that late? She got up off the bed and made her way through the common room to the door. Sliding the chain lock into place she undid the bolt lock and opened the door just enough to peak out._

_She was just about to slam the door in her visitor's face but something stopped her. It was probably the glistening in his eyes and the tear streaks on his face. She closed the door slowly, removed the chain, and reopened the door wide, ushering him in._

"Umm…sit," Rory suggested, motioning towards the couch.

Logan looked wearily from the couch to the door of one of the bedrooms. "Paris?" he asked, referring to Rory's rather intimidating friend and roommate.

"She's at Doyle's for the night."

Logan nodded succinctly and sat down on the sofa.

"Do you want some water?" Rory asked. Logan just shrugged his shoulders, staring blankly in front of him.

Rory sighed and went to the mini fridge, pulling out two bottles of water. She made her way back to Logan and handed him one of the bottles, before taking a seat next to him. He took the water mechanically but then he set it on the table, unopened. She turned slightly and looked at him expectantly, waiting for him to speak. He said nothing. She held back a sigh, wondering if she should ask—she decided against it; he would tell her in his own time.

Meanwhile, the longer the silence stretched on, the more worried she became. He was just sitting there, staring blankly in front of him, an occasional tear slipping down his cheek. Each tear increased her worry exponentially; she could count on one hand the number of times in the ten years she had known him that he had cried…in fact, she had only seen him cry once before, when his grandmother had passed away.

She chewed on her lip as she stared at him, staring at the wall. She couldn't take it anymore, she set the last little bit of awkwardness between them aside and placed and hand reassuringly on his knee. "Logan?"

"I'm sorry, Rory."

"Hey, it's OK," she told him truthfully. Nothing that happened between them those past three weeks mattered at that moment. What ever was going on, it was clear to Rory that he needed her and that was the only thing that could possibly matter.

"I know I screwed up," he replied, finally looking at her. "I know I screwed up so badly but you have to forgive me, Rory. I can't lose you. I can't lose you like I…" he trailed off.

The suspense was killing her. She needed to know what had happened; she needed to know how that sentence of his was supposed to end, but instead of asking all she said was, "you didn't lose me, Logan. I'm right here. Whatever you need, I'm here."

Logan nodded in response. His tears were falling faster now. "She was mad at me, you know? For not talking to you."

Rory furrowed her brow at this comment. "Who?"

Logan either didn't hear her or didn't register what she had asked, he just kept talking, his gaze glazing over and shifting back to the wall in front of him "She never really said so but I know she was. Not like the others. Steph, the guys, they told me everyday what a stubborn idiot I was being, but not her. She loved you though, like the little sister she never had. Remember when she used to baby sit us when our parents had to go to some stupid party. You always got the extra dessert, whereas I was lucky to get dinner at all; she hated my guts back then." Logan smiled faintly at the memory but there was no smile on Rory's face. She felt empty, like her insides had just evaporated.

"Logan, what are you talking about?"

"Oh and remember when you had your coming out party and she helped you get ready? The boys and I were mocking you mercilessly and finally she just flipped and told us all off. She made us supply you with a month's worth of coffee as an apology."

"She's OK though? Right? She's going to be OK?" Rory asked, trying to contain the panic she felt building within her.

"And when we were finally old enough to combine subparties. There was something so exciting about it, like finally getting to sit at the grown up table. Her approval was the only one that ever really mattered."

"Logan!" Rory stated emphatically, unable to hold back any longer. She immediately regretted it. He needed her to stay calm, he needed her to be there for him; she couldn't start freaking out.

Logan just looked at her, and in the calmest voice he had used since arriving at her dorm, he spoke. "Honor and Josh were driving back from his parents in Boston. There was a drunk driver, he ran a red light. They say it was fast, for both of them."

Rory tried to hold it together as much as possible. This couldn't be happening, it couldn't be real. She felt her own tears streaming down her face now. "Oh my god, Logan. I'm so sorry." She gathered him up into a hug. They stayed that way, arms wrapped around one another, his head buried in the crook of her neck, her head resting on top of his as they both continued to cry.

"I lost her, Rory. I lost her just like I lost you. Only I can never get her back. So you and I, we have to be OK. We just have to because I can't lose you both. I can't even fathom…what am I going to do without her?" he blubbered into her shoulder.

"Shh," she said soothingly, rubbing circles on his back. "It's OK. I'm here. You didn't lose me. You never lost me. No matter how much either one of us screws up, you'll never lose me. We're best friends, we're family. Nothing you can do can change that."

There was silence again and Logan found the courage to say what he had to say next. He pulled back from Rory before speaking. "They want me to go identify the body."

"What? Logan what about your parents?" They couldn't possibly expect Logan to deal with something like that.

"Dad's away on business in Colorado. Mom went too, some famous spa or something."

"And it can't wait until they get back?"

"They want it done tonight."

Rory sighed. She couldn't believe Logan had to do this and all the other little things over the next few days while Mitchum was busying himself with talk of business and wills and Shira was drinking herself into a coma. Logan would have to deal with a lot over the next few days. She would be there to help him in any way she could. "Come on," she said standing up and holding her hand out to Logan. "I'll drive."

* * *

Logan let his head lull back against the passenger seat of Rory's car as she drove towards the hospital. The sounds of Breaking Benjamin filled the vehicle. Logan tilted his head to look at Rory. She stared straight at the road ahead, one hand on the steering wheel and the other resting on the car's console, intertwined with his. It felt good to feel her hand in his, to have her close by again. To feel just the tiniest bit of comfort when it felt like the entire universe was caving in on him. 

He didn't think twice about going to her when he heard the news; in fact, he was pretty sure he hadn't thought at all. He remembered answering the phone, the disembodied voice of the police officer delivering the life altering news and the next thing he remembered was the door to Rory's room opening wide. It was where he needed to be; he had to make sure they were OK, not only because he needed her to get through this, but because he needed her—period. It killed him to think that they hadn't spoken in three weeks. Three weeks of anger, three weeks of hurt, three weeks of stubbornness, three weeks of lost time. What if it had been her in that car? What if she had been the one taken from him and he'd never had a chance to make things right?

Any one of them could be taken at any time; all it took was a color blind drunk who didn't care about anyone but himself. There could be one on the road at that very moment. Logan grew instantly panicked. There could be one on the road at that very moment. Driving wasn't safe. There were a million maniacs with driver's licenses that could be anywhere. In an instant their entire lives could come crashing in around them. Rory could be next; he could lose her for real. She shouldn't have come; he should have done this on his own. He should have left her back at Yale where it was safe.

"Logan?" Rory asked, feeling his sudden death grip on her hand. She glance over to see the panicked look in his eyes, his fast, shallow breathing, and the cold sweat on his face. Was he having a panic attack? "Logan? Are you OK?" she asked, pulling the car over to the side of the road. "Logan look at me," she ordered, putting her hands to his face and turning his head towards her. "Take a deep breath, it's OK. Deep breath," she instructed.

He heard her words and tried to do as she said, slowly breathing in, then out. He felt his heart rate slow and sane, rational thought return to his head. People drove all over the place every day. What happened to Honor and Josh was an accident. He couldn't stop living his life, he couldn't stop Rory from living her life, just because he was afraid. This wasn't him. Logan Huntzberger wasn't afraid of something as stupid and mundane as driving. Besides, they were in the middle of nowhere in the middle of the night, what were they supposed to do? Get out and walk to the hospital?

He took one last deep breath and looked at her. "I'm OK," he said.

"You're sure?"

"Uh huh," he nodded his head. "I'm sorry, I just…I'm OK now."

"OK," she said hesitantly, gazing at him carefully, to see if he was telling the truth. He looked as OK as could be expected, given the circumstances. She pulled the car back onto the road and drove the rest of the way to the hospital.

* * *

"Here, why don't you sit down while I go find out what's going on," Rory suggested, leading Logan towards a row of seats lined up against the wall. 

"It's alright, I can…"

Rory cut him off. "I know you can, Logan, but you don't have to. Really, this is hard enough, just let me help."

"You're here."

"Of course."

He managed a small smile for her. "That's a big help."

She returned his smile, happy to know she was at least making a difference. "Sit, I'll be right back."

This time he obeyed, taking a seat as she walked off towards the desk.

"Hello?" Rory called, ringing the little bell on the desk. A few moments later a young woman in a white lab coat appeared.

"Can I help you?"

"Yes, we're here about Honor Huntzberger."

"And you are?"

"Rory Hayden." She pointed behind her. "That's her brother, Logan Huntzberger."

The woman nodded succinctly. "I can take the two of you back to the morgue. We'll need a positive identification on the body."

"Is there anyway I could take care of that? He's really pretty upset as you can imagine. They were very close. This is all just very hard on him."

"I'm sorry, I understand but the ID has to come from a relative. If he needs some time he's more than welcome to it, but it will have to be your boyfriend."

Rory sighed, glancing over her shoulder at Logan. Maybe she could use this false assumption to her benefit. "Fiancé."

"Excuse me?"

"He's my fiancé," she lied. "Honor was going to be my sister-in-law."

The woman looked from Rory to Logan and back to Rory.

"Where's your ring?"

"Rory glanced down at her bare hand. "Jewelers. Loose stone."

The attendant nodded. "Fine—come with me."

Rory followed her into the backroom where the walls were covered in cold metal drawers. The room itself was chilled but Rory was sure she would have shivered even if it hadn't been. The woman guided her to the back wall and pulled open one of the drawers, just enough to reveal the pale, distorted face of Rory's pseudo big sister. She swallowed hard, trying to force back the tears that were threatening to fall. Rory nodded. "It's her," she told the attendant. "Could I just…"

"Just a moment," the woman told her. "I'll be right outside."

"Thank you."

The woman nodded in reply and retreated from the room.

"Hey Honor, it's me. I just um…I wanted to let you know that I'll look after him. He told me that you were mad at him for not talking to me even though you wouldn't say it. You supported him, like you always do. Thank you for that. You don't have to be mad anymore, though, because we're OK now. And I promise you that no matter what, I'll always be there for him. You can count on me Honor, I'll make sure he's OK. And umm…before I go, I just wanted to let you know how grateful I am to have had you in my life. You were a great friend and the best big sister I never had. I'm gonna miss you." Rory kissed the tips of her fingers and placed them gently on Honor's forehead. "Goodbye, Honor." She pushed the metal drawer closed, and walked back out to the waiting room, politely thanking the attendant before making her way back to Logan.

"Let's go," she said, holding a hand out to him.

He looked at her curiously. "Don't they want me to…" he trailed off.

"I took care of it."

"They told me only family could."

"Well apparently 'almost sister-in-law' counts as family," she informed him.

"Huh?"

"I told her we were engaged."

"Oh," was all he said. He looked from Rory towards the back room he assumed was the morgue and back to Rory.

"Did you want to see her? I just assumed…"

Logan shook his head. "I don't want to remember her that way."

"OK then," she held her hand out to him again and this time he took it. "Let's get out of here."

* * *

They walked through the door of his dorm room at 2 AM, flipping on the lights. Rory looked around the place; it seemed that Colin and Finn were still out. She didn't want to leave Logan alone. "Do you want me to stay here tonight?" she asked. 

He remained silent for a moment. He knew that he should let her go; that she should get a good night's rest in her own bed, not worrying about him—but he just couldn't seem to tell her 'no.' He just wasn't ready to be apart from her. "That would be good."

"Alright," she said, as the walked into his bedroom. She made her way to the dressers. I'm just going to borrow some sweats to sleep in." She pulled a pair of Yale sweatpants and a Yale t-shirt out and walked back towards the door. "I'll be right back," she assured him.

Logan sat down on the edge of his bed, shrugging his leather jacket off his shoulders and tossing it onto a chair. He sighed frustratedly. This was ridiculous; she was two doors down in the bathroom changing her clothes and he couldn't shake the gut wrentching fear that something bad would happen to her; that he would lose her like he lost Honor and he'd be left all alone. Sure, he had his other friends, but Rory wasn't just a friend, she was his family, and she filled the roll far better than any of his real family…or at least any of the real family he had left.

Even so, he didn't understand the all encompassing fear that was plaguing his every thought. He didn't understand the need to have her constantly in his sight, to touch her as often as possible, to hear the sound of her voice so that he could know that she was real and that she was safe. It's not like he never worried before, or that he was never concerned about her safety, about the safety of the rest of his friends and family, but this emotion he was feeling right now was so intense it was almost paralyzing, and the only thing that numbed it, even the tiniest bit, was having her there. He could barely function, he wasn't himself. Would he ever feel normal again? Would he ever get over this? Would it ever stop hurting? Would his life ever be the same? He didn't know; all he knew now was that he really wished Rory would hurry up and get back from the bathroom.

A few minutes later Rory slipped back into his bedroom. "You're not changed yet," she commented.

"I'm just going to sleep in this."

"Are you sure? It doesn't look very comfortable."

"It'll be fine."

She sighed. "OK then. I'll just grab a blanket and pillow for the couch and…"

"Ace," she stopped and turned to face him. It was the first time he'd used her nickname all night.

"Yeah?"

"Stay in here tonight."

She looked into his eyes. He looked so lost, so broken. She'd never seen him like that before. "Yeah, of course." She put the blanket back on the shelf and walked over to the light switch, shutting the lights off. She made her way through the dark, back to him. She pulled the covers down so he could settle into the bed, then she climbed in after him. His arm snaked around her waist, pulling her close, and the both drifted off to a restless sleep.

* * *

**Yes, I am evil. please proceed to hit the pretty purple button and tell me just how much you hate me and how evil I am on a scale of 1- 1 billion.**


	15. Seeking Solace

**AN: thought it could be all evil and keep me from updating but I'm way too cool to let something like not being able to upload keep me from posting the next chapter for you guys. My sneakiness has prevailed and you may all rejoyce in the fact that I have finally updated ;)**

* * *

Rory could feel the soft, even breath on the back of her neck as she lay next to Logan. His arm was draped over her waist, his grip tight, even in sleep. She shifted slightly; he didn't move and his breathing didn't waver. She looked at the digital clock on the nightstand— 8:12, glowing brightly in red. She carefully lifted up on his arm, having to use more force than she was comfortable with to loosen his hold on her, and she slipped out of the bed. She paused to look at him and realized he was still asleep. She was glad; he needed some rest, he had barely done more than doze on and off all night—and she needed just a few minutes of her own to grieve the loss of the woman who had been such a huge influence on her growing up. Rory knew she needed to be strong for Logan, but right now she needed someone to be strong for her—she grabbed her purse off of Logan's desk and slipped out of the room.

She collapsed in a large, plush chair that sat facing the TV in the common room and pulled her phone out of her bag. "Call home," she commanded; the phone obeyed, automatically dialing her Stars Hollow phone number.

"A curse upon you, oh unholy caller," came the mumbled answer over the phone line.

"Mom," was Rory's weak reply.

Lorelai was instantly awake upon hearing the need in her daughter's voice. "Rory? Is everything OK? What's going on?" she asked frantically.

"I'm fine, I just…" Rory paused and Lorelai took the opportunity to continue her motherly rant.

"Are you OK? Are you hurt? Where are you?"

"I'm not hurt," Rory assured her mother. "I'm at Logan's."

"Oh thank god!" Lorelai breathed an automatic sigh of relief upon hearing Logan's name before remembering that she had barely heard her daughter even mumble said name in almost a month. "Wait, Logan?"

"Yeah."

"As in Logan Huntzberger?'

"Yes," Rory repeated.

"As in Logan—your best friend of ten years whom you suddenly stopped talking to or about?"

"That would be the one," Rory sighed.

"So do I get an explanation, or are you just going to leave me hanging here?" Lorelai asked, hoping for an explanation, not only for why Rory was at Logan's, but for why Rory had been avoiding Logan for so long. Lorelai had never bee kept out of the loop in her daughter's life the way she had been the past few weeks. It had taken all of her strength not to push her daughter to tell her what happened, but she could see how it tore Rory apart to think about how screwed up everything clearly was, so she tried her hardest not to pry.

" Logan showed up at my dorm last night and…" Rory struggled for the words. She'd spent her whole life studying words, learning the English language, how to communicate—yet in that moment the words were failing her. How did she say this out loud? How did she admit that someone she had considered and friend and virtual sister, was dead. She couldn't, the words wouldn't come. She choked back a sob. "I was going to send him away but there was something wrong. Really wrong."

"OK," Lorelai prodded.

"He kept talking about Honor and all these memories and…"

Lorelai inhaled deeply, waiting for her daughter to tell her anything but what she knew Rory was about to say.

"…and drunk drivers and…she's gone Mom."

Lorelai's heart broke into a million little pieces at that moment. It broke for Honor, and for Logan and of course Rory. Lorelai mostly only tolerated Mitchum and Shira but her heart broke for them more than anyone. She could never imagine the pain of losing a daughter…of losing Rory.

"Oh god, Rory, I'm so sorry. Are you OK? How's Logan taking this of all?"

"He's not doing so great. He's just really…broken."

"He'll get through this, hun. It's going to be hard and it's always going to hurt but he's got people who love him and can help him deal…he's got you."

"I know, and I'm going to be there for him, whatever he needs, but it's just…"

"What?"

"Well, I'm just not exactly sure where we stand ever since…" Rory paused. She knew it was time to come clean. She needed her mother now; she needed to be able to lean on her, and that meant confessing—getting all the pain and loneliness and confusion off her shoulders—in meant finally letting Lorelai in on everything that had happened those past few weeks.

"Ever since…" Lorelai prodded.

Rory shifted uncomfortably, finally bringing her legs up to tuck underneath herself. "I slept with him, Mom."

Lorelai's eyes narrowed in confussion. "Slept with who?"

"Slept with Logan," she rolled her eyes.

"As in footsy pajamas and movie marathons and passing out from too much sugar?" Lorelai asked hopefully, knowing full well that was not what her daughter meant.

"More as in no pajamas—or any clothes at all for that matter—LDB parties, and passing out from too much alcohol…and sex," she admitted somewhat shamefully.

"Oh honey," Lorelai soothed. "Why didn't you tell me about this?"

"I was ashamed," Rory dropped her head accordingly.

"Rory, no," Lorelai insisted, sitting herself up against the headboard. "We all do things we're not proud of, but don't ever feel like you can't tell me things. I know I didn't act so great after the whole Dean thing so I can understand where you'd feel that way but…"

"There's more," Rory interrupted her mother's rant, putting her out of her tongue twisted misery. She knew what Lorelai was trying to say—that no matter how much she messed up, she was her mother and she'd always be there for her.

"More, OK…umm, I can handle more," Lorelai responded, trying to be as supportive as she promised, despite her worry.

"I liked it…a lot," Rory bit down on her lip nervously.

"OK so he was good," Lorelai uncomfortably forced the words out of her mouth. "Good is good, I mean, especially in…OK I can't do this. I know I said you could talk to me about anything, but you're my daughter and I've known him since he was eleven. And sure, you've known him since he was eleven also, but you were ten then whereas I was twenty-six, making this much ookier for me. Can we please try to keep this as PG as humanly possible."

"I think that's a swell idea," Rory agreed, feeling just as uncomfortable hearing her mother talking about it as Lorelai felt actually talking about it. "What I was trying to get at was that when I was with him—I felt safe and loved and…happy. And I hadn't felt happy in so long, Mom."

"And you didn't want to let the feeling go."

"Well, no, but that annoying state of being, better known as sobriety had to bring sane rational thought back to my head and remind me that Logan was, well…Logan, and that being with him was just not an option."

"So you decided cutting him out of your life was a better option?" Lorelai asked, trying to understand exactly how things played out.

"No, we decided to basically pretend like it didn't happen."

Lorelai rolled her eyes at her daughter's naivety. Only Rory could think she could sleep with her best friend and then pretend it never happened. "And how'd that work out for you?"

"I just…" Rory began, tears starting to well up in her eyes. "I just didn't want it to end—that feeling, the being happy. I thought maybe if I couldn't have it with him…I thought maybe I could find it with someone else," Rory paused briefly before admitting the last part. "Anybody else."

It was a good thing they were on the phone because Lorelai visibly cringed at what her daughter was alluding to. The thought of her baby girl trying to find validation through a never ending cycle of boys tore her apart inside. Rory was supposed to be stronger than that; she was supposed to define her worth on her own terms—not to mention the scary pregnancy and STDs thing. "And did you? Find it?"

Rory sniffled back some tears. "No."

"No, you didn't try to find it, or no you tried to find it but you couldn't?"

"Both, I think. I tried to try—I guess. But I couldn't go through with it. I kept telling myself that I would get used to it and eventually I'd find what I was looking for, but I think I always knew that I was looking in the wrong places."

"Oh, hun. I understand what you were going through, I really do but you were sooo looking in the wrong places," Lorelai replied in relief. "I am a little disappointed that you thought that you could find some sort of validation that way, but in the end you didn't do it—you stayed true to who you are and I am so proud of you for that."

"Thanks, Mom," Rory could feel the hot, wet tears burning a path down her cheeks, she wiped them away and smiled softly—the best she could do considering the circumstances.

"You need to understand that those feelings you were describing that night you were with Logan, they weren't sex specific they were, well, Logan specific. How can you expect to feel safe when you're naked and vulnerable with someone you barely know? How can you expect to feel loved by being with a practical stranger? I'm not saying you need to be with Logan, you just need to let him back in. He loves you, kid, and you love him. Now it's up to the two of you to decide exactly what kind of love that is."

"It's friend love, Mom. That's it."

"Are you sure?"

"That's all it can be," Rory insisted stubbornly.

"OK, but I gotta tell you—I have friend love with Sookie and _we've_ never slept with each other."

"Mom!" Rory replied, shocked at her mother's seemingly cavalier attitude.

"Right, sorry. Inappropriate. It's just, you know me. I'm the kind of gal that laughs at a funeral. And that reference was probably a little too fitting to be appropriate at this particular moment in time and I'm going to stop talking now."

"It's OK. We just never really got to talk about everything that happened between us and I can't really bring it up now."

"All I can tell you is that if you're sure there's nothing more than friendship between the two of you, then you need to get passed what happened between you that night and all of the jealousy and anger and frustration that obviously happened as a result. And if there is more between you…you have to come to terms with that. Either way, right now there are bigger things going on and you just need to be there anyway you can."

"Thanks, Mom. I should go now."

"Alright, and tell Logan, if there's anything I can do to help…"

"I will. Bye Mom."

"Bye, kid."

Rory flipped her phone closed and slipped it back in her purse. She let out a deep sigh and let her head lull back against the chair.

"Ahem." Rory's head shot up at the noise.

"Colin!" she said in surprise as her gaze landed on him standing in the threshold between his doorway and the common room. She glanced quickly at the clock on the VCR. "What are you doing up so early?"

"What am I doing up so early?" he asked in disbelief. "That's seriously all you have to say for yourself?"

Rory just stared at him, not sure how to react to the vicious tone in his voice. "Shh! Keep your voice down," was all she could think to say.

"Oh, I'm sorry, if I'm interrupting your grand plan to sneak out while he's still asleep and crush his heart all over again, please don't let me stop you."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about the shell of a person my best friend has been ever since you decided to play 'eenie meenie miny mo' with your affections," he spat angrily.

"Are you serious?" she asked, not sure what the hell had come over Colin.

"What are you even doing here anyway? This doesn't exactly follow your new modus operandi…love 'em and leave 'em. Or did you already sleep with every guy at Yale—back for a second round?"

"I'm sorry, you're seriously going to lecture _me_ about sleeping around?" Rory asked incredulously, the volume of her own voice beginning to rise. "How many different girls do you think you bedded back in the day while I sat around consoling Steph?"

"Great, so now for that I have to know what it's like to see _him_ mooning over _you_…to have to carry his drunk ass home from the Pub every time he sees you out with a different guy? And Logan, what did he ever do to you to deserve this? Are you purposely trying to make him suffer? Because if so, kudos to you."

Rory shook her head in disbelief. "Well, after ten years of friendship it's good to finally know what you really think of me."

"I never used to, but you're not exactly the same Rory anymore. He knew—the moment he saw you out with Robert he knew you'd changed but I still saw the same innocent Rory. I guess I was wrong."

"You have no idea what you're talking about," she scoffed, standing up to face him eye to eye.

"I think I have a pretty good idea. You out with two or three different guys each week, while he's barely looked at another girl. The new clothes, the new attitude, the way you practically look right through him when you see him around."

"My dating habits are none of yours or anyone else's business, and I didn't look right through him—I was mad. I know you know the things he said to me. Pretty similar to the things you're saying to me right now as a matter of fact."

"Well I guess I'm just a little slower to catch on."

"Or maybe you're just a stubborn bastard."

"You can't do this Rory. You can't just lead him on like this. You can't disappear and then pop back up whenever you're looking for a good fuck. God, I was pissed at him when this first happened, but at least he cares. I always thought you were the kind of person who cared as well, but I guess I was wrong."

"How can you be saying these things? I care. My god, I care. You may know what Logan was going through these passed weeks but don't even pretend to know what I was going through because you have _no_ idea."

"**Stop**!" Rory and Colin both swung their heads around to see Logan standing behind them. "Just stop, both of you."

Colin opened his mouth to defend himself. "I'm not just going to stand by and watch her u…"

"Colin, I said stop. She's here because I asked her to be here. I'm sick and tired of fighting. We're going to be one big, fucking, happy family if it's the last thing I do because you guys are the closest thing I have to a real family left."

"What are you talking about, man?" Colin asked, looking at Logan appraisingly.

"Apologize, Colin. I don't care if you have to get down on your hands and knees and beg, just make it right."

Colin looked back and forth from Logan to Rory. "You two really didn't…"

"No!" Rory insisted.

A sheepish look crossed his features. "I'm sorry," he mumbled like a disgruntled toddler.

"It's fine," Rory replied unconvincingly. It wasn't fine. She knew Colin was only looking out for Logan but she was Colin's friend too and the things he had accused her of were incredibly hurtful.

"That was fucking pitiful," Logan shook his head in disgust.

"Will someone please explain to me what the hell is going on?"

"You want to know what's going on? I'll tell you what the hell is going on. Honor's dead, that's what the hell is going on." Logan's eyes widened in shock the moment the words left his mouth. Everything since he had heard the news had been surreal. He had been going through the motions, moving robotically through everything. In that moment, saying the words out loud…everything was suddenly real. He stumbled backwards a few steps and in an instant Rory was at his side.

Colin stood rooted to his spot—the words, in all their bluntness, echoing through his head. Honor was dead. Logan had needed someone and he'd gone to Rory. She had put all the anger and bad feelings between them aside, and she had been there for him, unconditionally. And he had attacked her, accused her of using Logan, of not caring. He had said horrible things to her; he had betrayed one of his best friends—two of them really.

"Oh god I…" he stuttered. "I'm sorry, I'm so…I'm sorry. I didn't know, I didn't…think. I…" He sat down, unsure what he could possibly say to even begin to make things right.

Rory sat Logan down on the sofa next to Colin. He was beginning to recover from his shock and he looked at Colin, then back at Rory pleadingly.

Rory turned to the stuttering boy next to her and she could see the complete and utter remorse in his eyes, as plain as day. What Logan had said earlier had been true…he needed all of his friends right now, he needed a support system. Fighting wasn't going to help any of them deal with this loss.

She squatted down in front of Colin so she could look him in the eye. "It's OK."

"No, Rory, what I said…I was angry and worried and…but I had no right. It was unforgivable."

"Hey, I think it's my job to decide if you're forgiven or not," she managed a small smile up at him.

He looked up at her. "She's really…?"

Rory nodded solemnly. "She's really." Rory stood up and sat down between him and Logan, placing her head on his shoulder and intertwining her hand with Logan's. "I wish to god she wasn't really, but she is."

The three friends continued to sit there in silence, just trying to seek a little bit of solace in each other's presence.


	16. You Can Never Go Home

**AN: Yay! Another chapter.** **Aren't you proud of me? I hope you like. Please leave a review and I'll love you forever. :)**

* * *

"Do I have to go in there?" Logan whined. 

Rory looked across the car at him and gave him a reassuring smile. "Yes."

"But I don't wannnna," he pouted.

She chuckled softly. "I know; but it won't be that bad. I promise."

Logan replied with a pointed glare, to which Rory nodded in understanding. "Fine, maybe it will be that bad but all the more reason to go in there and get it over with."

"I don't know if I can," he responded sincerely.

"Of course you can," she said, reaching over to take his hand and give it a squeeze. "This is your home."

"Not anymore," he sighed, looking at the mansion before him. He wasn't sure it had ever really been a home but it certainly wasn't anymore. There was nothing there for him now. "Now it's just a place I used to live."

"They're expecting us Logan. I know how hard this is for you but think how hard it must be for them. Your parents need you now."

"Because they were always there for me when I needed them?"

"Your parents love you, you know that," She assured him.

He looked at her like she was crazy. "No, my parents love _you_—the perfect child from the perfect family with the perfect grades and more front page bylines then anyone else on the Yale Daily News staff. My parents just see _me_ as the screw up who's going to run their precious media empire into the ground some day."

"That's not true. You're going to be great. You're an amazing writer and you're a great leader. Mitchum and Shira just want to see you apply yourself a bit more."

"You know what I love?" he asked her.

"What?"

"How incredibly naïve you are sometimes."

"Logan," she scolded but she couldn't help but smile.

"It's just…" he trailed of as he tried to explain himself. "Even when she hated me, she didn't really hate me—you know? She always had my back, especially around them. Every time I got lectured about what a failure I was—she stood up for me. We were allies. Us against them. I always hated coming home but I could bare it because I knew there was someone there who was on my side. What do I have now?"

"You have me. I'm going in there with you and I'm on your side. Colin, Finn and Steph are coming over a little later as well. You have a lot of people who love you, Logan. Losing Honor was…" she sucked in a deep breath, "…horrible and you have every right to be upset…to mourn. But don't think you're alone in this. You're not. You've got us."

He nodded his head and reached for the door. "Let's do this."

Rory turned off the car and got out after Logan. He walked around to her side and shut the door for her, putting his hand on the small of her back as they began the slow, painful walk to the door of the Huntzberger mansion.

"Have I thanked you yet?" he asked, half way up the marble walkway.

"For what?" she asked, furrowing her brow in confusion.

"For—all of this. For being here. I don't know what I would have done last night if you hadn't—"

Rory cut him off, stopping and pulling on his hand gently to get him to face her. "You don't have to thank me."

"Yes I do. I, umm, I said some horrible things to you—that night." He dropped his head to avoid her gaze. "I acted like an ass. You didn't have to forgive me, let alone—"

"Hey!" she said, bringing her hand to cup his cheek and raising his head to look at her again. "I've said it before and I'll say it again. I'll _always_ be there for you if you need me. Nothing that happens between us is more important than our friendship."

Logan saw the love and sincerity in her eyes. He swallowed the lump forming in his throat. "Nothing?" he whispered.

She shook her head slowly, her eyes remaining with his. "Nothing," she confirmed softly.

"That's umm…" he breathed in deeply. "That's good to know."

"Good," she nodded, taking her hand back and turning back towards the door. "Come on."

He stood there for a moment, before shaking his head and coming back to reality. This was sooo not the time for inappropriate thoughts. He couldn't keep having inappropriate thoughts about her. That wasn't her role in his life. He needed to keep things straight this time. The other way only led to madness and things he didn't want to think about—things he would never let happen again. He turned and followed her to the door where she was already ringing the bell.

The door was opened by a short, plump maid in her mid thirties. "Miss Hayden," she greeted. "Mr. Huntzberger, I'm so sorry for your loss," she said sincerely. She looked over her shoulder to see that no one else was near the foyer, before pulling Logan into a hug. "I'm so, so sorry, Logan," she whispered into his ear.

"Thanks, Mandy," he replied. Amanda had worked for the Huntzbergers for the past fifteen years and she was close to Logan as well as the other children, however, the elder Huntzbergers as well as the Gilmores and Haydens always scolded the kids for being too friendly with the help so they tried to maintain a professional demeanor when others were around.

"Rory," Amanda said, releasing Logan and pulling Rory in for a hug. "It's good to see you again...well, not good but—"

"I know what you mean," she assured the older woman.

"I can't believe this is happening," Amanda said, letting go of Rory. She pulled back and took a good look at the girl. "You're too skinny. Have you been eating enough?"

Rory chuckled a little and turned to Logan. "And you thought there was no one left here who cares."

"About me," Logan clarified. "_Every_one cares about you."

"Don't be such and idiot," Amanda replied, smacking him playfully upside the head. "You know you're my favorite."

"It's still nice to hear." He smirked.

"Come in, come in." Amanda ushered them in. "It's cold outside, you'll catch something." Once they were inside, the door was shut behind them and Amanda took their coats. "Your father locked himself in his office as soon as they got in this morning and your mother is in the bedroom sleeping off her last valium."

"Typical," Logan rolled his eyes. "What about Grandpa?"

"He went down to the paper to see to a few things."

He took a deep breath and nodded. "OK then," he said to Rory. "I guess we should go check in with Dad first."

"Are you going to be OK to do this?" she asked him.

"I don't really have a choice, do I?"

She put her hand to his shoulder and patted him gently. "That's my boy. Reluctantly agreeing to his responsibilities and promising to do the bare minimum."

He rolled his eyes playfully at her. "Yes, that's me in a nut shell. Now let's get this over with." His hand went back to the small of her back as he led her deeper into the house.

Amanda watched as they disappeared, a small smile on her face. What happened to Honor was devastating but at least she still had hope for those two. They were perfect for each other and some day soon she was sure they'd figure it out.

* * *

Logan knocked on the door and waited—nothing. He knocked again but there was still no answer. He had learned at an early age never to enter his father's study without permission but desperate times called for desperate measures. He turned the knob and slowly opened the door. 

"Dad?" he said softly. Mitchum sat at his desk, a half empty bottle of whiskey sat next to a half empty glass of whiskey. Mitchum picked the glass up and took a healthy sip before setting it back down, effectively ignoring his son.

"Mitchum?" Rory tried.

Mitchum finally looked up but remained silent.

"Dad, we're uh…we're here to help."

"Help?" Mitchum asked, finally focusing on his son. The empty look in his eyes had suddenly turned to one of anger. "_You_ want to help. And how exactly do you plan on doing that, son? You've never been any good at helping anyone but yourself," Mitchum sneered.

Logan stepped back a few steps. He had suffered through more than his share of Mitchum's terror but it never ceased to make him feel like a small, cowering child—and this time he hadn't even done anything wrong.

"And now you think you can offer your help? You can't help. Nothing you can do can help. You're useless—worthless. If I had to lose a—"

"Mitchum," Rory said again, cutting him off before the words could leave his mouth. There was no way she was going to let him say what he was about to say. She turned to look at Logan, meeting his eyes in an attempt to calm him before turning back and stepping forward into the room.

Mitchum changed almost instantaneously again. "Rory," he said amiably, as though he had just noticed her and he not been on the verge of telling his son he wished he were dead. "What are you doing here?"

"I came with Logan. I can only imagine what you must be going through right now. I want to help—with the preparations," she explained softly.

"Well that's very kind of you."

"We just wanted to let you know we're here. We're going to head back to the parlor and get started on some things."

"Very well," he mumbled, nodding his head and letting his gaze fall back to the glass of whiskey in front of him, clearly tuning them, and everything else, out again.

Rory backed slowly out of the room, grabbing Logan's hand and taking him with her. They closed the door to the study and Logan let himself fall back on the wall behind him. Rory turned to face him.

"Are you OK?" she asked, placing a hand on his arm.

"So, they love me, huh?" he asked sarcastically.

"Logan, you know he doesn't mean those things. He's distraught, he's—"

"Completely shit-faced?"

"Those things he said aren't true," she assured him.

"He says them an awful lot for something that isn't true."

"That's just the way he is. He doesn't know how to—"

"Rory," Logan said pointedly, cutting off her ramble. He didn't need to hear her defend his father. He didn't need reasons or excuses.

Rory looked him in the eye. "You're right," she said, collapsing against him and laying her head on his chest. "There's no excuse for what he said in there. No one should ever have to hear those kinds of things. And I can't really promise you that he didn't mean them but I can promise you that they're not true. You have so much worth, Logan. And I wouldn't trade you in for the world."

He smiled down at her wrapping his arms around her gently and burying his face in her hair. He breathed in the scent of her—sweet wild berry—and tried to push back to flood of memories that smell elicited—memories of that night. That night might have been the best of his life, but it was also probably the worst—until last night anyhow. He tightened his grip and just held her close to him. She was there now; that was all that mattered.

* * *

"OK, so we should probably start by making lists of everything that needs to get done," Rory suggested as they sat on a sofa in the parlor with a stack of fancy stationary sitting on the coffee table in front of them to organize things on. 

"Gee, you want to make a list; I'm shocked," Logan replied dryly.

"Well we need to get things organized and we don't know what's been done yet so we can't just start doing things," she argued.

"Umm, you saw my father a little while ago and Mandy confirmed that my mother has been in a drug induced coma all morning—nothing's been done," he assured her.

"Elias might have—"

"Grandpa cares about the business, nothing else," Logan said, cutting her off. He wouldn't have done anything really useful."

"I still think we need to get everything organized. There's a lot to do."

"Fine," he agreed with a sigh. He didn't really care how they did it, he just wanted to get through it, and truth be told—he wasn't really sure how he was even going to manage that. Everything was so overwhelming and he was just barely holding it together as it was.

"OK, well we should have a list for arrangements we need to make with the funeral parlor, and one for arrangements that need to be made with the lawyers, then there's outside parties like caterers—I'm sure Sookie would be more than willing to do it, and florists—maybe we should ask people to contribute to a charity in lieu of sending flowers, I think she'd like that," Rory started, getting into one of her ramble modes.

"Yeah, and I bet Dad and Grandpa would be thrilled, think of the publicity," Logan rolled his eyes.

"Hey, this isn't about them," Rory reminded him. You can't do things just to antagonize your father. We need to keep Honor's best interests at heart."

"Honor doesn't _have_ any best interests anymore, Rory. She's dead!" he replied angrily. He dropped his head to his hands. "Dead," he chocked out.

"I know—and it's not fair. She didn't deserve this, you don't deserve this, but that doesn't change the fact that it happened. The best we can do know is honor her memory the best we can," she told him, rubbing soothing circles on his back.

"Yeah, I know," he sighed. "It's just a lot to handle right now."

"I know. It's going to be hard—it is hard. We'll just take it one step at a time for now."

He nodded his head and looked at her. "Fine, let's start with the flowers and stuff."

About an hour later they had finally made it through two of the four lists they had planned. "OK, phone calls. I'm sure the news will get out but there are some people who should hear this directly from us. We'll start with family," Rory suggested for their next list.

Before they could go any further, Shira walked into the room. "Logan, dear! You're home. Rory, it's so good to see you, you haven't been around in ages."

Rory looked up at the blonde woman before her. Make up was caked thickly on her skin in an attempt to hide the dark circles under her eyes, her unwashed hair was pulled back tightly and she smelled strongly of smoke and vodka. "Hello, Shira. I'm so sorry," she said, standing up to greet the woman.

"Yes, yes. It's awful," Shira commented as though she were talking about the destruction of the rain forests and not the death of her eldest child and only daughter. "I'll have to cancel all those wedding plans now."

Rory turned to give Logan a quick look before turning back to Shira. "Yes, well, I'm here to help. Anything you need. We've already started going through what needs to be done for the funeral arrangements."

"Ugh, that's such distasteful business. We should let the men handle most of that."

"Yes, well like I said. Just let me know what you need and I'll do whatever I can," she assured Shira, trying to refrain from rolling her eyes at the woman in frustration.

"Well thank you dear. That's very kind of you," she turned her attention back to Logan. "I'm going to go check on your father. He's been locked in that study of his all morning doing god knows what."

"Yes, Mom," he replied, refraining from telling his mother just what his father had been up to a few hours earlier.

They watched as Shira retreated from the room before Rory turned back to the couch and quirked the corner of her mouth up at Logan in a look that let him know she felt for him.

"And that my friends, is a glimpse into the life of the high class dysfunctional family," he replied with a sigh as Rory flopped back down on the sofa next to him.

"Expensive liquor and fake smiles."

"You know, it's not like I didn't know they'd act this way, but it still amazes me. I don't get it. I don't understand how they can be like this."

"I know."

"I mean, she was talking like it was some stranger who'd died and not Honor."

"I know," she said again.

"I don't know if I can do this, Ace. It's just too much. I don't know if I can handle all of this," he told her. Tears welling up in his eyes. He didn't know how to be the strong one. He didn't know how to get things done—and it was looking more and more like he was going to be the one who had to get things done. "It's just too much."

"I know," she repeated. "I know," she said softly, pulling him to her. He lay down with his head in her lap. She rubbed his arm gently and soothingly with one hand and stroked his hair with her other. "We'll get through this. We'll get through it together," she promised softly, leaning down to press a kiss to the top of his head. "We'll get through it together.


	17. In Honor's Honor

**AN- I could blame it on my computer-lessness, but the truth is, I was having some serious writer's block issues before my comp took a trip to the little computer corner of the sky. I actually wrote this at work/school as I still don't have a functional computer. Hopefully it will arrive soon. Enjoy.**

* * *

"You can't be serious, Mitchum. The Post is a respectable paper, not some cheesy supermarket tabloid. We have better ways to use our time than to cater to the mindless drabbles of teenagers."

"The Post is a business, Phil; one which I intend to turn a profit on," Mitchum replied, swirling the whiskey around his glass. "Teenagers won't be teenagers forever and when they're thirty, I'd like them to know what a newspaper actually looks like. If they want to read about their cheesy horoscopes and the doctor that gave J-Lo her million dollar ass, then we'll put it in our damn paper, and maybe in ten years, we'll be lucky enough to still have a loyal reader base."

Phil shook his head at the man standing across from him. "I never imagined you as a sell out, Mitch."

"You came looking for me, Phil. You asked me to buy into your paper because you needed the financial backing. The Post is floundering and I'm here to save it. You need readers—and I'm telling you how to get them." Mitchum's eye caught someone walking by. "Logan, son," he called—the least that worthless boy could do was back him up on this.

Logan looked up at the sound of his voice and let out a quiet groan when he saw his father, standing with a man he'd never seen before, though Logan knew without a doubt it was one of Mitchum's business associates. He'd been trying to avoid his parents at all costs but he'd finally been caught. He idly considered the possibility of pretending he hadn't heard his Dad, but he knew it was pointless, and it was easier to just pander to his father—the last thing he wanted today was a scene.

He grabbed Rory's hand and led her toward the two men, not ready to face the beast alone. He was so grateful for her the past few days. She had been there for him through the whole thing, barely willing to leave his side long enough to shower or pee. He didn't even have to ask—she knew he needed her and she was there. Somewhere in the back of his mind he knew it seemed pathetic—a grown man who couldn't bare to be alone for five minutes—but he didn't have the energy to care. His whole world had crumbled when he'd heard about Honor, but among all the rubble of his former life, she was still standing there—and he knew that she was the one he could count on to help him put the pieces back together.

"Dad," Logan greeted as stoically as he could.

"Son, what's the first thing you read when you open your paper in the morning?" Mitchum asked, trying to prove his point.

Logan looked at his father, for a moment, biting his tongue to keep from making a sarcastic comment about the fact that he _didn't_ open the paper in the morning—in fact he avoided all things newspaper-y at all costs. He knew it wasn't appropriate—of course it was hardly appropriate to be discussing business at all, but again, he refrained from commenting. Instead, Logan took a split second to try and read his father even though he knew it was useless; Mitchum was always a mystery to his son. "Umm, the news?" Logan questioned, more than answered. By the burning glare Mitchum met him with, Logan knew it was not the answer he was looking for—anger was the only emotion he _could_ read off of the man.

Phil chuckled. "See Mitchum, from your very own son. Even the younger generation is still interested in _real_ news."

"He's got journalism in his blood, Phil. He hardly makes for a representative sample of today's youth." Mitchum tried to explain away his son's incorrect response.

"Well then what about his beautiful friend?" Phil asked, looking at Rory leeringly. Rory cringed at the look and unconsciously moved into Logan's side.

"Rory?" Mitchum asked incredulously. "You're talking about a girl who was completely star stuck when meeting Christiane Amanpour at the age of twelve, and _still_ managed to have a lively debate with her about America's two-party system and how exactly Ross Perot fit in."

"Ah, gorgeous and intelligent. She's quite the catch," Phil told Logan.

Logan put his arm around Rory's waist and pulled her even closer to him turning her into his side and away from Phil's skeevy, prying eyes. "Yes. Yes, she is," he said, glaring at the man.

A short silence befell the group for a moment, which Mitchum quickly remedied. "Actually Phil, if you don't mind there was something I needed to discuss with my son."

"Not at all, Mitch. Not at all," he agreed, not taking his eyes off of Rory.

Logan looked from his father, to his father's associate, and then to Rory but didn't move.

"Logan," Mitchum said pointedly.

Rory stepped away from Logan and gave him a nod. She knew he didn't want to leave her alone with the ogle-ly old guy and she certainly didn't want to leave him alone with his father, but it didn't seem like they had much of a choice.

Logan sighed and silently followed his father off towards the back of the house where Mitchum's office was. He glanced back at Rory one more time before disappearing around the corner.

"So, how about you let me buy you a drink?" Phil asked Rory, stepping closer to her and putting his hand on the small of her back. She shuddered.

"Drinks are free."

"You know what I mean," he said with a sly grin.

"As a matter of fact, I do, and the answer is no," she said, keeping her voice as even as she could.

"No?" he asked with raised eyebrows. "Well maybe later, then." As he said the last part he let his hand wander downwards to give her ass a squeeze.

Rory jumped and turned to him with fire in her eyes. "What the hell his wrong with you?" she growled, trying to keep her voice down so as not to make a scene. "I know you don't give a damn, but this is a funeral. Show a little bit of decency." By the time she looked up from her seething remarks she realized she was surrounded by three other people.

"Hey there mate. Name's Finn and this is my cobber Colin. We were wondering if we could have a word with you." The Aussie said, and he and Colin surrounded Phil, dragging him off away from the crowd in the main room.

"What are they doing?" Rory asked, turning to Stephanie.

"They're taking care of it."

"That's never good Steph, and you know it."

"Colin and Finn are good at making scenes, sure. But they also know how to be discreet when the situation calls for it. They would never disrespect Honor by causing trouble today." Rory just glared at Steph. "Come on; let's go get something to drink. I think you need it."

"I don't know, Steph," Rory replied, looking off down the hall where Logan and Mitchum had disappeared. "I should probably wait for Logan to get back."

"He's a big boy, Ror. He can handle his father all on his own."

"You didn't hear. You didn't hear what he said the last time," Rory replied sadly, thinking of the heartbreaking words that almost escaped Mitchum's lips in his drunken stupor.

"Rory, have you even had a decent night's sleep in your own bed since it happened?" Steph asked placing a comforting hand on her friend's shoulder. She knew Rory was right about Mitchum, and as worried as she was about Logan, right now she was concerned about Rory. "Have you taken so much as a half hour to yourself to forget this nightmare we're living in and lose yourself in one of your favorite books? Have you gorged yourself on a pint of Ben and Jerry's? Have you done anything at all for you?"

"This isn't about me Steph. He needs me. I wasn't there for him before, but I'm here for him now. He needs me," she whispered, the tears building up behind her eyes.

"Rory, I know you feel bad about everything that happened between you two, but it's in the past now. You've been an amazing friend to him through all of this. What happened before—you've been best friends for years, fights happen; it was an inevitability. You can't beat yourself up over it."

"He was hurting so badly and I didn't even know. It was all my fault and I didn't even know." The tears were brimming at the corners of her eyes now.

"You were hurting too, Ror. You made some bad choices trying to deal with that, but he could have been more supportive. You both made mistakes. I know you feel bad for hurting him, and I know you want to make his pain go away now, but you can't Rory. This is something he has to go through. Be a friend, be there for him, of course but this unnaturally clingy thing you two have got going on right now, it's not healthy—for either of you."

Rory looked at Stephanie, then back in the direction of Mitchum's office. "It's just for now. He needs someone. He shouldn't be alone."

"He's not alone. We're all here for him, but he needs to learn to depend on himself as well; and you…you need to take care of you."

"I will, I promise just…not right now. Right now I need to take care of him. I promised."

Stephanie looked at her curiously. "Promised? Promised who?"

Rory sighed, squeezing the tears back, determined not to let them fall. "Honor."

"Oh Rory," Steph said sympathetically, gathering her friend up in her arms. Rory finally lost the battle and the sobs came. She wept into Stephanie's chest.

"I promised her Steph. I promised she didn't have to worry; that I would take care of him. I have to Steph. I promised."

"It's alright, Ror," Steph soothed, hugging her friend tighter. "It's alright. She knows. She knows how much you care about him. She loves you hun. You won't let her down."

"I have to," she whimpered again as she surrendered to the sobs completely, and just let Steph hold her.

* * *

Rory stood by the bar. She had finally calmed down and Stephanie had convinced her to at least have a glass of wine to calm her nerves. Finn and Colin had rejoined them a few minutes later, but Logan was still no where to be seen. When he finally re-entered the room behind his father, twenty minutes after he had followed him away, Rory let out a deep breath.

"Hey guys," Logan said once he had made his way across the room. "Thanks for coming."

Finn looked at Logan like he was crazy—an interesting change of group dynamics. "Where else would we be, mate?"

"Are you OK?" Rory asked Logan.

He nodded his head very unconvincingly. "Yeah, it's fine."

"Logan," Rory said sternly, letting him know she didn't believe him.

"Well OK, it wasn't fine, but it wasn't exactly unexpected either."

"What did he say?" she asked stepping closer to him and placing her hand on his arm.

Logan just shrugged his shoulders. "The usual. You know—I'm a disappointment. There are important people here today and I shouldn't make him look bad, oh and apparently Honor would want me to grow up and act like a responsible adult."

"He didn't!" Steph looked at him flabbergasted.

"Of course he did. He's Mitchum Huntzberger."

"Yeah, but using his own daughter's death to try and manipulate you? That's low, even for him, man."

"Yeah, well apparently mourning is a waste of time, unless it brings a few deals with it, so he wants me to play the dutiful son and impress these fucking business men."

"Of course, it's important to impress Mr. Hand-sy." Finn muttered.

"Who?" Logan asked. Rory shot a dirty look Finn's way.

"No one."

"Rory!" It was Logan's turn to call _her_ on her lie.

"It was nothing, really. Your Dad's friend may have just gotten a _little_ touchy-feely after you left."

"What?" he roared.

"Logan, calm down. It was nothing, and Colin and Finn already took care of it—although they won't tell me how." Rory turned to glare at the two boys.

Logan also turned to look at his two friends. "Does this 'Mr. Handsy' still _have_ his hands?" Logan asked.

"Ask us no questions, we'll tell you no lies," Finn smirked.

Logan nodded, before turning his attention to the rest of the room. "Look at this," he shook his head in disgust. "If it weren't for the over abundance of black, you wouldn't even know this was a wake. None of these people give a damn about Honor."

Rory also turned her attention to the room at large. He was right, of course. No gathering in society was ever just to celebrate—or to mourn. Everything had an agenda—to increase the business holdings and/or social standing of the people involved. None of this had anything to do with Honor. "Maybe it's time for the sub-party," she suggested.

"I don't know, it doesn't seem right. Sub-parties are, well, parties. This isn't exactly a time for celebration."

"No, it's a time for honoring your sister, Logan. This…" Rory motioned to the room around her, "isn't what she would want."

"She's right, Logan. Let's honor Honor," Steph concurred.

Logan took a moment to consider it, before nodding his head in agreement. "Yeah, let's honor Honor."

* * *

The group had gathered the rest of their friends as well as Honor's friends and made their way over to the pool house. They were there for hours, drinking excessively and regaling each other with their favorite memories of Honor. The laughed and they cried and they drank toast after toast in Honor's honor.

It was late, and all but the core group had made their ways home. Logan and Rory were passed out on the couch, Logan's head resting on Rory's shoulder and her head resting on top of his.

"I'm glad they're not fighting anymore," Colin said, looking at the pair.

Stephanie nodded, not wanting to upset her boyfriend with what she was really thinking.

"It wasn't good when they were fighting."

"No, it wasn't." Steph did agree with that.

"But this isn't good either—is it?" Colin asked, motioning to the pair.

She let out a sigh of relief at the fact that she wasn't the only one who saw it. "No, no it's not. I tried to talk to her earlier—to convince her to take care of herself…"

"What did she say?"

"That she promised Honor she'd take care of him."

"Oi," Finn put in.

"So you think she's only doing this because of Honor?" Colin questioned.

"No. I mean, I do believe that she doesn't want to let Honor down, but she'd be like this even if it weren't for the promise. This…" Steph searched for the words. "Ever since the whole Dean thing she's been really insecure, and you know Rory, she tends to bottle things up inside."

"Yeah?" Colin asked, not understanding what this had to do with Rory and Logan.

"I know the way she has been acting lately hasn't been very...Rory like, but the truth is, it was just her way of trying to feel important—needed."

"That's ridiculous," Finn scoffed. "Of course she's important."

"_You_ know that and _I_ know that, but for some reason, right now, Rory doesn't know that. And now—"

"Logan needs her." Colin filled in the blanks.

"Yeah," Steph nodded. "What about him?" she asked, pointing at the blond in front of her and hoping the boys could afford her some insight into his side of things.

"Oh, well he's transferring," Finn said matter-of-factly.

Colin and Steph turned to stare at him.

"What?" Finn shrugged. "My shrink told me about it. She's _very_ hot."

"He's transferring?"

"Yeah. Rory's always been like a little sister to him and now that his real sister is…gone, he's trying to make her take his place," Finn explained.

"So you think he's being so clingy because…"

"He's trying to hold on to Honor," Finn confirmed.

"So you don't think he still has…un-siblingy feelings for her?" Steph asked.

"Oh, no—he's head over heels."

"Then I don't get it."

Finn shrugged his shoulders. "Either do I."

Stephanie gave him a disappointed look. "You're starting to sober up. Have another drink. We need insightful Finn back."

"Sorry, love. This Finn is all out of insight."

"So then, what do we do?" Colin asked.

"I don't know." Finn said. He turned to Stephanie who just shrugged her shoulders.

"Do you think they'll…again?" Colin asked.

"I don't know," Stephanie started, before cautiously adding, "Would it be so bad?"

The two boys turned to her and glared. "What part of the complex, and phsycologically fragile aspect of their relationship has you confused, love?"

"All of it, but I get what you mean. I just…maybe if they came to terms with how they really felt…"

"Because they first time they got horizontal it was a real break through?" Colin countered.

Stephanie sighed. They were right. Rory and Logan weren't anywhere near ready for that step. "I think we need to get them apart. I think maybe some distance will help them get some perspective."

"So take her somewhere—some girly thing and we'll have a poker night or something." Colin suggested.

Steph looked at her two slumbering friends again. "If I can convince her to. She's pretty adamant about not leaving his side."

"We'll work on him. Maybe he can convince her to take some time for herself. I think you're right; some space will do them good."

"Yeah," she nodded uncertainly. She didn't really have all the much faith in her plan, but they had to try something. The newest developments in Rory and Logan's relationship were anything but healthy. "They just need some space."

* * *

**AN: Everyone at work kept looking at me funny as they walked by but I stayed and I wrote just for you. I think as a reward, you should press the shiny button and leave me a nice little review :)**


	18. Shattered Glass

**AN: OK, so the end of this chapter might seem a little messed up, but heck--when are dreams ever _not_ messed up? So yeah, there's a lot of important stuff in this chapter. And for those of you who were unsure why the group wanted to "get them apart," I hope this clears it up.**

**Oh, and if you need a little refreshed on the timeline--Rory and Dean were together for about 3 months the second time, and the broke up about 2 1/2 months before this chapter.**

* * *

Rory threw her bags in Stephanie's Explorer and closed the hatch back. "All set?" Stephanie asked. It was 6 o'clock Friday afternoon, a few days after the wake and Rory and Stephanie were headed to Stars Hollow for the weekend. Stephanie had often joined Rory and her mother for classic Gilmore-Hayden movie nights growing up and she knew from experience that it was exactly the type of thing Rory needed to help lift her spirits and clear her head.

"Maybe we should just stop by Logan's dorm real quick to make sure he's OK and that he doesn't need anything before we leave," Rory replied, worrying her bottom lip. She didn't feel right leaving him yet—it was too soon, but when Stephanie had suggested a trip to Stars Hollow, Logan insisted that she should go and that he would be fine.

"He's fine, Rory. He's with Colin who I spoke to not more than twenty minutes ago; the guys will take care of him."

"Yeah, but the guys are well…guys. They're idea of taking care of him is getting him drunk and laid. That's not what he needs right now; he needs…"

"You?" Steph finished Rory's statement.

Rory gave Stephanie a sheepish look. "He just needs someone who understands him."

Steph sighed. "The boys understand him just fine, and they care about him just as much as you do. Maybe it _would_ do him good to get his mind off of everything."

Rory knew Steph was right…he'd be fine with Colin and Finn. They may not always seem like the most reliable people on the face of the Earth, but the truth was, she'd trust them with her life—and Logan's. But that didn't stop her from fighting Steph on this.

"I just don't understand why it's such a big deal. Why is it so important that I spend some time away from him. I spent weeks away from him while we were fighting and _you_ kept pushing us to make up. Now we've made up and you're trying to pull us apart."

"I'm not trying to 'pull you apart,' Rory. I'm so happy that you two aren't fighting anymore—but have you guys really dealt with any of your issues?"

"What issues?" Rory scoffed.

"What issues?" Stephanie repeated incredulously. "You can't be serious—being around you two is like sharing a room with Dumbo's portly sister. You try to pretend like nothing's changed but_ everything's_ changed."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Rory insisted.

"Ugh," Stephanie practically screamed. She quickly gathered her composure back up. "Rory, something obviously shifted between you two that night—or maybe it was a long time coming, and we just never saw it. But it happened and you guys trying to play it off like it's nothing just wound up blowing up in your faces. You two _still_ haven't dealt with any of that and I can't help but think that maybe you're hiding from your feelings in plain sight."

"You're crazy, you know that? Nothing 'shifted' between Logan and me," Rory air quoted the word 'shifted.' "We got drunk and we got caught up in a moment. That's it—end of story."

Steph sighed frustratedly. "Fine, just humor me, then. Just go to Stars Hollow, take a step away from this whole situation and see if that's really still what you feel."

"It will be," she insisted.

"Rory," Steph pleaded. She didn't want to fight. All she wanted was to help her friends. She knew the boys wanted to help too—but they wanted to help by making sure Rory and Logan didn't do anything 'stupid' again. Stephanie wasn't so convinced. She wasn't so sure that it would be such a bad idea for them to be together if their feelings really had changed—but they first needed to each take a step back and figure out what they wanted and then deal with it. The way they were now, that might never happen.

"My stuff is in the car, isn't it?" Rory replied in way of letting Steph know she'd given in.

"Alright then, let's go." The two girls climbed into the vehicle and headed for Stars Hollow.

* * *

"Logan!" Colin tried to get his friend's attention from across the table. "Logan!" he tried again. 

"Huh?" Logan's head shot up at the second, louder call of his name.

"You're up, buddy," Colin reminded him. Logan, Colin, Finn and Seth had gotten together for a poker game. There was also the hired dealer, and a few pretty girls scattered around the room, but Logan wasn't paying much attention to any of it.

"Oh, right." Logan looked down at the two cards sitting face down on the table. He knew he'd looked at them, but he couldn't for the life of him remember what they were. He took another peak—Ace, jack of hearts. Ace. "You think they made it to Stars Hollow alright?" he asked, looking up at the others. Maybe he shouldn't have told her to go. He needed her there. He knew it was selfish—she needed some time of her own, she needed to get back to her own life, she needed a good old fashioned Stars Hollow weekend and a traditional movie-night with Lorelai. The guys had made sure to remind him of that, and they were right, so he had told her to go—but right now he couldn't help but wish she was there.

Colin sighed, and rubbed his hands over his face in exasperation. "I spoke to Steph when they got to Rory's, two hours ago Logan. I told you that. They're fine."

"Right," he nodded his head succinctly then looked back down at the cards. "I fold," he pushed them to the pile in the center.

"Logan…" Colin said slowly. "You do realize you're the big blind, right?"

"So?"

Finn rolled his eyes—"No one raised, mate"

"Oh—" Logan glanced around the table, pulling his cards back to him. "Then I raise," he said monotonously, throwing an indeterminate amount of chips into the pot.

"You know you just went from wanting to fold to betting…" Seth surveyed the stack of chips in front of Logan. "…three times the pot?"

Logan looked at them pointedly. "Maybe I'm just trying to throw you off my game."

"What game? Game involves strategy. You have no strategy therefore you officially have no game."

Just then a girl came up behind Logan and placed a drink in front of him. She placed a hand on his shoulder and leaned in close. "I thought you could use this; you looked a little…parched."

"Umm, thanks," Logan replied dismissively.

"Anytime," she whispered into his ear, taking his ear lobe between her teeth and purring seductively. "I'm at your service." The girl stood up and walked away with a swagger as Logan sat there dumbfounded for a moment.

"She just bit my ear…" he said incredulously.

"See," Colin pointed out. "No game."

"She can bite my ear anytime," Finn piped in, glancing across the room to get another look at the girl.

"You act like there's something _wrong_ with me because I don't want some random girl biting my ear," Logan rolled his eyes.

"No, I act like there's something wrong with you because there _is_ something wrong with you."

"Yeah, well my sister just died," Logan bit back angrily. "So excuse me, but I think I get to be a little bit off without having you guys jump down my back."

Colin turned to the dealer, "Could you excuse us for a minute?" The dealer nodded silently and stood up from the table.

Finn also got up, and addressed the handful of girls circulating the room. "Sorry, ladies—we just need a few minutes alone with our mate Logan, here." He ushered the ladies out of the room and into the hall. "Call me," he whispered to a red head, handing her a card as she slipped through the door.

Once everyone had cleared the room except for Logan. Finn, Colin and Seth—Colin turned his attention back to his friend.

"No one's saying not to be upset, Logan; we'd be worried if you weren't," Colin assured him. "But there's more to it than that."

"And you've decided this based on the fact that I didn't want to jump the ear fetish girl?" Logan asked, hoping to show Colin how ridiculous he sounded.

"Sort of."

Logan looked at him dumbfounded.

"Do we need to remind about the last time you _did _have sex?" Finn asked.

Logan scoffed, knowing exactly what they were trying to get at. "This is about _Rory?_"

"How many times do you think you've asked about her since we started playing this game two hours ago?"

"I don't know, once or twice," he responded off-handidly.

Colin looked to the others. "Eight," Seth muttered.

"Eight," Colin repeated. "In two hours. That's once every fifteen minutes, Logan. Finn doesn't even mention a red head that often."

"I'm worried, is that so bad?"

"She's in Stars Hollow. It's like Mayberry there, only safer."

"Do you have a point, or are you just pissing me off for fun?" Logan asked snidely.

"She not Honor."

Logan rolled his eyes. "No shit, Sherlock."

"She can't take Honor's place."

"What are you talking about?"

"She's your best friend, you're pseudo little sister, your lover…"

"One stupid drunken night…" Logan protested.

"And you've never gotten over it," Finn reminded him.

"She can't be everything, Logan. You have to choose. What do you want her to mean to you?"

"Whatever, you guys are insane. I can't deal with this right now, I'm going to bed." Logan turned on his heal and stomped off towards his bedroom.

"It's 9 o'clock," Finn yelled. The sound of the slamming door was the only reply.

* * *

"How about When Harry Met Sally?" Steph asked, holding up the movie for Rory's approval. 

"Ooh, good choice—we could do a whole Meg Ryan night."

"One from each decade," Steph suggested.

"OK, so we have an 80's movie…when did Kate and Leopold come out?" Rory asked out loud as she scanned the racks looking for it. "Ah, here we go. She grabbed the movie and looked at the back. "2001. Perfect. Now we just need a 90's movie."

"You've Got Mail?"

"Eh, maybe…ooh wait, I've got it---City of Angels."

"Good choice," Stephanie agreed, taking the movies and surveying them one last time. "I think Lorelai will approve. Come one, let's check out. Stephanie moved out of the aisle but stopped short, turning around and pushing Rory up against the stack of movies, with her arm.

"What the...?" Rory began. She pushed Steph's arm away and was about to move around her when she saw someone walk passed the aisle they were in. She quickly plastered herself back up against the wall, trying to stay out of sight. "Oh God, I so can not deal with him right now."

"Shh," Steph advised.

"Hurry up," Rory heard the all too familiar voice of her ex-boyfriend whine.

"I'm coming, I'm coming," another familiar voice—this one female—declared. "You try walking that fast when _you're_ six months pregnant and _then_ you can complain."

Rory's eyes went wide as Lindsay finally caught up with Dean. There was no arguing that Rory had heard her wrong—Lindsay's stomach protruded none too subtly beneath her baby-doll blouse.

"Rory…" Steph ventured.

"She….He…They…" the brunette stuttered in a whisper, pointing manically at the couple. Steph shushed her again, Rory again and pushed her arm down to her side.

"Well, I'll tell you what—you pull a Danny DeVito and figure out how to make that happen and I promise to carry the next one," Dean smiled brightly at Lindsay, patting her stomach lovingly. "What do you think, little guy? Think she can figure out how to do it?"

"I don't know, baby girl," she spoke to her stomach but quickly looked up at Dean to stick her tongue out at the mention of _girl_, "Taking care of you won't leave much time for dabbling in the sciences."

He chuckled slightly, smiling widely at his wife. "I love you."

"I love you too," she smiled back.

"And I love you…" he squatted down so he was talking into her stomach. He placed a quick kiss on her belly before standing up. "Now let's go get that movie." The couple disappeared from view.

"Stay here," Steph told Rory. She went to the end of the aisle and stuck her head out, just in time to watch Dean and Lindsay disappear down an aisle across the way. "Come on." She pulled on Rory's hand. "Quick, go wait outside." She pushed Rory towards the exit. "I'll pay for these," she adde, holding up the movies, "and be right there."

Rory nodded her head mechanically and slipped out of the store.

_

* * *

_

_He was lying outside—the stars were shining brightly, crickets were chirping melodiously, a cool breeze wafted through the air. If it weren't for the mind numbing pain, it almost would have been peaceful. He closed his eyes and was met with the vision of a sudden flash of blinding light, accompanied by a quaking boom. He opened his eyes again and tried to move, but it hurt too much—and he was deathly afraid of what was beside him_

"_Logan," it was barely a whisper._

"_Honor?" he turned his head to the right, but there was nothing there but pavement, bordering grass, littered with shattered glass. He took a deep breath—ignoring the shooting pains through his torso, and turned his head to the left._

"_Honor!" he screamed at the sight of his sister's lifeless body lying a few feet away._

"_Logan," the whisper came again, but it wasn't from his sister. He forced himself to sit up—pausing only momentarily to shake off the dizziness that blackened his vision. He looked around—there was no one else there. He got to his knees and crawled to Honor's side. He reached out for her wrist and placed his fingers to it, desperately searching for a pulse—he found none._

"_Honor," he cried. "Oh god, Honor. Please, please don't leave." He threw himself on top of her, hugging her tightly to him, afraid to let go._

"_Logan." The voice was different this time—but he was certain he was still imagining it. It couldn't be real—she was dead._

"_Logan." It came again. "Logan it hurts."_

_He pulled back and looked at the woman in his arms. "It hurts so much, Logan…" she repeated. _

"_It's OK, Ace. It's going to be OK," he assured her. "But we have to find Honor. She was just here." He turned his head in every direction searching frantically for his sister. "She was just here. She was hurt, Ace. She was…she was…"_

"_Logan, Honor wasn't with us," she assured him._

"_She wasn't?" he asked desperately._

"_No, Logan. Honor…Honor is dead."_

_He let out a whimper._

_Rory sat up and looked at him. "You're hurt," she replied, softly running her fingers along his chest where the tear in his shirt revealed a gaping wound eerily close to where his heart should be._

_He looked down. "I'm fine," he shook his head. "It's you I'm worried about."_

"_Me, why are you worried about me?" she asked. He examined her more closely—she seemed fine. He turned his head, taking in his surroundings. They weren't on the street anymore. Where were they? It looked like...his bedroom._

"_Logan, is everything OK?"_

"_I…" He looked down—there was no more blood, no more pain. He was dressed in just his boxers and she had on a pair of pyjamas. "I…how did we get here?"_

"_I think you had a bad dream."_

"_Right, a dream," he nodded._

"_You've been way too stressed out lately. Lie down, just relax," she pushed him down to the bed and began rubbing soothing circle on his chest. He breathed deeply, melting into her touch. He closed his eyes and relaxed._

"_Good boy," he heard her say. The next thing he knew he felt her lips brush against his neck and his eyes popped back open to see her straddling him._

"_Rory, what are you doing?"_

"_Helping you relax," she purred, placing more kisses down his neck and over his chest._

_He sat there, immobilized, not sure how to respond, until she moved back up and kissed him on the lips. He kissed her back, his hands moving subconsciously to the hem of her tank top and yanking it over her head. _

_He flipped them over, moving his lips away from hers and trailing them down her body to the waist band of her pyjama pants. He fingered them cautiously for a moment before slowly sliding them down her legs. He moved half way back up her body and placed a soft, open mouthed kiss where her right hip bone jutted out, then one over her belly button. He moved further up his body, burying his head in her chest and caressing the supple swellings with his hands. He turned his head to the side and kissed the inside of one of her breasts, then turned his head in the other direction and kissed the other._

_His hands slid down her sides, over her lower abdomen to her thighs and he gently pried them apart, lifting his hips up simultaneously and then lowering himself down, sliding into her with ease. She felt amazing—warm, and tight and wet—and safe and loving and comfortable, like he could only imagine a real home to feel. He felt at home, at peace inside her and, god that was cheesy but it was his dream damnit, and that's how it was going to be. He thrust repeatedly, rhythmically and the pressure built until he exploded inside her. _

_His ears were ringing and he struggled to catch his breath, and it suddenly occurred to him that he wasn't out of breath from exertion, but rather from pain. He opened his eyes to the site of stars and he felt his heart still. He turned his head right and was met with the some how familiar site of pavement bordering grass, littered with shattered glass. He held his breath, turned his head to the left…and woke up._


	19. Second Star to the Right and Straight On

**AN: So this chapter is a little on the shorter side, but I like to think that what it lacks in length, it makes up for in content. I hope you like it, it was fun to write :) Don't forget to review, you know you want to :P**

* * *

Logan stared up at the big oak tree—it had been ages since he'd last scaled it. It looked like they had trimmed some of the branches—or maybe it was just him. He sighed, once again questioning his choice to be there, but really, he had no choice—he needed to see her. He placed one foot on the knot, a few feet off the ground and hoisted himself up, grabbing for the first branch. He pulled himself onto it and began skillfully climbing the rest of the tree—no longer thinking about it, just letting muscle memory take him to her window.

He reached the branch directly in line with her room and paused, staring through the window. It was his routine—he never went right in. He'd watch her sleep for a while, imagining the whole domestic scene—Chris tucking her in snuggly, Lorelai giving her a quick kiss on the forehead and wishing her sweet dreams; he imagined they must have read to her when she was younger—every fairy tale image he'd ever had of "home" was right there in that window.

But that's all it was to him—a fairy tale, especially now that Honor was gone. He didn't live in that world; he lived in a world far, far away—second star to the right and straight on 'till morning—kind of far away. See, that was the thing about Peter Pan—the thing that was so often over looked once Disney had their way with it—Neverland wasn't the fairly tale, Wendy's house was. Sure, Peter's life seemed exciting—fighting pirates and cohorting with Indians and running around with the Lost Boys making mischief and living by their own rules without anybody to answer to—but he kept going back to Wendy's night after night, watching her almost voyeuristically. As tempting as the freedom and irresponsibility of Neverland was; he secretly desired more—desired the safety, and home, and love that only she could offer.

He shook his head of the thoughts—desire wasn't enough. Peter didn't end up falling madly in love with Wendy and leaving Neverland behind. Neverland was a part of him—something he would never escape. She returned home, where she belonged, and he failed to step up to the plate—he left her with empty promises of his return and then disappeared for twenty years. He probably spent those two decades away diddling the mermaids, and the Indian princess and letting Tinker Bell tinker with _his_ bell. God, he was such a screw up.

And yet—he was going in anyway. He pushed open the glass and climbed in. Walking over to the bed, he kneeled beside it, reaching out and pushing a strand of hair behind her ear. "Ace," he whispered.

She stirred slightly. He tried again. "Ace." Her eyes fluttered open.

"Logan?"

"You know anyone else who climbs in your window in the middle of the night, purposely wakes you up, and calls you 'Ace?'"

She instinctively moved over in the bed and he shrugged off his jacket and climbed in without a word, lying on his side so they were face to face.

"What happened? Was it your Dad?" It was always his Dad, and on the few occasions it wasn't—it was his Mom.

He shrugged. "Just couldn't sleep."

"Why not?" she asked, lacing the fingers of her hand with his.

"Bad dream."

"Tell me about it?"

He paused for a moment before answering her. "The crash," he admitted. "I don't remember much." He remembered every detail in sensory overload. Even the unseen images kept plaguing him—he never saw who was next to him at the end of the dream but he knew it wasn't Honor that time—it was Rory, and he couldn't get the image of her bruised, and broken, and breathless body out of his head—and he knew it was his fault.

She just squeezed his hand, and remained silent—offering him comfort in ways she could never even know.

He finally spoke again. "Honor used to bring me here—before I could drive. It was always amazing that she was free nearly every time I needed her to be. It was like she knew."

Rory chuckled softly.

"What?"

"You always were so predictable."

He looked at her, brow furrowed. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"When Dad was living in Boston part time, finishing up law school, he was obsessed with locking the windows."

"Your window was never locked."

"It was never locked for _you_," she corrected.

"How…?"

"You would always last two days after you got home from school, two days after he got home from a meeting—forty-eight hours before you absolutely had to get out of that house."

"You knew when I was coming?"

She nodded her head.

"You knew before I even knew?" She really did know him better than he knew himself—it was amazing. And Honor knew too. She had to have known—and not only did she know; she planned around it. She planned her life around her brother's little freak outs. Not anymore—she wouldn't plan anything anymore.

"Mmm, tonight was a bit of a surprise."

"I'm sorry."

"Hey," she insisted softly, moving the arm she was lying on out from underneath her and softly brushing her fingers to his cheek. "You _never_ have to apologize for coming to me. It's what I'm here for. You would do the same for me."

He must have looked skeptical. It wasn't that he wouldn't go out of his way to try and be there for her in any way possible; it was just the succeeding part that had him a little concerned.

"You _would_," she insisted softly. "You have. Logan, you've been there for me a million different times in a million different ways. When I was in high school and I had to go to those Friday night dinner's because Dad was still in school and Mom was trying to get the Dragonfly off the ground and the grandparents were helping us—god those dinner's were awful. I love my family; you know that, but just not all at once like that. And you knew—you knew how stressed out they made me, and you always knew how to calm me down. Don't think I never noticed how quiet it was every time I called you after I got home. I'm not stupid enough to think you were sitting home and studying at 10:15 every Friday night."

"10:17—unless there was traffic."

He noticed a small smile take hold as she registered this. And then, she tilted her head up to meet his eyes dead on. He was suddenly aware of just how close they were lying. He shivered at the intensity of her gaze, but didn't dare look away. He felt her hand drop his and the next thing he knew, it was cupping his face, her thumb gently caressing his cheek. "See?" she whispered, closing the last few inches between them.

She pushed into his mouth which was open in shock. He did nothing, unable to move, as her tongue continued to explore. Her hand fell from his cheek and slid down over his chest. She pressed softly until he obeyed, turning onto his back. She followed, turning over with him so that she was on top. Her other hand made its way to his chest as well and together they pressed down and up, dragging his shirt with them as she continued her assault on his mouth. One hand continued to push his shirt up and the other moved to the newly uncovered skin of his abdomen, caressing it softly.

A part of him wanted to shift his weight just enough to allow her to tear the shirt off completely and toss it to the ground. A part of him wanted to flip them over and do the same to her shirt…then her pants…and his pants. A part of him wanted to lose himself inside her, to make love to her until his mind couldn't process anything else and all of the pain was just a faint memory. But another part of him was telling him to put a stop to this—that they had gone there before and only disaster had come of it. Right now, neither part was winning—so he did the only think his body would allow him to do—he spoke her name. "Rory."

She pulled away from his mouth and brought her lips down to his chest, just bellow the bunched up fabric of his t-shirt. "Shh," she whispered between open mouth kisses. "It's OK, just relax."

"_Rory, what are you doing?"_

"_Helping you relax." _

The dream that had been momentarily forgotten came flooding back—every touch, every whisper, the way he felt as he spilled into her—and then the stars and the pavement, and the glass, and the fear as he turned to look at the body lying next to him—it was her, he was sure of it. He would hurt her. He'd hurt her and he'd lose her. And finally, one part won out over the other.

"Rory, stop!" He pushed her off of him, sitting up and pulling his shirt back down.

She flipped over on her back with a sigh. "Logan."

"We can't do this, Rory. God, I think passed precedence has made that pretty damn clear. _This_," he said, motioning between the two of them, "is a very bad idea."

There was silence for a moment, neither knowing what to do next.

"Lindsay is pregnant," she blurted out.

He turned to look at her incredulously. "So _that's_ what this was about? Some sick attempt to get back at your cheating bastard of an ex?"

"Logan, NO!" she insisted, sitting up to look him in the eye. "I would never do that to you. You have to know by now that I would never do that to you," she pleaded.

Of course he knew that—god, what would possess him to accuse her of something like that? "I'm sorry," he whispered. "I know, I just…I'm sorry." He took her hand in his and gave it a squeeze.

There was another moment of silence, before Rory continued on—she obviously had a point to make.

"6 months."

He quickly did the math. "So, before you and he…"

She nodded her head.

"So that's why he went back to her…" he realized.

Rory shrugged. "I guess, it's just…"

"What?"

"They looked happy, Logan. Really happy."

"And you're not?" he questioned. "You're not happy?"

She shook her head.

He took a deep breath in anticipation of his next question. "Because you're not with him?" He tensed up, waiting for her answer. He knew it shouldn't affect him—how she felt about Dean—but even though they could never be together like that, the thought that she still might be in love with her ex broke his heart.

"See, that's the thing that I realized—Dean and I are just not meant to be. It was great the first time, but it ended. And then I started Yale. I moved away from home, and yeah, I had you guys, but you'd already been there for a year and you had your LDB stuff that I wasn't a part of yet."

"Rory," he tried to interject, but she just kept going.

"Everything was changing and it scared me. And there was Dean again and I just—I clung to him because I was so desperate to hold onto everything that seemed to be slipping away. I think, maybe, he was doing the same."

He nodded his head in understanding.

"And while we were busy holding onto each other, and the safety and comfort of our past—"

"What?"

"The world kept going, Logan. The world didn't wait for us. He wasn't supposed to be with me—I was his past. He was supposed to be with Lindsay, and the world has this funny way of making you see that."

"Because she was pregnant…" he finished.

"Logan?"

"Yeah?"

"This thing between us isn't going away."

"It _will,_" he said with determination. "It has to," he added, softer, almost inaudibly. He shifted his gaze away from her.

"I get it, Logan. You're holding onto the past. Everything is changing, and not in a good way. I get that you feel like you need to hold onto us the way we used to be—and some things never will change; you'll always be my best friend—but some things are going to be different, and there's nothing we can do about it."

"It's not that easy, Rory. There's too much at stake. You say you'll always be my best friend, but how do you know that? The last time everything fell apart—I lost you. I can't lose you again—not now." He lifted his head back up to look at her again as he blinked back the tears.

"Maybe…" she paused, gathering her thoughts. "Maybe the reason everything fell apart last time isn't because we acted on our feelings—maybe it was because we tried to pretend like it didn't mean anything."

"It only means what we want it to mean."

"Do you really believe that?"

"I have to."

She sighed. "OK, then." She dropped his hand and lay back in bed. "Are you staying here tonight? Because it's fine by me, but you might have some explaining to do with Steph in the morning."

He looked at her, disbelievingly, mouth agape. "That's it?" He was certain the fall out from this would be big—or at least _something_. But she was acting like everything was normal.

"You can only stay in the past for so long before life catches up to you, Logan. You'll have your epiphany soon enough. In the mean time, I already told you—you'll always be my best friend."

He looked from her, to the window and back to her again. "I have to go to Honor's this week and start packing up some of her stuff. Will you come with me?"

"I'm supposed to have a meeting with my Ancient Lit professor on Wednesday about my Beowulf paper, how about Thursday?"

"Yeah," he nodded, "Thursday's fine. I'm---I'm gonna go. You should enjoy the rest of your weekend. I'll call tomorrow," he promised.

"You better."

He smiled. "Night, Ace."

"Night, Logan" she mumbled, already falling back asleep.

He got out of bed and walked to the window, pushing it open and crawling back onto the oak tree. He turned around, closing the window behind him. He paused for a minute, watching her sleep again, before climbing his way back down. Maybe someday he'd be ready to grow up, but for now he was headed back to Neverland. Unlike Peter, though, he'd keep his promise to Wendy.


	20. Loose Ends

**AN: So some of you in the last chapter felt that Rory's change of heart came out of nowhere. I can kind of understand how you might have felt that way, we did see where she had her epiphany though, she had it in the video store with Dean. I just couldn't let you know it at the time, because I wanted it to be a surprise when she kissed him. I had hoped that I'd made the reasons for her change of heart clear in the aftermath of their little make-out session, but if not, hopefully this chapter will clear that up. Hope you enjoy.**

* * *

Rory fidgeted with her menu, deftly avoiding the gazes of her mother and best friend. If she looked at them, she'd feel compelled to speak to them in more than monosyllables, and then she was sure the whole embarrassing scene from her bedroom the previous night would come tumbling out of her mouth.

How could she have been so stupid? She'd literally thrown herself at Logan. And it wasn't even the first time. She didn't remember all the details of her initiation night, but little bits and pieces had come back to her and she was fairly certain that she had flirted, and even engaged in some inappropriate touching on the way over to the hotel. At least she could pretend to forget that, but there was no denying last night. She had been completely sober—if not in a bit of a sugar coma from their movie night.

Then, of course, there was her impeccable timing. After all, the things she had said to Logan had all been true. They needed to stop ignoring what was going on between them just because they were afraid to let go of their pasts. Their relationship was changing, and as much as she had fought it, seeing Lindsay and Dean had provided her with a sudden sense of clarity—she had romantic feelings for Logan. It wasn't just some fluke, it wasn't her being confused and lonely and reaching out for love. When she saw Dean with Lindsay, she'd realized that she was completely and totally over him. She didn't want Dean, or Robert, or any of the guys she'd dated recently. No one could make her feel the way she felt when she was with Logan. But god—groping him in the dark just weeks after his sister's death when he was still hurt and grieving, was beyond inappropriate. What if she'd really messed things up; they'd just put their friendship back together and she couldn't bear to screw it up again. She could only pray that he wasn't freaking out like she was.

"Honey, it's the same menu it's been for the passed twenty years we've lived in this town." Lorelai gently reminded her after a few minutes of silence.

"That's not true. Luke changed it last year when he was married to Nicole. He wanted to give her more salads, and he got rid of the Monte Cristo sandwich. Remember? I mean, I never really noticed the new stuff—what if I want one of these salads?"

"Rory, the day you want a salad—for breakfast nonetheless—is the day the apocalypse is upon us," Steph replied.

Rory sighed and shrugged her shoulders. "Fine, let's order," she relented, putting the menu down, but shifting her gaze around the diner so she wouldn't have to look at her dining companions.

Lorelai looked at her daughter imploringly. "He won't come in here," she assured Rory.

Rory startled at her mother's words, her eyes finally meeting Lorelai's before she realized what she was doing. "Huh?"

"He'd have to be a fool to come in here Rory," Steph agreed with the older woman. "You know how Luke hates him."

"He hasn't shown his face in the diner since the Bop-It fiasco." The Bop-It fiasco was an interesting story. When Rory and Dean had started dating again, Lorelai had tried to be supportive and had even suggested a double date with Rory, Dean, her and Christopher, but Rory had vetoed the idea immediately, not daring to put Dean under her father's scrutiny. As it turned out, it shouldn't have been Christopher that she worried about. They'd decided to have a small gathering at the Hayden household instead of the more intimate double date. Luke had been present, and apparently he had not been privy to the gossip mills—he hadn't know Rory and Dean were together again, and he wasn't happy about it. He took every chance he got to take potshots at Dean, and it had ended with a big blow out. Lorelai and Rory had quickly intervened, breaking out the Bop-It in a grand attempt to ease the tension. It only made things worse. Sportsmanship wasn't in Luke or Dean's vocabulary, apparently.

Not that it mattered. Rory didn't really care if Dean showed up one way or the other. She could understand why Steph and Lorelai thought she did though. Rory had refused to talk about the sighting when she got back to the house the previous night. And she certainly hadn't told them about Logan's late night visit. It only made sense for them to think she was upset about the pregnancy. "I don't care about Dean," she said before she could stop herself.

Lorelai and Stephanie gave her disbelieving looks.

"I don't," she insisted. It was now or never. She was slightly nervous to admit what happened, but other than Logan, the two people sitting before her were her biggest confidants, and as loathe as she was to admit to Stephanie that she had been right about Rory's feelings for Logan, if she couldn't confide to her and Lorelai, she couldn't confide in anyone. "I'm happy for him."

"Puh-lease," Steph scoffed. "For that lying, cheating bastard?"

"We both made a lot of mistakes," Rory confirmed.

"His were way worse."

"Maybe, but…"

"But what?" Lorelai asked.

"But he's the one who seems to have it all figured out now. He went back to Lindsay, he moved on with his life, and he's happy now."

"So you're more jealous of the fact that he's happy then the fact that he's happy with someone else?"

"No…yes…I don't know. It's just…I'm over Dean. That's what I realized when I saw him."

"O…K"

"So then the question is—why can't I move on with my life? Everything that's been happening—sleeping with Logan, dating all those other guys, I thought I was doing it because I was trying to fill this void that Dean left, but apparently, it turns out I wasn't doing it because of him after all."

Steph sighed. "Are you really that dense, Rory? I've told you over and over again that—" She was cut off by the sounds of "I'm Too Sexy," cutting through the air.

Rory quickly grabbed her cell phone and hit silence. She glanced up at the "No Cell Phone" sign Luke had up before turning back to her mother and friend. "I'll be right back," she told them as she took her phone and headed outside, a smile plastered on her face.

"Logan?" Lorelai asked, as the door closed behind her daughter.

"Logan," Steph confirmed.

"So, you think this means she's finally figured it out?"

"God, I hope so."

* * *

"I'm thirsty," Rory said, looking up from the art history notes lying on the floor in front of her. "Do you want some water?" she asked Logan as she stood up, ready to head to the refrigerator.

"Huh?" he said, startling out of his daze. "Oh, yeah, water would be good."

Rory looked down at him. "You're not highlighting," she commented.

Logan glanced at the completely black and white text before him. "Oh, yeah, well…"

"Are you alright? I mean, if you're not up for this, I'm sure your professors would give you an extension on your exams."

Logan shook his head. "No, it's fine. It gives me something to focus on other than…It's fine," he stated.

"If you're sure," Rory replied hesitantly, opening the refrigerator and staring at the contents. "Seriously, Logan, there's nothing in here but beers, lime, and salsa."

Logan chuckled a little. "I guess Colin and Finn cleared it out to make room for the essentials this weekend."

Rory sighed. "Do you have a dollar? I'll run down to the vending machine and get us something to drink."

"Hold on," he reached into his pocket and grabbed his wallet out, opening it up to see the money within. "I don't suppose those machines take twenties, do they?" he asked sheepishly.

"Not usually, no. Let me see what I've got." Rory opened her purse, pulling out the contents and setting them on the coffee table until she finally came to her wallet. She pulled out two crisp singles and set the rest of the wallet on the table with the rest of her things. "I'll be right back."

Logan watched as Rory walked out the door, before turning his attention back to the chemistry text in front of him, hoping to distract himself for a little while longer. He read the same paragraph three times before he was interrupted by the ringing of a phone. Looking up, he noticed Rory's cell vibrating across the table. He sighed and reached over to grab the phone. A name flashed on the LCD screen, just as he was about to answer. Logan jabbed his finger into the silence button and angrily tossed the phone onto the couch he was leaning against.

He tried to take a few calming breaths but it didn't seem to be working. He didn't know why he was so angry—actually, that wasn't true, he knew exactly why he was angry, but he also knew he didn't really have that right. He had Rory had never actually discussed their falling out; it all seemed to fade into the background in the wake of Honor's death. He shouldn't have just expected things to change back to the way they had been. But then, what about what happened at her place the other night? But he had turned her down; told her they couldn't be, so he really had no right to be upset. Funny how that knowledge didn't seem to calm him down at all. He stood up and began pacing the room, trying to sort out his conflicting, jumbled thoughts. He let out a growl of frustration, just as the door to the suite opened and Rory came walking back in.

"Hey, I got you a Coke. You looked tired, thought the caffeine might help." She stopped a few steps into the room when she noticed him staring at her with a scowl on his face. "Or you can have the water…" she offered, holding out the other bottle. He said nothing. "Logan, what's the matter?"

"You're phone rang while you were gone," he told her coldly.

"Who was it?"

"Why don't you take a look and see?" he motioned to her phone where it had landed on the couch.

Rory hesitantly walked towards her phone, picking it up and pressing a button to take her to her missed calls. The name "Robert" flashed on the screen. She let out a deep breath, squeezed her eyes shut for a moment, and then focused them on the blond standing a few feet away. "Logan," she said carefully.

"You're still seeing him?" he asked.

"What? No? I was never _seeing_ him. I saw him once."

"So that's why you have his number programmed into your phone? You do that for all your guys, or just the special ones?"

"He's in the LDB, Logan. I have most of the LDB members programmed in. It has nothing to do with the date we went on. Why are you getting like this, Logan? I thought we were passed this."

"Yeah, well…so did I," he admitted with a sigh.

She approached him slowly, laying a gentle hand on his arm. "Sit," she told him. He sat down on the sofa and she sat next to him, turning to the side so she was facing him.

"I'm not seeing Robert, Logan. Or anyone else anymore for that matter."

"Why?"

"Why aren't I seeing them anymore?" she asked for clarification.

"No. Why…why _were_ you seeing them?"

Rory chuckled, and Logan gave glared at her. "I'm not joking Rory. I mean, I know I don't have a right to ask this, it's none of my business, but I…I need to know.

"It's OK, I wasn't laughing at…It was just a little déjà vu, that's all," she said, thinking of the conversation she'd had with Lorelai and Stephanie only a few days before. After a moment, she continued on. "That night that we spent together, a lot of it is a big drunken blur, but I remember some things, most of all, I remember the way you made me feel."

"Was it good? I made you feel good, right?" he asked in a little kid voice, the mood starting to lighten. "I was totally on my game that night."

She slapped him playfully upside the head. "Must you be such a big baby?" she teased. "Yes, alright, you made me feel good."

Logan gave a succinct nod of his head. "Good, that's how you deserve to feel," he answered sincerely.

"I'd just been so upset about the whole break-up," she continued on. "I don't think it was so much about Dean specifically, as it was about feeling like I wasn't good enough. I wasn't enough for him, so he went back to Lindsay. And then I started down the whole self destructive, 'if I'm not good enough for him, will I ever be good enough for anybody?' and 'why didn't he love me?' paths," she said, trying to explain her state of mind. She wasn't sure how well she was doing, but she hoped he'd understand.

"You realize that's crazy talk, right?"

She laughed, softly. "Yes, Logan," she replied placatingly. "I get it, I just…didn't feel it. And then all of a sudden I felt it again—only not from him, from you. When I was with you that night, I felt whole in a way I hadn't in a really long time. Only then we woke up, and we tried to pass it all off as a drunken, meaningless, mistake."

"I told you it wasn't meaningless, Ace. I know everything got messed up and it turned out to be this huge mistake, but at the time, it felt right, you know. I _do_ love you. Don't ever doubt that."

"I don't," she assured him. Whatever happened romantically between them, she would never doubt he loved her, even if it never turned out to be the kind of love she was starting to feel for him.

"Then why?"

"Because I wanted to find that feeling again. I wanted it so badly, and I knew that you were out of the question, so…"

"So you went looking elsewhere…" It was a statement, not a question. Rory nodded her head in the affirmative.

"God, Rory," he said angrily, standing up from his spot on the couch. "What the hell is wrong with you? You can't just go around sleeping with random guys hoping that they can put you back together again. How can you be so damn stupid? I mean, look at you. You're gorgeous, and you're smart and you're funny. You're friggin' perfect and if you can't see that, no horny, college guy is going to be able to. You deserve better than that. You deserve so much, fucking, better," he ranted.

"Logan," she grabbed his hand to stop his rant.

"What?' he asked flippantly.

"There's something you should know. I…." She stumbled on her words under his scrutinizing gaze. She didn't want him to think things of her that weren't true, he deserved to know. "I didn't sleep with them."

"You…you didn't?"

She shook her head. "I couldn't go through with it. A part of me wanted to, but deep down, I knew it wasn't the answer to my problems."

He nervously shifted his feet, not sure how to even begin to show his relief. A part of him wanted to do cartwheels, to pick her up and swing her around and then kiss her senseless. Instead, he just replied with "Oh, um…good." He sat back down on the couch next to her.

"Can I ask you a question now?"

"Yeah, of course."

"Why _did_ it bother you so much?"

Logan sighed. "I'd have thought it was obvious."

"Maybe it is, but…but I need to hear you say it.

"I was jealous," he shrugged his shoulders. "I was out my friggin' mind with jealousy, Rory. I tried to pretend I wasn't, but I was."

"But why? I mean, if you don't want to be with me…"

"I never said I didn't want to be with you."

"But…"

"But nothing, Rory. You said it yourself. This thing between us isn't going away. And it's not one sided. I _want_ to be with you. Sometimes it takes everything I have not to just grab you and kiss you. The other night, I don't even know how the hell I stopped you because the thought of being with you again…God, Rory. You have no idea. I want you, but…I don't know. Maybe what you said the other night is true, maybe I'm just trying to hang onto the past, but I have to hang on to something, because I just can't risk losing anymore than I already have. I've already lost Honor, I can't lose you too."

"But why do you have to? Why does being with me automatically mean that you'll lose me?"

"It's who I am, Rory. I'm a great, big, ginormous screw up. Just ask dear old Dad. I'll mess it up, I'll hurt you. I don't know how to be the loving boyfriend, I don't know how to be that guy for you…I just don't know how."

"Maybe you're right…" she admitted. "Maybe you will screw up. Or maybe I'll screw up—look at my track record, Logan; I'm the one who slept with my married ex-boyfriend after all. You can never predict the future. But just because one of us screws up, doesn't mean it has to be the end of us. If we don't work out, we'll figure something else out, because I don't want to lose you anymore than you want to lose me."

"That's one of those things that's easier said than done, Rory. I'm just not willing to take that chance. I'm sorry."

"No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have pushed," she admitted, with a sigh, laying her head on his shoulder.

"I love you," he admitted, putting his arm around her shoulder.

"I love you too."

"So, is that Coke sill up for grabs?"

Rory laughed. "It's all yours."

* * *

**Sorry, it's not my best ending, I know, I hope things in this chapter weren't too repetitive, but like I said, in the first AN, the first half was important since some people were still confused, and the second half, well I know they'd forgiven eachother and all, but I couldn't not have them hash out the issues that led to their fight in the first place. Anyhow, like always, feedback is highly appreciated. Thanks guys.**


	21. Life as We Know it

**So, 1 year ago to the day, I started this written exploration of the bonds of family and friendship, the roles of the people in our lives, and way we deal with change.** **I hope I have accomplished what I set out to do, as today that story comes to an end. That's right folks--the end is here. There will be a short epilogue to follow which I hope to have up before the night is out, then it's over. I understand that many of you may feel that this story has just gotten to the good part, but unfortunately the "good part" just doesn't fit in this tale. This story is angst through and through and while it's got it's happy ending, there is no way, given the events that occured, that I can justify adding lots of fluff to the end. I appreciate all of you who have stuck through this story for the past 365 days and all of you who have discovered it more recently. The response you guys have given me has been at times, quite overwhelming. Thank you for your support. Now on with the story ;)**

* * *

The oak door stood imposingly before them. Logan had visited Honor there maybe a half a dozen times or so since she had taken up residency in the Huntzberger's Manhattan penthouse after her graduation from Trinity College a year and a half earlier, and the door had never felt so cold and uninviting before. He felt Rory put a hand on his shoulder and he relaxed slightly.

"We don't have to go in. We can come back if you're not ready," she assured him.

"No," he answered. "I need to do this." Logan nodded his head in determination. "The movers will be here next week."

"Movers?" Rory asked.

"Dad hired movers to pack up all of her stuff so he wouldn't have to deal with it," he told her, evenly. She hated the detached tone of his voice—as though he'd completely resigned himself to the fact that his father was an ass. She knew that is was a defense mechanism, and that if he continued to care about Mitchum Huntzberger's emotional illiteracy, it would drive him mad; she just wished he didn't have to be put in such a position.

"What are they going to do with it?"

Logan shrugged. "They'll probably stick all the boxes in the basement somewhere behind the first printing press great, great grandpa Huntzberger ever printed a HPG newspaper on." He couldn't let that happen. He couldn't let them hide away his sister's entire existence. He would save what little of her he could.

"Well, we did have some good times with that printing press," Rory offered, trying to lighten the mood.

"You tried to hide behind it from Finn one time when he was going through one of his early naked phases and you got stuck on one of the gears and couldn't get out. It took us hours to find you," Logan laughed.

"I wasn't talking about _that_ time." Rory cringed at the memory. "Finn _was_ the one who finally found me and he wouldn't get me free until he'd pointed out every one of his invisible, new chest hairs."

"Oh yes," Logan laughed some more. "When Colin and I found you two, Finn was on number twenty-three and you were as red as that SuperGirl cape you'd been wearing everywhere."

"I was breaking it in for my Halloween costume, Logan," Rory defended huffily. "And it wasn't a SuperGirl cape, it was a Wonder Woman cape. Wonder Woman was a hundred times cooler than SuperGirl could ever hope to be."

Logan swallowed uncomfortably as an image of grown up Rory in a Wonder Woman costume flitted through his mind. "Let's go in," he said tersely, grabbing the key from his pocket. Suddenly the thought of going in didn't seem so daunting. At least it would distract him from thoughts of peeling tight, blue and white starred hot pants off his best friend's long, shapely legs. He'd made his choice as far as that was concerned, and he chose their friendship. It meant too much to him to let anything, especially his libido, jeopardize it.

He unlocked the door, and turned the knob, letting it swing open. He felt Rory's warm hand brush against his as her fingers moved to interlace themselves with his own digits. She gave him a reassuring squeeze as they walked silently through the open door.

Logan took a quick look around the living room in front of him. He could feel tears start to well up and he closed his eyes, trying to push them back. This was where his sister had lived. This was where she ate and read, and watched TV and this was where she slept each night, dreaming of things she would never have the chance to make come true.

In a few days, the apartment would be bare and empty—the home she had created would, like her, be no more than a memory. It wasn't fair.

"What are we looking for?" Rory asked softly, interrupting his thoughts.

Logan shrugged. "Things to remember her by. Things…" he sighed. "Things that were important to her, I guess. I was just kind of hoping I would recognize it when I saw it."

Rory nodded her head in understanding. He was looking for that connection with his sister. Something that would remind him of her and everything they went through together. She squeezed his hand again. "Where should we start?'

"I guess this is as good a place as any." He motioned to the room around them. They were silent for a moment again, not moving. Logan finally took a deep breath, letting his eyes search the room. There was, what was undoubtedly, a priceless Cassatt on the wall next to them. Honor loved art, especially impressionism, and took a special interest in female artists. He took a moment to admire the painting before letting his eyes wonder further, until they landed on the mantle above the fire place. "Let's go," he told Rory, walking slowly across the room.

They stopped in front of the fire place and Rory removed her hand from his, placing it comfortingly on his shoulder as he picked up the first picture off of the ledge. It was a picture of Honor dressed in a flowery skirt and a cashmere sweater set. Josh was behind her and he had his arms wrapped around her waist with an offering of daisies in his hand. She looked so incredibly happy. He set the picture down and continued to look at the rest. There were a few more with Josh and a couple with a few of her friends. He was approaching the end of the ledge when he saw a picture that made him stop. A small boy and a slightly older girl were in a large yard with a large, slobbery yellow lab. The dog was standing in a baby pool full of sudsy water, his head swung to the side and his ears blurred with motion as he shook the soap bubbles every which way, dousing the two children who had been attempting to bathe him.

Logan remembered that dog. He had named him Mohawk due to the funny tuft of hair on the top of his head. The lab had wondered onto their property one summer afternoon when he was six. Mohawk had been covered from head to tail in mud. Anna, the nanny, had filled the baby pool with soap and water and gotten them some old rags so that they could give the dog a bath. With little cooperation from Mohawk, they managed to get all of the dirt off of him and the two kids had spent the rest of the day playing fetch, and tug of war, and chasing the dog around the yard. Logan fell instantly in love with that damn dog. When he brought him up to the house at the end of the day to introduce him to his parents, the elder Huntzbergers had not been pleased. They immediately called the animal control officers and had the lab carted away like a criminal. Logan cried for two days straight. He hadn't thought about his canine companion in years.

"Did I ever tell you about Mohawk?" he asked Rory. She shook her head in the negative. Logan put the picture back down, shoving his hands in his pockets. He didn't take his eyes off the photo the entire time he relayed the story to his best friend.

Rory wrapped her arms around him and drew him into a great big hug. "It sounds like you gave him a really good day," she responded, lifting her head to look up at his face. "I bet he appreciated that."

"But then he got taken away," he answered, and in barely a whisper he added, "just like everyone else I cared about."

Rory tightened her hold on him. "Not everyone," she assured him.

He tilted his head down so his eyes met hers and responded to the unspoken portion of her statement. "You got taken away too," he reminded her. "You're just the only one that came back." They stayed in their embrace for a while before they finally broke apart. Logan picked the picture back up and placed into the bag he had brought with him.

The two friends continued around the room with few words as Logan lost himself in his memories. He was looking over the collection of books in the built in book cases when he caught Rory staring at something out of the corner of his eye.

"What?" he asked as he turned around to find what she was looking at. Her gaze was on the coffee table in the middle of the room. "Magazines?" he questioned as that appeared to be the only thing there. She moved towards the table and he followed her.

She picked up the top magazine which had been left open to a page with a yellow post–it on it. There was a picture of a woman in wedding gown. Rory put the periodical back down on the table and picked up what had been underneath it. It wasn't another magazine like the other items on the table. This appeared to be a sketchbook. Rory flipped open the cover to the first page. Honor's name was written in cursive at the top. Underneath was a sketch of a woman wearing a strapless gown with a full skit that had a train that extended off the edge of the page. It was shaded in white with tons of little sparkly detail and a few swatches of silk and lace were glued onto the page. The next few pages were similar variations of the first dress. Rory continued to flip through the pages, in awe of her friend's hidden artistic talent. Finally the wedding dresses stopped and there was a page labeled "Alexadra." The sketch on that page was of a floor length dress with a deep-v neck line and an empire waist with a flowing a-line skirt. It was shaded in a periwinkle blue. The next page was for Walker and had a dress similar to Alexandra's only the top was strapless and went straight across the bust. Rory flipped the page once more and let out a barely audible gasp.

Logan stepped closer and looked over her shoulder. He stared down at the page which had Rory's name scrawled across the top in elegant hand-writing. There was a sketch of her in a dress shaded in the light blue color Honor had chosen for her wedding. The a-line skirt went from just below the bust all the way down to the floor, just like the others. The top had a sweetheart neckline and spaghetti straps. It was beautiful.

"I didn't…I mean, she never…" Rory took a deep breath before speaking again. "She hadn't asked me yet. I didn't know."

Logan gently touched her shoulder from his spot behind her. "You were like a sister to her, Rory. Of course she wanted you to be one of her bride's maids."

Rory leaned back against his chest and took a few deep breaths to steady her emotions. She had come to support him, but as always they were there to support each other. Logan brought his had around and pushed the sketchbook to Rory's chest. "Take it," he told her.

"What?" she asked, automatically gripping the book tighter and turning to look at him for confirmation.

"You should take it," he repeated. "It obviously means a lot to you, and I'm certain it meant a lot to her. Maybe you won't get to be her bride's maid now, but at least this will help remind you."

"Thank you," she whispered, wiping a tear from her cheek and then throwing her arms around him, being careful not to crinkle the pages of the sketchbook she still held.

"Of course," he replied, placing a kiss on the top of her head. "Besides, someday you're going to get married, and maybe you can have a little bit of Honor with you when that day comes." If he ever got over the urge to castrate every guy that so much as looked at her funny.

They finished exploring the living room, adding a few more things to the pile of tangible memories they had collected. They moved quickly through the kitchen and the large storage closet before finally beginning on the bedroom. Logan found a couple more photos to add to his collection. He looked quickly through the closet and was just about to shut the door when a box on the top shelf caught his attention. He pulled it down and once again felt his eyes filling with tears. Inside was a neatly folded quilt. He recognized the quilt as one that he had seen in several pictures of her as a baby. It had been hand sewn by their great-great-grandmother before Huntzberger women had decided that any sort of manual labor was below them. The box also contained her favorite teddy bear from her childhood, an antique baby dishware set with sterling silver spoons, and a soft, pink onesie with a little ballerina skirt and a picture of the ballerina hippo from Fantasia.

Rory was overwhelmed by emotion as well, but when the sentimental look in Logan's eyes turned to one of fiery anger, she had to stop herself from laughing. She squeezed his shoulder where her hand had been resting. "It's a girl thing, Logan." She quickly told him. "It doesn't mean what you think it does." He turned to look at her skeptically. "I swear," she assured him. "Mom has my baby stuff all stored away for when the time comes for me to pass it on. All this means is that _someday_ she planned on making you and uncle."

They were silent again, staring down at the collection of things, knowing that now Logan would never have the chance to be an uncle—at least not by blood. Maybe that, at least, was for the best; Honor would have made a wonderful mother but the rest of his family was not something he would have wished upon his greatest enemy, let alone a tiny, innocent child. Logan put the baby things with the rest of the stuff he would be taking with him.

They had finally made their way through the whole apartment and Logan took one last look around the bedroom, preparing to leave. He and Rory both started to make their way back into the living room, but Logan suddenly stopped. "Wait."

Rory stopped as Logan walked towards the small desk in the corner upon which sat a lap top computer and a printer. He picked up an accordion folder up off the surface of the desk.

"What's that?" she asked.

He pulled out the papers and looked at the top sheet.

Life as We Know it

By Honor Huntzberger.

"It's her book." He smiled brightly at the pages before him. She had really done it. She had written a book.

"Her what?"

"Her book." He looked up at Rory. "She wrote a book."

* * *

They had gotten home from the city late, nearly midnight in fact, and Logan had decided just to do some light reading before he went to bed. He had changed into his Yale sweat pants and t-shirt and sat down on the couch with his sister's manuscript.

Ten hours later he tiredly put the pages down. He had fallen asleep on the couch around 3 AM and had woken again at 9 and he had just continued reading. Lawrence, the lovable, trouble making brother of the main character, Hope, was about to have drunken sex with his best friend, Aurora. Apparently Honor hadn't been lying when she said she needed some new material for her book. The funny thing was, the sexual tension between Lawrence and Aurora had been intense from the very first chapter. Had it been planned that way by Honor just for her story? Or did he and Rory really have that kind of chemistry long before they even realized it?

As Logan waited for the coffee to brew, he sent occasional glances towards the sofa and the waiting manuscript. He knew he was going to give in a read the rest of it. Would Honor have written things the way they actually happened? While the characters were certainly based off of the real people in his sister's life, only bits and pieces of actual events had been used thus far—so maybe he wouldn't have to read a narrative of the complete mess he'd made of his life. Plus, Honor had finished the book which meant that the end was written before he and Rory made up. He figured Honor to be the 'happy ending' kind of girl. But then the question was—how _did_ it end?

Logan filled a mug with the coffee, took a big, comforting sip, and headed back to the couch.

* * *

It was just passed noon as Rory made it back to her room after her classes. She liked not having any afternoon classes on Friday because it gave her a chance to get a lot of her homework out of the way before the weekend really began. She threw her book bag down on the couch in the common room and collapsed next to it. Maybe today she would just take a nap instead. She was exhausted from having gotten back from the city so late and then having to get up for an 8 AM class.

She curled her feet under her, and laid her head down on the arm rest of the sofa knowing Paris wouldn't be home for another few hours anyway. Just as she was about to drift off, she was startled awake again by a knocking at the door. She started to get up when she head it again. Rory rolled her eyes. "I'm coming, I'm coming," she groaned as she approached the door, turning the lock and pulling it open.

"I'm an idiot." Logan walked into the apartment.

Rory closed the door and turned to look at him. "Umm…ok," she replied.

Logan paced back and forth in front of Rory who was still standing in front of the door, wondering what was going on.

"I'm an idiot," he repeated.

"So you've said."

"I mean, Lawrence can figure it out, so why the hell can't I?" he asked, waving his hands around manically, clutching on to a large green folder.

"Lawrence?"

"Yes, Lawrence," he repeated, taping the folder agitatedly with his free hand.

"Is that Honor's book?" Rory asked, still incredibly confused.

Logan gave her a look. He didn't say anything, but the look said it all. She could almost _hear_ the look replying "well duh."

"OK, just checking," she held her hands in front of her in surrender.

"I stayed up all night reading it."

"You haven't slept?

"Well, OK, I didn't stay up _all_ night, but that's hardly the point here." He snapped.

"The point which would be that…you're an idiot?" she asked.

"Exactly."

"OK, you seem strangely perturbed. Perhaps it would be best if we sat," she suggested, taking his arm and leading him to the couch. They both took a seat. "Now why don't you try explaining this to me again. Perhaps give me a little more than the name of a character from your sister's book and a self deprecating comment."

Logan sighed. "This," he said, holding up the manuscript and then placing it down on the coffee table, "is how it was supposed to happen. Lawrence is me—or at least the old me. This guy I've been lately—it's not who I am. I don't shy away from something I want just because I'm scared of all the 'what ifs.' I'm Logan freaking Huntzberger, I don't get scared. I laugh in the face of 'what ifs.'"

"Well you've been through a lot lately, you're bound to be a little shaken up, it's natural."

"No," he shook his head. "Even before everything with Honor happened I was acting like an idiot. I was scared. I was so scared because you were always one of the most important people in my life and then in one night, everything changed and as much as you meant to me before, you suddenly meant so much more. I'm not used to being that reliant on people, Rory. Sure, I've always relied on you and Honor, and Colin and Finn and Steph, but mostly, I've always relied on myself and suddenly I realized how much I needed you and it scared me to death because I knew I could lose you."

"Logan," she brought her hand up to gently cup his cheek.

"But it's stupid. _Fear_ is stupid—or at least letting it control me like that was, and it wasn't me. Lawrence reminded me of that."

Rory glanced at the folder on the table. "What did he _do?" _she asked curiously, reaching her arm out for the story.

Logan grabbed her hand. "Something I should have done a long time ago," he replied, forcing her to look him in the eyes.

"What?" she swallowed hard under his suddenly intense gaze.

"Told his best friend that he loved her, and he wanted to be with her."

"Logan," she whispered as his lips inched their way closer and closer. He kissed her, softly at first and she responded, wrapping her arms around his neck. Her mouth opened for him and he pushed his tongue inside. He leaned her back until she was lying on the couch. His hands went to the small expanse of skin on her midriff that was exposed from the bunching of her shirt.

"I love you, Ace, and I want to be with you," he whispered in between kisses. She suddenly pushed him back up.

"OK, now I really need to find out what happened," she responded with a smirk.

He looked at her incredulously as she sat up, until she reached out for the manuscript again and he suddenly laughed. "Hey," he playfully slapped her hand. "You're about to break one of the cardinal rules of the literati. 'Thou shalt not read the end of the book first.'"

"No fair," she pouted.

"Nuh uh, no way," he shook his head vehemently. "You're not going to get to me with that Bambi pout."

Her pout grew. "Hmmp," she crossed her arms over her chest and turned away slightly. "Some boyfriend you are."

Silence filled the room. "What did you say?" he asked after a moment.

"Boyfriend," she replied cautiously, turning her head back to face him and nervously biting on her lip.

He grabbed her and kissed her again. "I like the sound of that," he whispered, their lips now separated, but their foreheads still pressed together

"Are you sure?" she asked. "You're not scared anymore?"

Logan chuckled ironically. "I'm absolutely terrified," he admitted. "But if it isn't scary, it isn't worth doing." He ran his thumb softly over her cheek and brought his lips down again. "Yep, definitely worth it."

"Logan?"

"Hmm?"

"I love you too…now be a good boy and go get me some coffee to drink while I read," she ordered, once again, trying to reach for Honor's book on the coffee table.

"I don't think so," he laughed, tackling her and pinning her down on the couch, holding her hands above her head with one of his own as he leaned down to kiss her, his free hand traveling teasingly up and down her side. "You see, after Lawrence confesses his feelings to his girl, they have mad passionate sex right on the couch in the middle of her dorm."

"Is that so?" Rory giggled.

"Uh huh," he nodded.

"So you're trying to tell me that your sister wrote a torrid love seen for her little brother's alter ego?"

"Ugh," he pulled back. "Oh god, what the hell was I thinking," he cringed. "I'm really going to have to work on the lies I use to get you into bed with me."

Rory laughed, and gently pulled Logan down on top of her again. "How about we just make our own ending," she whispered as her lips found his again. This time they continued on uninterrupted, experiencing all the perks of being more than just friends—and this time it was anything but meaningless.


	22. Epilogue

**4 years later…**

Logan pulled into a parking spot and turned off the engine of his porsche. "You ready?" he asked.

Rory nodded her head, pulling her wool mittens over her hands. "You?" she asked.

"This is the easy part. _She'll _be genuinely happy for us."

"Mom and Dad will be too," she assured him.

"Lorelai, yes—Christopher I'm not so sure about. He hasn't been so keen on me since he found out our relationship was not so platonic anymore."

Rory laughed. "He was grilling steaks for dinner and he threatened you with the pitch fork if you dared to deflower me before the wedding."

"Well, I technically kept _that_ promise."

"That you did," she patted him on the shoulder reassuringly. "You can't take something that isn't there anymore, after all."

"Shoosh you," he admonished. "Let's go."

"Hold on," she stopped him, leaning over the seat to wrap his cashmere scarf tighter around his neck. "And button up the rest of your jacket, it's freezing outside."

"Yes, mom," he rolled his eyes sarcastically.

Rory gasped. "Don't you dare compare me to Shira Huntzberger."

"Weeeell…" Logan started.

"Don't you dare finish that sentence, mister," she warned him.

"Fine, fine," he relented, opening his door and stepping out of the car, pulling a bouquet of flowers with him. He made his way around to Rory's side and let her out. She stepped out into the parking lot, and immediately wrapped her mittened hand around his free one as they started to walk towards the gate of the cemetery. They made their way quietly through the path until they reached the grave site they were looking for.

"Hi Honor," Rory waved a small yet spastic wave at the headstone.

"Hi sis," Logan added, slightly more somber than his companion. "We have really good news to share with you." He turned to Rory.

"Go on," she urged him, gripping his hand reassuringly. "You should tell her."

He nodded. "Alright." He turned back to his sister's grave. "You see, last night…last night I asked Rory to marry me—and she said yes," he smiled at the memory. It had been an amazing night. He had spent hours cooking her dinner and he had decorated the apartment with lights and flowers and candles and they had made love in front of the fire. It was all ridiculously cliché, but it had been perfect nonetheless.

"You know I've always thought of you as a sister, Honor, and I think you feel the same, but now we get to be sisters for real," Rory smiled brightly. "I just wish you could be here to see it."

"You're the first person we've told," Logan informed her. "I thought you deserved that, seeing as you helped us finally get together."

"The book is still on the best-seller list, by the way," Rory interrupted. Rory and Logan had sent the book to several publishing houses and it had been a hit.

"Anyhow," Logan continued, "no one else knows yet. I didn't even tell Colin and Finn I was planning it, although Finn was acting a bit suspicious when I asked him to watch Mohawk last night so I could have a romantic night with my girl," Logan smirked. Rory had gotten him a yellow lab puppy with a strange tuft of hair for his birthday two years ago.

"I wanted to ask you a favor," Rory added softly. "I want to use your designs for the dresses. They're beautiful, and this way, a part of you could share the day with us. We promise to name our first born after you," she added sheepishly.

"Our first born _girl_," Logan added. "No offense sis, but if we named a son after you, he'd be sure to get beat up on a regular basis.

"Logan," Rory scolded.

"Well it's true, Ace," he defended. "Honor is _not_ a good name for a boy."

"There's still a thing called tact," she mumbled.

"Oh please," Logan scoffed. "Honor doesn't care about that. She knows we love her." He bent down to put the flowers on her grave, and Rory joined him.

"We love you, Honor," Rory repeated, touching the snow covered ground softly. They stayed there for a few minutes, each saying their silent words to the woman who had meant so much to them both. So much had changed in their lives over the past several years, but in the end, they were all still family.


End file.
